Signup date: 12 Jan 2013 at 9:50pm
Last login: 20 Feb 2016 at 5:45pm
Post count: 17
Hello, I've used the forum some time but haven't posted before. I hope you don't mind me asking for advice.
I'm halfway through my PhD & have had a little crush on my supervisor for the majority of this time. I'm not sure how he feels about me. Sometimes I think he finds me quite boring as I'm very shy, & he makes comments about me being very controlled, saying he can't tell how I'm feeling.Whilst he's professional & wouldn't behave inappropriately, he says he feels protective towards me, often asks about my boyfriend & even questions our relationship, plus he has warned me to be wary of other professors at conferences who might take advantage of 'attractive young women'. I'm admittedly very 'innocent' & I'm aware that older men can find this attractive, although he might simply be looking out for me.
I am quite an autonomous worker so don't arrange supervisory meetings often however he very regularly tries to involve me in his projects, and asked me to teach on his unit so we often spend a lot of time together. I often ask to meet with other female staff for coffee/lunch and to discuss my project with them, however for some reason I feel uncomfortable asking him to do the same even though it might be useful to have this time for informal PhD chat. I'm not sure if I feel uncomfortable because I have feelings for him, because I think he knows I have feelings for him, because I think he might have feelings for me, or because I'm worried that people might get the wrong impression if we spend too much time together socially.
I'm not planning to act on this & suspect my feelings are partly rooted in admiration, however I wonder how others might interpret this situation? Do you think his behaviour suggests feelings towards me? Not knowing where I stand is making me feel more awkward than ever!
(He is late 40s/early 50s and single, I recently turned 23)
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