Star,

I agree with Rogue on this one.

Forget the female discrimination issue for a moment (even if it's there).

Is there anything you think you can do to improve your situation? Wd be v. interested to hear.

Well said Rogue.

I wish I gave a s**t about my previous PhD, but the truth is I didn't.

It's true, many people can overcome big odds if they are truly passionate about something.

Rogue says: “Some people thrive on overcoming serious pressure, tackling the bull by the horns so to speak.”

Indeed. I tried and tried to overcome the serious pressure by trying to let my work do the talking, but in that respect I failed. I couldn’t come up with something original, dynamic, cutting edge…. all in the space of 6 months…. so I was sacked.

I’m realising the pressure is really on in academia and if you don’t cut the mustard there is a good chance you’ll be fired.

It could be that you are a woman, but then again it could be due to your academic performance.

The thing is, I was also hired for my PhD with a totally different background. And then when I started the PhD I was surrounded by students who specificially came from that particular background. So I totally felt out of my depth. While I was trying to catch up and learn basics, they were racing ahead of me.

On top of that I had a supervisor who started criticising me after 2 – 3 months of starting the PhD… and that was the start of my decline.

However, I always ask: why the heck did my supervisor not hire someone from the relevant background…? Why did he hire me and then not give me space to find my footing….

LOL!

Hi Tabea

For sure you'll be able to get another project if you want and no, you won't be known as the girl who quit forever... it's not your fault you were bullied ... and it's great that your college recognises this.

I say this from experience because I was forced to quit a PhD and then I was subsequently offered another fully funded position. I did not accept it (because I decided I didn't like the subject enough) but I am looking for another PhD position now. It didn't deter me either.

I can sympathise because I know what it's like to be bullied by a supervisor.

This all happened to me 5 months ago and since then I have done some temping jobs to keep money coming in, but now I’m a bit stuck as to what to do next.

I’m looking for both jobs and PhDs. I’ve found one PhD that I’m interested in, but it’s self-funded which is a bit of a shame. However, I really like the subject and before I’m even thinking of applying I’m doing some of my own research on it.

Effectively I’ve taken a break since this happened and my self-confidence has started to come back now. I spent some time with family and although I’m constantly worrying about what I’m going to do next, I feel much more confident than I did a few months back. And my situation doesn’t seem so bad now.

Aww, Rjb, big hug ((((((((((((Rjb))))))))))))))

So you got another supervisor to supervise you on that same project and now you don’t know whether to stay or whether to take the high road….?

LOLOL!!! Dad's are great aren't they

I think it was Rogue that said earlier, disagreements between student and supervisor are common. But when you’re in it your confidence sure takes a big knock.

Also, in his final damning letter to me he copied in the director of undergraduate studies and other significant people in the college, so he effectively black-marked my name.

HOWEVER. However. It’s actions that count. The college swiftly worked to relocate me onto another PhD.

You see there would have been two ways the college could have dealt with this case: 1) by agreeing with the supervisor and the accusations made against the student hence ejecting the student from the course and never allowing them in the college again OR
2) By realising that this was in fact a disagreement between two parties and that the student needs help with finding a new project and supervisor within the college.

If they had taken option 1) I was getting ready to defend my name. But since they took option 2) it looks like I wasn’t all that bad after all.

Wow rjb… thank you for sharing your story… it is very similar to mine.

You say you have found a supervisor “..willing to take me on”.

That’s exactly how I felt at the beginning. This all happened to me 5 months ago. They offered me another PhD straight after my supervisor forced me to quit and at the time I felt like a “hot potato”, that is that they weren’t offering me the new PhD on merit, rather because I was a liability and it was something they had to do. But later I realised that this was actually only existent in my mind because my confidence was so low.

I can tell you that at the time I wanted to sue my supevisor’s ass. I envisaged going to the top newspapers and hiring a lawyer because I knew I had a case. I could see the headlines now “top university at centre of bullying allegations”. The allegations my supervisor made against me made me want to puke because he was half responsible. If he had worked with me properly none of it would have happened.

My dad is very charming… (NOT) but the idea of having an acadmic post at the end of a PhD does drive my motivation for doing it in the first place. I know, I’ve seen the statistics. And no, I’m not deterred by them. But then again, I haven’t started yet. I may still change my mind….

“If you knew that you wouldn't get a lecturing position after the PhD, would you still do it?”

Putting it like that, the answer would be no. But I like to take things as they come. Many things can happen in three years – different opportunities can arise, you can’t predict what will happen to your health, your family, etc. I like to take each day as it comes and not speculate too far like that. But yes, I dream of an academic job and I haven’t even started my second PhD yet, hee hee (qv. the thread “I was forced to quit my PhD by both my supervisors”).

My dad recently told me “stay in that field. This field is going to be taking off in the future. Then you can sit in a nice comfy chair in your own office and fart, just like I do”. (He is 70 now and is still working… he took the industry route).

Corinne, reading your story one particular line rang very true with me when you said “Things like this help your self-esteem enormously and also give you sense of purpose and self-motivation”.

Exactly… don’t academics know this already???

I must say though, I’m not sure how I would feel if I was an academic and took on a bright, young PhD student…. maybe I’d feel slightly threatened too.

But still, bullying is in no way acceptable. I totally understand if no words of encouragement are uttered, I could live with that, but bullying, scheming and undermining are no-no’s. It’s an abuse of power. It’s wrong.