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Perfectionism
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Hi Beave,

I've been reading this forum for a little while now, but this is my first ever post :-) Like you I was so relieved to find a bunch of people who seem to be sharing the same feelings as me.
Unfortunately I have no tips at the moment...I just wanted to say that I feel exactly the same as you in terms of inadequacy. The word 'fraud' rings particular bells with me. I keep thinking that I must have somehow tricked my supervisors into thinking I was good enough to do this (not sure how, my interview was terrible too!) and that they're slowly realising that I'm not cut out for it at all.
With me it's also complicated by the fact that I'm fresh out of uni at 21 and I haven't done a Master's. When I think about it logically I'm not even convinced that a masters would have helped me all that much with my specific topic, but every day a new 'crucial' text seems to pop up that I've never even heard of and I feel utterly unqualified to be doing what I am.
I think what you're saying is right; we need to stop focusing on being perfect and realise that we're 'good enough' for now. I also try to tell myself that there are a lot of advantages in being the way I am: I'm not a typical academic but this might help in relating to students once I (hopefully) start lecturing and maybe means I might even stand out from the crowd a little.
I was warned that doing this would be hard but I didn't really understand what that meant until I started. The hardest thing is not the volume of work but getting over these feelings of utter hopelessness!