Just read the bit that the supervisor that left was the head of department. There should be a new person taking on that role. Or a head of PG studies.

You're getting nowhere contacting your supervisor - you've been trying for ages. You need to find a new contact person.

Good luck.

Hey Mlis, sorry to hear that things are still so tough for you. I agree with the others- you really need to go above your supervisor's head now. You have given her every chance to respond and to be helpful, and are not getting anywhere, so I think it's time to ask someone higher up for support. Is there no other 'pastoral support' PhD person who can help you too? We have a member of our staff that is there to deal with issues like this and it provides you with someone to speak to you about your studies and also how things are affecting you at the moment. In addition, what about your chairperson? We are always told that they are the person to see if there are issues with the supervisor. I wouldn't give up on the counselling thing either- sounds like you had a really awful time with the first one and I don't blame you for not wanting to go back! But the university service might be more used to dealing with issues like this and might therefore be more understanding- I have been going to my uni counsellor for 6 years now and she has been fantastic. Good luck with it all, KB

Mlis you've had such a rough time, please don't beat yourself up for not being able to "snap out of it". Some counselling qualifications really aren't worth the paper they're written on, and it sounds like your one didn't have a clue about depression. The number of half-baked people masquerading as therapists really makes me angry. If it helps to know you're not alone, I went to my new GP a few years back because my anxiety had gotten to the point I could barely function, I explained my history (serious mental health problems, long term hospitalization, etc) and she simply brushed my symptoms off as those of a silly girl who needed more to occupy her mind!

I think the others are right, the University is totally shirking its responsiblities right now and you should be getting a lot more from them. If you don't have a third party monitor of some sort then find out who is the new head of department and ask for a meeting with them. Take your doctors letter, the emails you've sent to your primary sup and explain that your secondary was never replaced. They don't have to attack your primary sup, but they should help you put together a plan for your return to studies, one that will get both you and the department the completion you want. In this case a new member of staff might actually be a good thing as you can make a fresh start. I know this must be really hard for you but don't give up, and try to take things one step at a time without panicking yourself over every ramification.

======= Date Modified 02 Feb 2010 11:55:07 =======
With therapy I think you really need to "shop around" and try a few until you find one that has the right approach for you. Sadly that means meeting people like the one you had - that approach may have worked for someone else, but not you, and they should have adjusted it accordingly.

The Uni counselling service at my Uni deals with depressed student constantly, ones who have taken time out, postgrad and undergrad...they will support you and be able to give you some details of who to contact to get back in, and also support you as you do get back into everything.

Do you have a Registry or central admin office? There will be several layers dealing with postgrads - obviously the supervisors, the head of school, someone in charge of research within the school, and a few people in the central office admining and overseeing it all. Forget your supervisor, you need to go higher. It may be that you need to be allocated a new one - this might not be a bad thing from the sounds of it. Either contact the central office, or the new head of school. All this information must be available on the uni website, surely?

I think it's very easy for PG students to fall through the cracks. It's the worst thing to have to try and do when you're depressed, but you need to try and fight a bit more if this is what you want to do. Be a bit more pushy and argumentative, and who cares what other people might be thinking. This is about you, not them, and it's too important to you to let them push you out. Even if you can find someone to draft the letters/emails for you and you send them in your name, so you're not having to really face and think about the actual arguments.

Edit: I should also say no-one hates you. You're a victim of the apathy that is prevalent in academia with a lot of lecturers. Because you're not right there physically asking them these questions, you're all too easy to put to the back of the queue. It won't be anything personal - honestly, I get exactly the same thing and I work in the department! Certain people will not respond to me until I am literally beating down their door and they have no choice. So don't think it's you and your depression.

Thanks for the supportive replies. I tried emailing my supervisor one more time, saying I hope she receives my email and isn't absent or anything, and if I don't receive a reply I'll contact the dean to check that she isn't off sick or something. She replied almost immediately! Which proves that she WAS receiving my emails, she was just ignoring them :-(

She completely ignored everything I wrote about my work and wanting her to read drafts etc, and in relation to me hoping for an extension or returning part-time she just said "Jane is the admin person in charge of research students; you will need to contact her and will probably have to complete some paperwork". So I contacted the admin lady and I'm still waiting for a reply, but now I feel even more like my supervisor is just washing her hands of me and doing the bare minimum.

I can't get a new supervisor because nobody else is close enough to my specific field to be able to advise me; it's a small department and the only other suitable person is the second supervisor who left. My remaining supervisor said that with mere months remaining on my PhD they wouldn't allocate me a new supervisor, particularly because there's nobody else who's suitable, so unfortunately we're stuck with each other for the duration. I imagine that my remaining supervisor is now in charge of the research group, since it was composed of only two professors (one of whom left), five research students (three of whom graduated before the other professor left, leaving myself and another girl being supervised by the remaining professor), and a few part-time researchers. The most I would get is a second token supervisor from another research group, which might help a bit, I don't know.

