Hi Lostinoz,

I can't argue with your reason number 4 (fair enough), and I'm certainly NOT encouraging you to quit, but look...
- your parents will NOT commit suicide if you quit. Now if they're really into it, they might blame you or something, but it's a different story...  If it can console you a bit, mine would throw a massive party if I did quit. They think I look too good to waste my time studying and that I should focus on getting myself a rich husband, probably older too, and more clever so he's interested in me in the first place (you can't outshine a man, it's a well-known fact). I'm not kidding.
- your reason number 3 is typical of someone who is slightly depressed and needs a holiday! What does "better" mean to you?
- I disagree with your reason number 1. Quitting is very different from failing.

I think you need to try and get over it. Take a break perhaps? I'm quite serious - I'm not talking about staying home doing nothing, but you know, a weekend over at a good friend's or in a nice city you've always wanted to visit... I personally need a weekend away on every regular basis, I don't even wait for the blues to settle in. I'm going to York next, I hope before Christmas, then to Spain in February to see some friends, and probably to Cyprus with my family in March or April :)

Because I see you all doubting so much I think I'll write my own reasons though - in case I end up losing a bit my enthusiasm too at a point, it could be nice to come back to this:
1. I love my topic. It's the most fascinating topic in the world :p
2. I like research and, even if I'm not sure what will happen after the PhD, I want to enjoy the time I have ahead doing it.
3. The studentship pays more than my previous job.
4. I can't quite think of a job I'd do for more than two years apart from novelist, singer in a rock band... or academic. I find a PhD would be useful for career development in those three jobs.

Calling myself doctor is not a reason because I don't intend to stay in the UK all my life and, in my home country (and many others) you only get to call yourself that if you are a medical doctor. My family had quite a laugh when I told them ... making up stories about me writing prescriptions for a daily dose of Chaucer and so on...

-Flight upgrades
-Pref treatment at restaurants/hotels
-Cheaper insurance
-Leverage when making complaints

The feeling of going to talk to the snotty woman in an overpriced shop who last year said "I assume its Miss" (now married so more smug mwahahaha) and be able to reply - "well no actually, its Dr"

although will have to try and refrain from changing surname to Who, Death or Nik!

This is exactly the kind of ignoble aspiration I'm talking about. Perhaps this website will interest you http://www.lochaberhighlandestates.com . Much easier and cheaper.

I would hazard, as a rather educated guess (being as I am a Dr) that previous post was laced with irony. You snob!

ooh very tempting cleverclogs, although the idea of associating myself with Scotland would be pretty nasty for me, as I am definitely very English!

I am doing my PhD because:

A) I really don't know.
B) I just am.
C) It's a job, and a job is a job is a job - hours are a bit long though.
D) To see where doing a PhD will lead.
E) I do want the title and I'll use it until the novelty wears off - like any new toy.
F) Cheaper car insurance with the title? Count me in!
G) Preferential treatment by hotels and restaurants, without having to be an inbred member of royalty? Sounds like another reason.
H) I get paid to do it.
I)I get to work when I want and how I want - though things still need to get done within a reasonable time frame.
J)I've only got 1 more year left, so there's no point quitting now.
K)If I quit, what do I then do? I've done lots of crap jobs, and I've had all I can take and I can takes no more.

surely Wal, you would agree that enhancing your star status is probably a better pursuit albeit more time consuming

