To me that is just academic snobbery. The way funding gets handed out these days seems more to do with the 'applied value' of your research idea and how well you can communicate it on funding applications - a task in itself as the research has not yet started and you are not yet an expert in your area.

Even within my subject, I'd be reluctant to make a judgement on the value of someone else's research - they are far more qualified to assess this than me. It all comes down to the thesis and the viva - if you pass this and achieve your PhD, personally I'm not much bothered whether you paid or were paid to research. Funding is not an objective measure of how good your research idea is, it's just another thing to write on your CV if you get it.

To me that is just academic snobbery. The way funding gets handed out these days seems more to do with the 'applied value' of your research idea and how well you can communicate it on funding applications - a task in itself as the research has not yet started and you are not yet an expert in your area.

Even within my subject, I'd be reluctant to make a judgement on the value of someone else's research - they are far more qualified to assess this than me. It all comes down to the thesis and the viva - if you pass this and achieve your PhD, personally I'm not much bothered whether you paid or were paid to research. Funding is not an objective measure of how good your research idea is, it's just another thing to write on your CV if you get it.

Might be an idea to see what support you can get within your department. Is there anyone available as pastoral support? That would be your best bet - you could talk to them in confidence and they would know the situation in a bit more depth and what can be done to resolve it.

Hang in there. If I were you I'd keep records of what he's doing and saying - if he stops it might just be a case of having to ignore him or work around him, but don't let this compromise your PhD. Are you still going to counselling?

You should consider making an official complaint - and to keep doing this until he stops this behaviour or is removed from the group. Could be he's already in a bit of trouble if your supervisor has witnessed this behaviour and even apologised to you about it.

Hope it all works out for you!

I'd say go with the status quo. As long as you don't stand out from all the other lecturers/GTAs because of how you're dressed, that's fine. I think it really depends on what and where you're teaching - don't think I've ever seen any of the staff in my department wear anything other than jeans! :p

And speaking personally, I think there are much better ways to get respect from undergrads (I know because I still am one!). Always look like you have a strict plan for the seminar, always start on time, and direct questions to specific students not generally to the whole group - they'll be too scared of being put on the spot to think about what you're wearing. ;-)

First off, you need to go see your GP and get a referral to a psychologist. They should be able to help you.

Next, tell your supervisor what's going on. Even if you're not making a decision yet about whether or not to start in October, they need to know what is going on. You might be able to postpone the start of the PhD, or your supervisor could suggest some other way to accomodate you.

Personally I think it is better to postpone for a year or re-apply somewhere else than to start and risk your mental health. Everyone gets worried and anxious from time to time, but what you're describing sounds more like an anxiety disorder to me - a good psychologist can really do a lot to help you with this so I would urge you to see one. Hope everything works out for you!