My doctor explained that the modern approach to counselling emphasises that discussing the patient's problems just encourages them to think/worry about them more, and the patient needs to STOP the cycle of thinking about their problems and use fresh air/sleep/exercise/drugs to address the chemical imbalances causing the depression. I agree that doing these things is a positive step, but I can't see how it could completely fix the problem if the patient is still worrying over the same issues and perpetuating the cycle of depression. I think there needs to also be something like CBT to help the patient think about their problems in a more positive way, and to help them take positive steps to fix those problems.

I asked my doctor for some proper treatment, maybe CBT, and she refused - she said that in her opinion my depression would lift once the university gave me an extension and I got some of the thesis completed etc, because I'd be less worried, and therefore she was declining all treatment unless my symptoms still persist after all that stuff is sorted out. I'm seriously considering seeing a different doctor, because I've been depressed for almost two years now (absent from university for one year) and she's still refusing proper treatment and saying my depression will just lift of its own accord!

Well done for keeping going! Keep copies of those emails Mlis, youre supervisor is clearly shirking and she knows it. Regarding appointing a second, even a less relevant supervisor or one at a different site would at least give you someone to go to and who could read drafts for general style and so on, I'd say grab whatever you can get (you can always ignore them if you feel they don't know enough).

I think you should go to a second GP about the depression, it's not their specialist subject and I've had more than one utterly useless response myself (usually involving a course that meant them doing nothing, funnily enough). While I have seen people focus too much on their problems (and hence be unable to move on), the fact is that you sometimes need to work through things and learn new coping skills in order to break a pattern. We're not talking about someone who's had ten years of psychoanalysis and simply doesn't want to leave the comfort of the couch, you're genuinely struggling. CBT can be very useful for re-structuring your thinking and for learning new coping skills, and I think you need some support to get through the next few months, did you find out if your uni had a service you could access?

I think a lot of this "just get on with it" stuff is a backlash against the massive over-prescription of prozac and co in earlier years, doctors got the balance wrong then and they've careered to the other extreme now.

Hey Mlis, you should def go see someone else about the depression. You could ask your surgery if there are any GPs there who have a special interest or experience in mental health- a pal of mine did that and ended up with someone much more suitable than her normal GP. Unfortunately most GPs have little training in mental health, and like the rest of the population, they can be incredibly ignorant about its causes and effects etc. I too have experienced this first hand, and even had to argue the toss with a GP for my prescriptions very recently- in the end I had to ask my consultant to write to him and put him in his place as he was refusing to prescribe me my medication! I think there are two kinds of depression, and this causes problems in the medical profession. Lots of people experience a reactive depression after a negative event, which can be quite a normal (although unpleasant) reaction in the circumstances, whereas other people have a more endogenous depression that is purely biological and not necessarily triggered by anything. The main problem a few years ago was that people whose depression was thought to be 'normal' in the circumstances (e.g. bereavement, job loss etc) were given pills when the depression wasn't necessarily arising from a purely biological cause, and some other sort of therapy would have been more appropriate, such as counselling/psychotherapy etc. And now they've gone the other way and are reluctant to prescribe medication even when it's clear that a person's depression is beyond a 'normal' reaction to circumstances, or isn't triggered by a negative event at all. I would definitely go see another doctor and explain how bad things are and that you don't feel that you are being taken seriously...it's impossible to keep going like this and you need some help! Find a doctor who listens to you and stick with them, there are some good ones out there! Good luck with it, KB

Hi Mlis, I'm concerned about the way both your doctor and supervisor are approaching your issues. I do think you might want to see a different doctor. In the meantime, if you want CBT, I can suggest an online program that my uni has put together which helps the depress-ee (you, and me too!) walk through some CBT steps and try to rearrange thinking. It's free, and you can save where you're up to after each module, then come back to it later. It's here: http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome The reason I suggest it is not because I happen to go to ANU (I'm in a totally different area anyway!) but because I've suffered from mild to severe depression for most of my life, and the program was helpful to me. :-) I hope it can help you too.

Second, I think you need to front up in person to your supervisor and get things sorted. If you apply for an extension (which you definitely should) I believe your sup will need to support it. She can't ignore you like she can your emails, if you turn up at her door demanding a straight reply. If she doesn't want to supervise you anymore, and you do get an extension, then there is time to find a new, supportive supervisor. Just because you have a speciality doesn't mean you can't get someone else - my area is highly specialised and my supervisor's area is only tangentially related, but this doesn't negate his help and suggestions.

Keep on keeping on, and make sure you're healthy again before jumping back into the stress of the PhD. (up) As a sufferer myself, I've found that being proactive and facing fears DOES help, even if you don't get the result you were best hoping for. Good luck!

======= Date Modified 10 May 2010 13:58:08 =======
============= Edited by a Moderator =============
Feel good that your fiance has dumped you or abandoned for that matter...
Thank goodness that at least you have come to know about his nature now.
Don't worry about that dear, you deserve a good life. Flush out all the past bitter memories and think about your future. Have confidence in you, you can make every possible things.
All the best!!!