Haha, I like this, it seems to sum up many of the threads on this forum! The funny thing is, I actually have manic depression (only it's called bipolar disorder now, which thankfully sounds less scary!), and my PhD does the exact opposite for me...it stabilises me, it gives me meaning and motivation, it gives me confidence, a wealth of friends and colleagues, and lots more besides. Not to say that there aren't times I have been frustrated and stressed of course, I think that's a given for anyone doing research. But my PhD experience so far has been overwhelmingly positive...just as well, I'm not sure I could handle bipolar and a shitty PhD experience! Anyway, if anyone needs a cure for bipolar, I think academia has done the trick for me...they should try funding PhDs on the NHS! KB

Have filled it in for you...I recognise some of the questions from other stuff I have completed and use one of the questionnaires in my own research....hope that doesn't matter! (I work in a psych department!). Good luck with it! KB

Hey! I'm a second year too! And am desperately trying to juggle so many things this year...my first year went really well but I hadn't quite anticipated how much I would have on my plate this year! Or maybe I had, but I just didn't realise how time-consuming some of it would be! Reading so many posts about how hard it is to get post-docs etc really drives home how important it is to fit everything in...the publications, the conferences, the teaching experience, the networking...but on the plus side I still love my project and my enthusiasm is intact which has to be a good thing. Still time to fall out with it though! Would be good to hear how other people are managing (or not) to fit all of this in and where people are up to etc! KB

Hey Wal, sounds like you need a break to re-charge your batteries. I'm only in second year so not at the same traumatic writing-up stage as you yet, but at times I just have to have a change of scene and have some fun for a few days and then come back to things- often is doesn't take that much to get me back on track, just some time out somewhere else and with people who can make me laugh. I know it's hard to take even just a little bit of time out but it will probably benefit you in the end. You are so far in and it sounds like you have dome so much stuff, you are most of the way there! I am working with people with Alzheimer's, so recruitment is also extremely difficult for me, it is just an ongoing, painfully slow battle...I also hate doing the sales pitch, it is my most disliked part of my project by a mile, but i guess it's just an unavoidable part of research unfortunately. Do you take time off at the weekend or do you just work? You should plan something fun to do this weekend...see friends or family, go see a film, go for a nice meal, have a day out, anything for a bit of escapism! I am going back to my parents' this weekend to catch up with people and do a bit of xmas shopping because i really just need to get away from my PhD for a couple of days and have something to take my mind off it! Then hopefully I will return on Monday feeling refreshed and full of life! Well, let's hope so! Best wishes, KB.

Hey Megara, to me it sounds as though you know what you want to do, and it isn't the PhD. I guess most people go through rocky patches with it, and usually we all encourage people to carry on and battle through it, but you've been thinking about this for a long time now and it really sounds like you have made your mind up that the PhD isn't for you. You've given it a year- I think you have spent enough time on it now to know that you are not enjoying it and that probably will not change. You also know what else you'd rather be doing with your time...maybe now would be a good time to make it happen. I have a poster on my office wall with the phrase on it, 'If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it. If you don't ask, the answer is always no. If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place'. Excuse the cheesiness of it (my office is filled with posters with cheesy quotes on them!) but it reminds me to chase what I want in my life. It can be hard, changing your mind about something that you thought you wanted, and sometimes it can be hard to act on it for the fear that you will regret it or change your mind back the other way. I have had to make a few early career changes (from applying to do vet science to changing my mind and withdrawing my applications, then going to do biology and dropping out in second year because it wasn't for me, then deciding to do psychology, which was finally the right decision!) and I am happier than ever now- I have never looked back. Of course the decision is your own, but sometimes tough decisions can turn out to be the best decisions ever once you have made up your mind. Do what is right for you and what will make you happy. That's my take on it anyway, of course other people might have different views on it. Best of luck with it, KB.

I have just started 2nd year and am also planning to publish as I go along. I have had my first paper published and am now working on my second- my supervisor and I have worked out a publication plan (lit reviews, results papers, discussion paper etc) so I know roughly how many papers I need to aim for and what they will consist of. Of course, this might not go to plan (it probably won't!), but that is what I am aiming for. Then apparently the thesis can basically consist of these publications, although I am sure some extra written work will be required to put them in context or link them up or whatever. There is some research saying that doing the phd by publication takes on average 4 months longer than doing the phd without publishing, but given how competitive the post-doc positions are, I wouldn't want to finish my PhD with no publications. I guess you could just get your thesis done and think about publishing afterwards- I know a few people who have done it that way...swings and roundabouts I guess! KB

Hi Anne! Are you an undergraduate or postgraduate? I don't have Aspergers so I can't offer you advice from a personal perspective, but as a PhD student I do some teaching, and I am aware that we have several students with Aspergers on our undergraduate course who are doing well in their studies, so I know it can be done. The other thing I will say is that I suffer from a mental illness (bipolar disorder), and I have found it very helpful to be open with my tutor and supervisors about this- I was a bit worried about telling them because of the stigma surrounding this sort of illness, but they have been nothing but supportive and helpful, and they are aware now of the best way to handle things if I am having difficulties. I also see a university counsellor and a university mental health advisor who have been able to provide both emotional and practical support- I think most universities have this sort of service. I don't know if you feel able to talk to anyone, but I have found that there is a lot of support out there if you speak to the right people...might be worth a try? All the best, KB.

