conversation carried on. then my friend said, " not everyone will have achieved what you have by 25 and therefore see things like you do." that was so unprovoked!!! just because i gave a view on an issue i was suddenly the subject of attack not because of the view, but because of who i am.

anyhow, i've come to realise that people don't get you when you're a PhD student. they are intimidated by you. people who used to friends become your worst critics... only few friends actually stay friends. time to focus on my work and close my life to, 'friends'. i now understand why academics hang out together. some people in this world are just too shallow.

Jojo, i cant believe he said that to you! boring!! what a jerk! how can you be boring. your putting your blood sweat and tears into this doctorate!!

they make movies about exciting research etc. not about people who do boring 9-5 jobs!!

yah people who are not in the "phd" world, they just dont get it. and will never get it.
and only few friends outside the phd world, will understand.

i am lucky that most of my friends are fellow phd students. one of my best friends just recently finished her phd.
my other two best friends even though they are non-phd. they understand the stress of my phd. others dont so i just stay out of their way.

you keep going jojo, when this is over and done with, you can then do all the things you wanted to do!

i'll keep you company today! starting on a brand new chapter today. will be stuck in my study room all day.

good luck with your work! keep it up, you're doing so great.

i consider a person who is boring, a person that does absolutely NOTHING.

you're doing something. you're working hard. which is to be admired.

thanks Lara. you put a smile on my face. at least someone out there gets me.

otherwise, am just tucked in this book. it's great to know am not the only one in the world studying.

Hey Jojo,
Sorry to hear about your friends bringing you down...that guy sounds like a right muppet! A few weeks ago a friend asked me how things were going and I gave an honest answer that I was having a few problems. The response was "well you chose to do a phd so deal with it". Funnily I haven't phoned her since then! Phd seems to show who the friends you can rely on are, and who is just around for the good times. Equally it shows the positives of the good friends, which is far more important.
Hope the library is giving you the answers you need today...good lluck

hey Jojo good luck with your work today.

thanks Lara! Cakegirl - i totally emphathise. don't worry, you have us - you don't NEED them. put it all in perspective. true - through this process we know who our real friends are.

working away now - doing summaries all day. hopefully i'll finish and incorporate them into my chapters.

am incorporating the summaries now. i feel numb. just read through page 1 of the chapter am writing and thought, if i had an option i would be out there in the park!

anyhow, am taking a cup of tea and typing away. i want to see if after forcing myself i can actually meet my 9th June deadline.

you can do it Jojo!! you have been working away steadily!! hang in there. i know about the numbness, and the nochalent feelings.. we just gotta push through the pain barrier. and then when you have met your deadline, make sure you treat yourself with a reward, of taking a day or days off..

i will stay up with you. i need to do alot on my chapter. it's going to be an all nighter for me!

although i am taking a break at 10pm, to watch supernatural..

you've really impressed me Jojo, you've really have worked so hard these past few weeks. of reading your diary.

thanks Lara. i've actually had a flip through myself. not bad at all. i noticed i got lazy on the times. so i'll remedy that.

today i worked from about 3pm and am still at it. will clock out later.

the going is tough, but worth every moment, especially when you see a chapter growing.

you know that feeling when you know that you are writing the original part of your thesis, am enjoying that right now.

off for a cuppa.

Good luck tonight Jojo...stick at it. Nearly there...

wow Lara! an allnighter? i remember doing a few after i failed my first year upgrade. i hated those moments. i'll probably clock out at around 2pm, my new sleeping time, and try my hardest to be up by 8am tomorrow for final polishing before i send off this draft to my supervisor. my supervisor will not be happy that am bombarding him with work, but anyway, that's what he's there for. after that am gonna focus on finishing publications 2 and 3 which i have put off for a while. am really looking forward to that, because they are in my broader research area and so i'll have a break from thinking about my thesis. if only for a week or so.

thanks Cakegirl.