In fact most 'interesting' jobs aren't interesting all the time. Even film stars spend a fair amount of time sitting around at awful hours, waiting for takes. It ain't all red carpets and Oscars.

I really wouldn't think about starting a PhD until you have a clearer idea of what makes you tick on a day to day basis. Perhaps get some Research assistant work first, if you think research might be your bag. If not, have you considered genetic counselling? Genetic epidemiology? Or contact the Genetics Society (http://www.genetics.org.uk/) for careers ideas. But do have a think about what it is that motivates you. And do get some tangible experience before you commit yourself.

And do remember, for all his faults, your supervisor is not a mind reader. We here are very aware of all the hard work and planning you've been putting in. Because you've told us. But if you haven't told him what you've already achieved and how you plan to do the rest of it, then he has no evidence that you even understand the amount of work there is to do. From that respect, I can understand his concerns.

I really do wish you well with this. Just try to take things a small step at a time. You remember your book about writing your thesis 15 mins at a time? Well try to deal with the admin one piece at a time, and don't get too involved with what has happened in the past.

Good luck

Oops - my post got divided by Cake Girl's posts.

Anyway, I was just going to conclude by saying that the first thing you need to do is get that plan on paper. You've already posted bits here about what you plan to do when, so I reckon you must have a good idea in your head already. Then go and chill out for a bit, watch a DVD, have something nice to eat, whatever. Then compose an email to your supervisor. Just focus on what he needs to know right now (i.e. how you plan to achieve this and what you've already done). Don't send it straight away, go away and rest, then come back, re-read it and send if you're happy with it. Just focus on the issues at hand and don't let all the difficulties from the past affect how you handle this specific issue.

1. What does your supervisor need to know? (namely, how you plan to get the work done and what you've done already)
2. How are you going to communicate this to him? (PhD map/plan/Gantt chart whatever. You need to have this in place asap for your own benefit anyway, so you may as well make it your major priority).

Without these two things sorted in your head, you're only going to get yourself more and more upset. Yes, it sounds like you've been treated badly, and that there hasn't been the support/understanding that there should have been, but I think you're letting several years' worth of experience overwhelm you when trying to deal with this specific issue.

BilboBaggins said:
"What you need to convince your supervisor is how you are going to finish your thesis between now and September. Don't go over the past all over again. It won't help matters. Just focus on what you've been doing over the last few weeks, and how you plan to finish by September."

I totally 100% agree. If you want to get through this and not go mad in the process, you need to compartmentalise what's going on. There are some things that you perhaps need a counsellor's help with, but at the moment what you need to focus on is:

Seriously, I think the best way to proceed is to email him your detailed thesis plan, today if possible, and explain what parts you've achieved so far, and what your time frame for the rest of it is. Then he'll probably take you far more seriously.

I'm pretty sure that there is at least one software package that helps with this. I can't remember the name off the top of my head, but I'll look into it.

Lara, does your supervisor have any idea about how much work and planning you've done in the last few weeks? Cos if he doesn't, I can understand his reticence, If you let him know just how much effort you've made in the last month, and how much progress there's been, he'll see how much effort you've put in and how seriously you're taking it.

When you get your meeting with him, I imagine that his attitude will change, once you present him with your plan. Rise above your frustrations and show him how great you can be!

"I have the same experience explaining what I do to some friends that did not continue to further education- I am constantly saying no I'm not going to be a GP and no i don't go to lectures, I work on my own project!"

When people who don't understand grad research asked me what I did, I said I 'worked in a lab'. It was a far more effective way of conveying that I am occupied on a full time basis, and no I don't go to the odd lecture and then sit around watching day time TV. Doing a PhD is a full time job, and I wanted that recognition from people.

Although it has frustrated your writing process, the fact that you do have those published papers *will* help you. It'll be harder for examiners to criticise your work if it's been peer reviewed and published. Which isn't to say you won't have to do *any* defending. But it should give your confidence a boost to know that some of your data is already in print.

I've heard from several sources that for a science PhD (where you've got all the experiments finished) you should allow 3-4 months for writing up time.

I was 22 when I started my rotation year and 23 when I started my PhD (I had 4 years funding including a preliminary year).

But as I've just dropped out, I reckon I'll be at least 27 before I start another one. IF I start another one!

My advice? Don't feel you need to rush it. The British system is structured such that people rush straight through a relatively short Bachelors and can theoretically obtain a PhD by the age of 24. I think there is a lot to be said for taking one's time and gathering more experience en route.

I don't think earplugs are necessarily rude. No matter how considerate people are, if there are that many people in a small space, there are going to be distractions and noise. As long as your not aggressive in your deployment of them and make it clear that you're not using them as a statement of blame about other people's noisiness, I think people would hopefully be sympathetic.

I shared an office for a while with someone who used Skype a lot. Very hard to concentrate.

*they would probably want to know

Just be honest with both places - you won't be the first person in that scenario, and they would probably know so they can plan what to do if you decide to reject the place. There might be other people further down the chain for whom offers depend on your decision - it wouldn't be fair if they were rejected because you accepted a place that you then turned your back on.