You can do it - and you will do it, your hormones are crazy at the moment and coupled with her poorly worded advice she has made things worse. BUT She could have said nothing, let you take on the job and fall on your bum. In her own way, I think she cares.
Hope some/ any of this helps x

Thanks AcademicMum! I am always open to hearing another opinion, and perhaps you are right. We've already set up some childcare at home for me to finish off the last bit - the whole situation is somewhat eased by my husband working from home most days.

What suprises me really is the lack of proffesionalism - she does have a reputation for having very low tolerance for families, so perhaps I shouldn't be suprised. I think this all harks back to the one thing that REALLY riles me - these people have no management or people skills, and yet are happy to be managers. She's usually a completely nice person, but she's just terrible for bullying when in a bad mood. Anyway, I'm writing today and happy to be at home, away from her prowl!

I did my MA whilst pregnant with twins and completed my dissertation for it when my boys were about 6 weeks old. It was difficult but NOT impossible. I was lucky to not have to take on another job at the time but did have three other children and a house to run. As long as you and hubby are working together you can complete. I am now 2nd year of phd with the twins being just 2 and although sometimes difficult it can be done. Don't take her literally just prove her wrong!!!

I have small children and my PhD was completely self funded - no financial help at all- consequently I had to work. Do what you have to do, no need to even consider the opinions of people who have a somewhat naiive view on life. The very best of luck to you, I know exactly what your going through. I think you seem to have your life well sorted!!

Just wondering if there is the provision for paid maternity leave that some PhD students seem to get. I knew one RA/PhD student (part time) had 6 months paid maternity leave and a break from her PhD while she had her child. Or are there any hardship funds available etc that you could acccess.

I personally think the lack of support of maternity in PhD students is a human rights issue.

God, don't even get me started on maternity rights, lol! No, I get zilch. We investigated this so thoroughly, mostly in disbelief, and it culminated with the guy at Citizens Advice Beureau saying "this is disgraceful. You don't exist in the eyes of the uni or the government". Yeah, I REALLY believe it's a human rights issue! I am looking at hardship funds from the uni, filled in all the necessaries but it takes so long to gather together the 'evidence' - all in progress. I have also registered self-employed and back dated NI, in view of the fact that I have been teaching an A level student in the evening. Trying my best to not panic!

I am so glad I found this forum. I am blessed (sarcasm intended) with one of those lovely advisors too who seems to think the PhD is the be all and end all of life. We all committed to this career and it was a choice we made. However, that does not mean that we are robots who have lost touch with reality. We have families (who I am forced to ignore!!!!!). We are not robots and that's how it seems our advisors treat us sometimes. I spend every waking hour of my day studying. How healthy can that be? And are we really productive? I am not a complainer, but I just have one life. And while I treasure scholarship, I am not about to let me be defined by the number of books I have read or the number of papers I have written!!! You wanna judge me... Go ahead. I have no qualms about admitting the truth... I am just human and refuse to become anything else.....

There is also a rare breed of supervisors who think that PhD is about how successfully you tie a knot between strings(off the shelf) of already proven work rather than going into indepth investigation what actually those strings do....or for what purpose they were made or what are their chemical composition. Quantity rather than Quality. I been blessed with an Exception.:-x

Zweena,

My comment would be:

a) it's not your supervisor's business to ask you to choose between this and the PhD;
b) "you'll not complete the PhD" -- was your supervisor threatning you?
c) your husband should be more supportive! -- you family is none of the supervisor's business.

All in all, the supervisor's comments are offensive!

Zweena..Take no notice, i know many PhD students who were pregnant half way through the PhD and are now just about finishing off. PhD does not mean we can not have a life other than that!

8 hours a week is practically like working one day a week, i can not see how that is going to effect your PhD.

I think this has been resurrected from the past hasn't it - I think zweena must have a 2 and a half year old now and has probably finished her PhD and kicked her sup to the curb!

hehehehehe... thats soo funny.. how come we didnt notice it was 3 years old this thread...looool

Oh my God, i wonder what happened to Zweena ? it would be really exciting like a movie story or something if she poped back in and told us what happend to her ? :p

she only posted 9 times, so I expect she's long forgotten posting it! Oh well I am sure she lived happily ever after!