with the img html tag. I didn't know if it was allowed, so I pasted links before. But this was just a small-sized one, so I put the img tag. I hope I didn't break the forum rules.

I can really relate to your words on your last post pea. I gave up a well-paying respectable job in order to do my masters then my PhD, both with bursaries. And during this time, my boyfriend's salary got even bigger. His family started to treat me as if I am a gold digger. I've always looked after myself, never took anything even from my family, did all sorts of stupid jobs to pay bills. Now having to put up with his family's comments is driving me crazy. But I try not to let it show much. After all, they haven't got the last say in anything, and this is just a temporary stage in my life.

Can you not just continue as it is for a while? Because things like family and PhD is causing the majority of the problems, they are temporary too. Do you think the relationship is worth saving? What your boyfriend and you do for each other is not his family's business. Obviously they can't appreciate the power of knowledge or what you have to give up for it, but they only care about money.

oops I wasn't quick enough pea

dear fluffymonster. I've never been there, so I won't be able to give you the best answer. But, in my opinion, you are being very hard on yourself. Viva is part of the PhD process. It's not about being perfect, and nobody expects you to be. In fact, that's one of the biggest reasons why you attend a viva. To experience an examination that big about your own work. You've never done it before, therefore nobody can expect you to be calm, or your actions to be strictly professional. Maybe at that point it was good that you've lost your nerve briefly. You did what came naturally to you, showed your feelings, showed them that you are a human being just like them and you care about your work. I'm sure you were much better than you feel right now. And the examiners decided that your work was good enough, that's what matters

Thank you for such informative reply fluffymonster. It's so nice to hear positive experiences. It must've been the longest 3 hours you've ever had

yick, do you feel like this towards anyone else? I think it is an important issue. Because your supervisor is one person who you will need to talk to most during your research. Or is it his approach that puts you off from speaking to him?

or not.. it could be me

Thank you Ann. Very useful information, as usual. I think you are right about the fellowships. It sounds like such a tough competition and there are so few of them advertised.

oh, and same way as I made your picture coastman, by photoshop

yeah, i suppose it looks a bit like showing off . I spent more time on forum than my work today. So I feel quite guilty, simpson-style punishment seemed right

my funding runs out at the end of August. When I looked for fellowships before, I couldn't find anything. Now there seems to be more fellowship positions advertised for September 2007.

Maybe you can try again this time next year? Apart from fellowships like Leverhulme's or British Academy's of course. Their deadlines are sooner, therefore they would require you to have a place before applying to them.

I'm so confused. I can't think outside my research at the moment. Writing a proposal in a different topic will be very difficult. And one of the deadlines is end of this month.

caravan without the cara

repeated websites twice

Guardian's jobs site would be a good start http://jobs.guardian.co.uk/index.html

You can also register yourself with a few specialised recruitment agencies. Checking the websites of relevant companies' websites also would be a good idea. Most advertise jobs on their vacancy pages, and some state that they accept applications from recent graduates (some big companies have graduate schemes, that would give a start-up grant for you to settle, find a place to rent etc.)