Hi Teek, I think it's down to a relationship between our human capacity for denial, and fabrication, and the way we live our lives: we don't lsten to ourselves or eachother nearly enough, and can tell ourselves it doesn't matter and that other things matter more instead, so we don't even know we're not listening and don't deal with the most important aspects of our lives: birth, death, love, spirituality with any real conviction or commitment. Things build up and we construct narratives of denial around our lives and relationships, that make things work in the short term, but are ultimately destructive.

I've thought about this a lot, there are some quite serious mental health problems in my family, but, looking those who do and don't suffer in this way, in my family anyhow, I really don't think it's genetic, more down to experience and personal narratives. I've been through quite a lot of 're-programming', as I see it, myself and have found it most beneficial.

I've looked at the Freud book, he's important for my PhD, in fact, that big idea is pretty key, yeah, I think he has a really good point.

Just thought I'd share this, it's a novel by Sebastian Faulks called Human Traces, and there is a lot of psychiatry stuff in it and quite a bit on the theory that evolution has indirectly led to mental illness. It's not the most scientifically sound book or course being a fictional novel, but I thought it was an interesting introduction to the idea. The only work I've done on Freud and Jung was in 6th year in school and I really enjoyed it, but haven't actually studied it in any great detail. Could be something in it though!
I hope you're starting to feel better about things Teek :-)

Hi everyone

I saw the psych doctor today. On the plus side he was ridiculously nice and friendly and seems to have more resources at his disposal than I've seen elsewhere. We agreed a medication to try and weekly contact until they have space for formal therapy and can dig up my extensive notes for a firmer diagnosis. The service was much more friendly and humane than i'd experienced before, gives you a bit more faith in society's treatment on mental illness :-)
He didn't really tell me anything new, just debated the various labels I'd already been aware of and pretty much let me decide the medication based on past events. But I trust him that he wants to get more information and move forwards rather than just tick a box and get me off his books. It's been a rocky day and I'm exhausted, but I did feel better just for honestly telling someone what was going on in my head.
Did have a very cringe-worthy moment though. During our session his phone rang, and it was one of those mobiles that says aloud the name of the caller as it rings. It only kept repeating the name of the psychiatrist I work with (who turns out to be this guy's boss) :$ I know I shouldn't care but I really hope he never discusses my case with him, it's just too close for comfort.

That aside, thanks to all of you for your kindness and support, I hope that all those who were also struggling are finding a way through.

Really chuffed it's gone well for you, Teek. You'll soon be completely on top of things again. Have to say though, I'm not surprised that the guy who rang the consultants phone was connected to you both in some way. It's all to do with the Six Degrees of Separation. So, I don't like to brag about these things, but I know someone who knows someone x 10E6 who knows Sylvester Stallone. What's more, so do you and everyone else. Best wishes.

Hey Teek, really glad to hear it went well and you feel as though you're being listened to properly. Hopefully you'll soon be feeling a bit more chirpy! I know what you mean about the whole 'connection' thing- I recruit my participants from the local psychiatric unit which is the same one I see my consultant at and have been an inpatient in. I'm always dreading that the psychiatrist that helps me out with recruitment will twig that I'm a patient there, but it hasn't happened yet! Some of my participants are also under the same psych as me, which is a bit weird...oh well. Long as I'm feeling well I don't mind! Fingers crossed that you start feeling better soon, glad it went well for you! Best, KB

Teek:

Sorry to hear that and hope you are better now!

ICE CREAM, YOGA, MUSIC, FUNNY MOVIES? Any things that make you happy :)

Take care!

Thanks Jun :-)

I had a few hideous days of side effects from the new drug but that seems to be settling down now. And I actually do use yoga, especially helps with the anxiety.

*goes off to do a rebalancing shoulder stand*

Glad to hear things are settling down Teek and things are looking up. Been thinking of you and really hope life just gets better and better for you.