No Simo - you misunderstand me completely. I think that some posters may have that mentality because I have met it many, many times.

While I lived there there was a newspaper report of a white man 'reduced' to sweeping the leaves in the park. There was a general outcry from the white community that such a thing could not be allowed - it was a disgrace for the white community and he was immediately offered several jobs.

This is the kind of mentality that has bred this idea that in the west you only have to ask and it will be given. And I think this is where *some* of these posts are coming from.

I also have a lot of family from Pakistan who are international grad students - but that's a different country and awareness of western procedures and education is much greater. You can't really generalise about international students but for the sake of those who are genuinely out in the twilight zone, I would council patience.

Well the media access is VERY limited. It does nothin in it's choice of programmin (upstairs downstiars, eldorado, nanny) to interfere with this image. But most importantly - this is how the white people in Africa live - especially some countries. Remember that e.g. after WW2 white Zimbabweans had the highest standard of living in the world by far - where even quite ordinary jobs got you a luxary bungalow, pool and servants. There really is a feeling that in the west you can get what ever you want and there is no struggle - no poverty - no financial worries at all.

For example - when I was in Zimbabwe one of my colleagues (with a good science degree) commented that all pop group/artists in the west were millionaires. I tried to explain that this isn't trur - a lot of people are less or not very successful but he would not believe me. And in general, people thought that westerners could get what ever they wanted - a nice house, a good job - so why not a PhD? And why might they think this?

I have been thinking about this thread a lot while having my dinner. I do often thik about this issue when I see these train-wreck threads but it is not quick and simple thing to try and explain my thinking.

There is a very big difference in information and cultural understanding across different countries. I worked have worked in 6 African countries and they vary a lot. I think it is very hard to understand and very hard to explain the misconceptions people routinely have about how easy it is for white europeans to do things.

Well people can't really win here as I think they don't know what else to say about what we're doing but want to show some interest. It's the same when you are pregnant - people constantly ask when it's due and by the end you cannot stand it. Hmm and there's that same escalating feeling of wanting to get it over with but then worrying about what will come next....

I stopped eating sadza because I think it is addictive! It creates such a big lump in the belly that people can't feel satisfied unless it is part of a meal.

Totally can't tremember about college deadlines.

Is there any way you can put off meeting him again until you have a clear answer?

Well I think it's very unreasonable for your supervisor to expect first authorship and I am surprised that your uni expects it. It was stressed to me that it is important for my furture career that I get first authorship and have some sole author papers (sole authorship being very unrealistic in some e.g. lab fields). If this is a standard policy for everyone though you may have a hard time fighting it. I would get advice from your graduate tutor (you should have one - although I could never figure out who mine was until this year).

It's generally understood that the head of the lab/team/whatever goes last in authorship and the person who actually did all the actual work goes first. I ecpect I will put my supervisor on papers that he has not had input on - but hopefully not all of them (hahahaha - always supposing I have this heap of pepers to publish!!!).

I agree that it is better not to post than post in irritation, and I do try to be helpful if I think I can.

However - Badhaircut totally nailed the feelings generated by some of these posts.

Well it's not rare but there are degrees to this problem - from mild to serious. I certainly don't hate my supervisor - he's quite pleasant. I just don't get any supervision which can be frustrating and isolating.

I previously dropped out of a PhD after my first year but in that case my supervisors were OK but there were other problems.

You are wise to talk to other students and get some feedback. If students regularly have problems with particular supervisors then that will be common knowledge in the dept and worth knowing.

Do you need a reference from your supervisor? I published my MPhil as sole author - but that was with my supervisor's blessing after he made it clear he does not expect to be co-author on all his students' papers. You should have a frank discussion with your supervisor and get this issue out in the open so as not to cause ill-feeling later.

No masters - it's common to go straight from 2i to PhD without a masters - especially in science. A masters can make you more competitive though and is becoming more necessary for some subjects - espeically those with especially competitve funding.

Golf - according to this report:

http://www.prospects.ac.uk/cms/ShowPage/Home_page/Your_PhD____what_next_/The_job_market_for_PhDs/p!eadeXb

48% of PhDs go on to work in education - teaching or postdocs.

Jouri - getting through without going bonkers is definitely the Big Goal.

I am really astonished that you can get a studio flat for 550/month in greater London - you certainly couldn't here. If that's the case - the why not?

I enjoyed sharing houses - I don't particularly like living on my own.