======= Date Modified 19 Nov 2009 14:52:58 =======
Lostinoz I agree with Nadia may be you need a break. Or at least some time to yourself to reflect on things and look at the big picture? I'm also sure you parents won't commit suicide if you quit. There are a million other things much much worse than quitting a PhD! Also if you do make up your mind that you don't want a PhD and quit now it doesn't make you a "failed" PhD student, just one that quit because you found that it's not for you. Everyday there are people who switch to another career path, you can't say a lawyer that decided to retrain as a plumber is a failed lawyer? Just a former lawyer that decided he/she would rather do something else with their life? Really even if you feel like a "failed" student when you leave, you'll soon get over it. In 5 or 10 years time you will look back and wonder why it was ever such a massive massive deal to you. This comes from my own experience. Before I started the PhD (and the MRes that I had to do as a condition of the funding) I once embarked on another MSc course in a fairly different subject (within the same board discipline I"m in now but the area was vastly different from my current research area. And it was a taught course, not a research course). I started that with the wrong reasons and ended up really, really hating it after a few months. It made me more depressed than I'd ever been and in the end I decided to quit and did something else with my life. But the decision wasn't easy. I felt like I should finish it for the sake of it, and feared I'd feel like a failed person for the rest of my life. But in the end I decided that I really didn't want to do that MSc so I did quit. And then life came back to me. Within a year I found that what I wanted to do was research, and with my now supervisor's help I found a topic that I found really interesting. And the rest is history. Now that I'm (reasonably) content with my life (or as content as you can be as a PhD student!), I looked back to that MSc-quitting episode as just an incident where I discovered more about myself, and learned that in the future I shall never make decision based only on the basis that it looks right on paper/objectively, but instead should follow my own interests. Before I made the decision to quit that MSc course I feared I'd be seen as a failed person by myself and others, but once I quit I just felt liberated. You can't control how others see you, but in my experience no one single person has said anything about failing when I told them about this "incident" in my life. May be some were just polite to say it, but honestly I can't care less. Because I'm happy (enough) now. I guess in a way it's probably like people getting a divorce. Getting a divorce is a lot better than sticking to someone that's not right for you, and it frees you to have a different life and meet someone else.

Sorry for the lengthy paragraph. But i feel that you probably really need to think about/write down the pros and cons and decide if you really want the PhD or not. Like when you read papers (or at least title and abstract) in your area do you get excited and want to find out more? etc And then see if you think the pros are good/plenty enough to worth the cons? If you do decide to do the PhD good luck with it but if not I'm sure your life won't be ruined just because you started but did not finish a PhD!

Oh dear my last post was so long that i think it must have exceeded the word limit as the last bit got cut off when published. ANyway here's the list of reasons why i'm doing a PhD:

1) I'm interested in my research topic - i would say this is probably the most important thing?
2) flexible working hours, and i can take whatever days off for holiday if i want (within reason of cos)
3) autonomy - essentially I'm my own boss (tho admittedly i'm not so great at that...)
4) I like the idea of research - people talking about ideas, trying to find answer to questions or coming up with new views/perspectives that other people haven't considered before
5) I enjoy making sense out of things, as in finding out "what does it all mean?" when doing lit review and analysing my data etc

I don't mind the title Dr but it's not why I'm doing a PhD. For all I know there could be another me in a parallel universe happily being a freelance investigative journalist (a job that also comes with the pros listed above?), without the title Dr (or prospect of getting it).

Also no i never wished I was a medical doctor, if I did I'd have studied medicine instead...

Here are my reasons:

1. I really enjoy the work and it might lead to me getting paid to do it. I love my subject and I love learning to write; I also feel I'm workking on something worthwhile and significant. Getting to do all this while being at home listening to Kate Bush is brill, a bit of that plus money would be fabulous.
2. It's the only way to get a permanent job in academia, and I like workng in academia.
3. I'm getting the chance to reach my potential, which is a very good thing.
4. You get to procrastinate with a better class of person.
5. My parents wouldn't commit suicide if I quit. (black joke born of recent bitter experiences)

Lostinoz, I too think you should consider whether or not this is the right path for you. Even if your parents got upset, they'd have to deal with it, they can't control your life forever. As I think Wally said earlier, yo have to bring some positivity to your PhD

lostinoz, please do realise that the PhD is literally a rollercoaster - ok so not literally but you know what I mean. I know that EVERYONE on this forum has had periods even years, when we have hated it, were depressed. But then theere are stages when its going well and everything is alright in the world.

Just thought I would draw your attention to the fact that we are not always so hunky dory!

i) I had hoped it would give me more time to think about what I want to do for a career.
ii) I'd like to be Doctor....!
iii) It let me get paid for doing something I enjoyed, didn't find absurdly hard and I kept on being a student, but not poor!!