neither do I... but I'm getting closer with every comment!

Hey PhD bug - thank you so much! I will copy that and keep it. So useful(up)

Oi Bailey, this is a support forum - not a take it all out on someone else arena. If the moderators have any sense they will strike your comment off.

Aemillya: so sorry to hear about your loss. Be as kind to yourself as you possibly can and don't put pressure on yourself, your loss is so fresh. Remember how your grandfather treats you when you are hurt and how he wants you to be looked after now, at this the most difficult of times. I lost my sister 18 months ago and it took me at least a month after the funeral to able to function. You are in our thoughts and are not aloneX

Stressed: THANK YOU for the poem

Hey Rosy, this sounds like a great oppurtunity to relieve some PhD stress and clear up some annoying ******s in the process!! give em some welly.

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. I wrote to a few supervisors - once two in the same department before finding my current, excellent one. They can only say no - or yes. Personally, I'd only apply to a department if I knew there was a good match of supervisor who wanted to take me on. One no does not a winter make Good luck.

Hey, I log in here so I can read people moaning, makes me feel less alone!!! because I have no department - ahhh the luxury of actually hearing live PhDs winge... something I can only dream of at the moment. Maybe the stuff about where've you been was a bit of banter.

WELL DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hi Chrisrolinski  - During my teacher training they taught us about creating an atmosphere and an environment conducive to discussion. I always begin my module teaching with an exercise in which the students chat to the person next to them, find out a few things I ask them to such as name, where are they from, what they do or don't like about their subject/university/home town, what they hope to get from university life etc and then introduce the person they've been chatting to with that person's answers. I then expand the discussion picking up points I genuinely find interesting or funny. This means by the end of the first session each person in the group has spoken, but about someone else, which is always easier. I've been teaching seminars for 3 years now and have not had a problem with people not speaking. I think if you do this exercise with them early on and are relaxed, friendly and confident in your interactions with the students then you shouldn't have a problem. Teacher training is well worth it - makes life so much easier. Good luck! Also just relying on unstructured discussion for every session will result in dry spells so it always pays to have an alternative up your sleeve such as group exerises (very good for the shy students for reasons which I think were given above).

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rood

If you have to engage with this person I'd go along with Bonzo. But if you don't then I'd just make my excuses and leave her company as soon as I could, or you could tell her you are too busy working and don't have time to talk. If someone goes out of their way to do this then they think you are worth the effort. She is not, and she is also insulting your supervisor and department who do approve of your work, otherwise you wouldn't be studying with them. I wouldn't give her the time of day.

Also!! my ex - supervisor was in her late forties when she finished her PhD, had no teaching experience whatsoever when she started, is now well published and is a senior lecturer in a red brick so I really wouldn't worry about it. My dad's been a senior lecturer for over 25 years and says noone gives a hoot! they just care if you can do the job.

Hey BB I'm going to be 40 by the time my transfer to a new uni goes through and as someone who has taught in HE I think having a PhD can only help. I have a colleague who is 63 and he says that now he wouldn't take a PhD, but regrets not doing it in his 40s. Having no PhD and teaching in HE is a hard place to be. Looking for an HE post without a PhD is incredibly tough so I really think there is no competition, especially if your friend has funding for a full time place. If your friend goes back to full time HE teaching in their mid forties they still have 20 years of their career left, more if the retirement age goes up. In some ways I'm glad I'm doing this now and not in my early 20s because I have seen other pastures, had many interesting experiences and know for certain this is for me. 20 years is a long time in any career.

thanks bakuvia that's really very useful to me too. writing the first article is so daunting and seems to be such a mystery, it's good to have some guidelines

In case this is still relevant. I'd go with the one that makes you go oooooooohhh, because this is the foundation for your career and what you'll be focussing on throughout that. Also Oxford will open, not close doors for you. I did my MA at an internationally top of the league uni and it certainly did that for me. People see you in a different light, wrong or right that is the way it is, and that will last forever. And I'm sure it will be worth the money. Just my POV mind.