Hey Natassia, glad to hear that things seem to be getting a bit better and that you are managing to cope okay. Don't worry about what others think- just cope in the way that is best for you. We all cope differently with things- I also like to just keep going with things through difficult times as far as I can. I remember a few years ago right after my nan's funeral I went off into town to buy myself some new trainers. My family thought I was nuts and maybe it was a tad insensitive but I just couldn't sit there in tears and think about things, I had to be up and on the move. It didn't mean I wasn't upset and hurting- I was devastated, but it was just my way of getting through it all. I hope things continue to pick up for you- let us know how things are going. All the best, KB.

Hey chick! Just to echo what the others have said really. Concentrate on your family, you can catch up with the work later- you need to be there for your relative now. You have already said that you can't work at the moment, and I suspect that will not change until your relative is getting better, so I wouldn't put yourself through the added stress of trying to force yourself through your work when it just isn't happening for you. If you really feel like you need to occupy yourself with something, perhaps there is something a bit more trivial and less demanding you can keep yourself busy with? Sometimes when I'm not feeling up to much for whatever reason I busy myself with photocopying or literature searching, reference lists etc....something fairly uncomplicated and mind-numbing! And keep in touch with your tutors etc and let them know what's going on- I'm sure they will be more than happy to give you the time you need to be with your family at the moment, but they won't be able to be understanding if they are not aware of your circumstances. Hope your relative starts getting better soon and that you are feeling as okay as can be expected in the circumstances...look after yourself! KB

I'm 27 and in the second year of my PhD. After a bad choice of BSc (followed by a change of course and uni!) and a few years off with health issues I have gone straight through BSc, MSc and now my PhD at the same university. I feel at quite a good age to be doing this...I suppose had I not changed subject and then been ill I would have been here around 5 years earlier, but because of this I have had the time to do quite a lot of paid and voluntary work with older adults, people with dementia, and children with disabilities, which has been invaluable given that my research is in clinical psychology. So no regrets really. There are about 70-80 PhD students in my department and most are in their mid-late 20s and 30s, with quite a few starting a PhD after a previous career. There don't seem to be many people older than this doing PhDs here...not sure really why that is. I think in my field practical experience can be extremely valuable when moving into research, so I think people who aren't straight out of uni would probably be at an advantage. My supervisors are both in their 50s and I quite like it that they are older and well-established, they seem very 'wise' and are a wealth of information- both research-wise and more generally life-wise! KB

I really struggle to chop and change task lots- I prefer to have a whole day or at least a whole afternoon at a time to spend on my writing. I find it hard just to work on something for an hour or two if it's a piece of writing- it takes me a while just to get in the mindset for it and to get going, so I like to have a nice chunk of time to work on it. I'm finding it hard at the moment because I'm out visiting participants lots, and also my teaching commitments, although not that significant, break up two of my weekdays. I am trying to write my next paper but it's really hard to get going on it with so much else going on...hopefully my participants won't want to see me around Christmas and I will get a few weeks of time to do my writing! KB

Hi Sue!

No, it honestly wasn't directed at you at all- sorry if it looked like it was meant to be! It was just aimed at the whole thread really, because some people (I am not going to start mentioning any names, but yours wasn't included!) have been extremely rude and dismissive about other people's reasons for doing a PhD and it just seems to me that there is no point in doing this...we are all different and have different needs, motivations etc, so why should we be slating each other?!

Really sorry if it looked like I was getting at you- I didnt mean it in that way at all!

KB

Hmmm tricky! There are several things to consider I guess. Firstly, the funding- funding is hard to come by, so think about how likely you are to obtain funding for the other university. It would be a shame to turn down the funded place and then not find funding for the other place...you would probably be kicking yourself for a long time if you turned down an offer and then ended up with no PhD! I assume you are happy with either project? Or is it for the same project? Make sure it is something you are enthusiastic about and you can spend 3-4 years of your life on! With respect to the university, I would be looking in the league tables for the specific department rankings rather than the overall university position. I moved from a top uni in the UK with a fairly well regarded department for my subject to an average uni in the UK with a top department in my subject- and I certainly don't regret it, even though friends etc questioned my move. You need to be with people at the top of their game in your specific area if you can, also bearing in mind that you need to get on with them and that you need to be sure they will provide you with adequate supervision etc- this is really important! Just realised you only had til the weekend to decide...so I might be a little late with that- sorry! Let us know what you decide! KB

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Well I appear to be very boring in my reasons for doing a PhD...I absolutely love my subject (I have several relatives who have suffered from Alzheimer's so if I am ever short on motivation I have it right there), I love writing and I find research exciting. I would love the rest of my career to be in research though I know it's a tough old world out there with respect to postdocs etc. I honestly don't know how people can put themselves through a PhD if they're not really enthusiastic about subject area, but we all have different motivations for doing all sorts of things in our lives- people have different reasons for going to the gym for example (to keep fit, to lose weight, to bulk up, to de-stress etc) but while we're there we all have something in common (we're exercising) and who is to say that one person's motivation for exercising is 'better' than another person's? It seems rather pointless slating other people's reasons for doing a PhD- we're all different and all arrive at our PhDs in different life circumstances and with different needs. So good luck to everyone doing a PhD. Whatever our reasons for doing a PhD we're all on a similar journey and we're all after the same end result to some extent- to finish our PhDs and hopefully be proud of the result! KB

I suspect that actually I have not been wrong twice in a row, but then neither of us can prove that right or wrong seeing as though it is rather subjective, so it's a bit of a pointless battle really!