Signup date: 03 Aug 2010 at 6:26pm
Last login: 05 Mar 2015 at 6:30pm
Post count: 310
======= Date Modified 16 Sep 2010 02:33:28 =======
Sorry - I don't know the answer to your question, but I would simply contact DWP and apply. They'll soon tell you if you're ineligible. If there is anyway that you can get a sick note, it might be worth doing so; Incapacity benefits (if such a benefit still exists or its equivalent) would probably be less tricky, but you would most definitely require a sick note. Otherwise, you will probably have to apply for JSA, which is far from ideal if you don't intend to search for work. They will probably (definitely for JSA) ask what you did before and request a letter from your uni confirming that you no longer attend. As you haven't officially left, this might cause problems. Also, your savings could preclude any entitlement to benefits (if you tell them about that bank account). I suppose it could be tricky as, from the perspective of the DWP, there might not be enough people in this situation for them to have an adequate procedure in place. Still, I would definitely apply - there's no harm in trying. And if you intend to apply, the sooner the better; they won't backdate JSA.
Good luck (up)
That really sucks :-(
Try to relax though - you've gone straight to worst case scenario, which (whilst understandable) is hardly likely. You're very unlikely to receive a ban if it's your first offence, and even IF you do, it's unlikely to be for longer than 28 days. You'll probably get points and a fine, but they may be lenient on you given your explanation providing it is your first offence.
I hope it goes well for you (mince)
======= Date Modified 16 Sep 2010 01:40:48 =======
My husband suffers with anxiety. Well, not so much now. More often than not it's not much of an issue, but it's always there threatening his happiness. He was crippled with it at one point though. He found psychotherapy very helpful too, but it didn't fix the problem. He also had other types of therapy and medication but none of that made any difference. Ultimately, it improved with time and age (he's 33 now).
Does your lack of past relationships have anything to do with your anxiety? I know there's no shortage of ways in which a person can be affected by anxiety, but my husband really struggled in this area (until he met me of course ;-) ). Well, actually it was a massive issue for the first couple of years of our relationship; we almost didn't make it. Took a lot of perseverance on both our parts. In fact, he needs a lot of perseverance to succeed in many, many things that others wouldn't struggle with.
P.S. I, for one, am envious of your pub quiz skills - I suck to an embarrassing extent :$
P.P.S. You don't seem mediocre to me! (And not just because of the pub quiz thing.) Not many people would describe themselves as generally mediocre. Work on that :-)
As far as I'm aware, it isn't essential to have a Masters before doing a PhD - it depends on whether or not your prospective uni would be satisfied without one. Find a prospective supervisor in your field and contact him/her. (The fields in which potential supervisors are interested and their contact details are usually on their university's website.)
Good luck with your search (up)
Thanks guys. I will certainly look into these alarm clocks, but I'm a little skeptical; I can happily sleep through the sun bursting through my open curtains no matter what time of the year it is. Maybe I was just built wrong! Still, I would love nothing more than to be one of those morning people, so it's certainly worth a try (up)
You seem lonely, and you're worried you'll stay that way. I might be over-stepping the line and over-simplifying your difficulties but it seems you're missing a partner - someone to add some excitement to your life, to share your problems with, and, most importantly, someone with whom you can see a settled future.
You're a similar age to me - I didn't do my first degree until my mid-twenties. But I don't feel the way you do. Until I attended uni, I was stuck in a rut. I felt left behind and as though I was a failure. But that all stopped when I discovered what I wanted to do with my life and took steps towards getting there. I suppose the difference between you and me now is that I have a husband and a house - I got both during my undergraduate years. It's important to have a life besides academic ambitions - the two aren't exclusive.
You're doing a PhD, which is a great thing. But it's not everything. Of course you want more for your future. The good news is you're not so far behind at all. You're very young. Life can change very quickly!
I suggest a dating site! Now, I know people can sometimes scoff at those who use these sites, but I know two people getting married in the next year to someone they met through an internet dating site. These are really nice, successful, attractive people and I was really surprised when I discovered how they met their partners. One of them (a very attractive, 28-year-old, home-owning, successful woman) explained that she felt she simply couldn't find a suitable partner in her own little circle, so she gave it a try. She found a wonderful man!
It will certainly shake things up a bit. Think about it :-)
I'm doing an MRes, and intend to start a PhD (not started yet though). I never considered doing an MA - they seemed too much like my first degree. I wanted more independence and to research exactly what I wanted. I expect it will prepare me better for my PhD too.
How creative! Let me join in:
The fire stoked, the driver woken,
Hours of work await.
With deadlines that cannot be broken,
Sleep won't come 'til late.
As tiredness begins to irk,
In bed I should be tucked.
But I must work and work and work,
Or else I shall be...
Oh no! Leaving the house before 7am is my idea of hell! I feel silly complaining now :$
I am exactly the same when it comes to being wide awake at night. My eyes sting when I force myself out of bed in the morning, I am tired (hence unproductive) all day, but cannot sleep at night.
I work best at night - always have done. I resisted this practice at first and tried to be more productive during the day, but it's a struggle and never as fruitful. I was glad to find the nocturnal workers' thread and discover that there are many people who also prefer to work at night.
Problem is, I now have to get up at 8am five days a week for work. Now, I know people all over the world get up at 8am and earlier without complaint, so I realise I probably seem a little silly declaring it a problem. Just wondering whether those of you who are unable to work during your preferred hours have successfully managed to adhere to a new and productive pattern of working. If so, for the love of God tell me how!... please.
Jojo, it isn't rational or reasonable to feel insulted because a guy who likes you expresses some hope that you might like him too. You obviously are insulted, but that's not his fault. Your feelings of being insulted seem to be a consequence of being repulsed. Repulsion is a strong feeling, and you should not continue a 'friendship' (I use the term loosely) with someone who you feel repulsion for.
Re 'pity' vs 'feel sorry for': I pitied the heroin addict I once lived next door to; I felt sorry for her children. They aren't the same emotion. I would never consider a relationship which had its basis in either to be a friendship.
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