So Smoobles we can change the title of this thread.... ;-)

Yep, we'll just call it 'anyone doing a phd who has problems' ;-)

Agree... :-)

Wow. It sounds like there's a fairly different culture over there and I can see why you might want extra support. My boyfriend would never get away with leaving me to do all of the housework, and I don't think many of the other guys I know in the UK would either. Maybe the girls I know are just meaner.

Oh I have no problem at all with support threads for people in specific situations. Or even face to face peer support at unis. But I find the formal supervision of 'married women' as described in the opening post a combination of weird, patronising, and excluding. As I said, I think that unis and the academic community in general need to be more responsive to the fact that lots of people have a range of demanding life circumstances, and that shouldn't hinder academic/professional progress. To say 'hey look, we're sorting this problem by helping out the married women' takes a rather narrow view of what the wider issue is, and leaves other people who may need similar peer support out in the cold.

Anyhoo, I'd like to apologise for derailing a support thread. That wasn't really my intention. I just wanted to highlight that some formal measures that universities take to apparently address a problem can be detrimental in other ways that might not at first seem obvious. Overall, I think pigeon-holing people is a bad idea.

I've heard that us British men are well-trained when it comes to housework. Some of my foreign female friends have actually expressed disbelief at me cooking - that's not even cooking well, just cooking. Plus, my (American) girlfriend seems well-pleased with the amount I do around the house.