try looking through university websites for scholarships on offer and contact your British Coucil/ American Embassy or equivalent in your country for info on scholarships.

sorry for the typos, i meant - 'i have also lost appetite AND lost a lot of weight.' ..'when you're an international student no one else will. THEY can try but there are points when what you need is family.' one more thing - the reason why exercise is important is because is helps do away with excess adrenaline and other hormones that are produced when you are anxious and when one does not flee or fight, these hormones get stored in your body and if unchecked can lead to problems like high blood pressure. Have a good day and be good to yourself. Start with a smile - DECIDE to smile

Finally, don't get bogged down with the stigma that comes with mental health issues. Remember you are seeing a GP/counselling because YOU have decided that it is good for you and YOU WANT TO HELP YOURSELF. Take time off for a week or so and take your mind completely off things - Don't let this thing kill you. There is more to life! I believe we will get through CompSci, DON'T SUFFER ALONE. Keep us posted on how you are getting on.

Your perspective will become that you are doing it because you want to, not because you have to. Exercise and eat! i have also lost appetite a lot of weight. but i have decided that i have to be good to be good to myself now- i come first before this PhD. Eat - you need to be alive and healthy to finish it, you don't also want to finish and find that you have lost your health. in which case it won't be worth it. Exercise and treat yourself often - shopping is always therapeutical. The key is to be easy on yourself, otherwise when you're an international student no one else will. then can try but there are points when what you need is family. You HAVE TO prioritise looking out for yourself. speaking of boyfriends and friends, i've clashed with many people in the last few weeks because of irritability, anxiety and pressure. Don't feel bad about it,accept it as part of what you're going through.

my family have really helped me to put things into perspective - remember you have a masters. it actually isn't the end of the world if things don't work out. negative as it seems, seeing things from this angle will help you recover your self-worth and control over your PhD.

i don't know when i will get there but every day's work in my view gets me closer to leaving this place. regarding ability - we all have it. we just don't see it after we've been battered so much with rejections of work. i think of my masters and my undergrad years, i would never be anxious about any exams because i believed that i would pass, my problem was 'how well'. i think my anxiety is partly caused by this whole fear of being 'endangered' afraid of failing and never getting there.

i have had a few stints at paper writing, but because of my sup issues i have never got round to publishing. for me, i have decided to take a deep breath and push myself. it is hard as i'm international student and 'i have no one' - i know you can relate to that. at times you need family to keep you going, but when you're on your own you need to find the strength to somehow keep yourself going. this month is going to be another difficult one, redoing my chapters and completing my referencing - that means re-reading some articles for what feels like the hundreth time. what keeps me going is focusing on the end.

CompSci, i haven't read everyone's posts yet, as am really tired from working all night. however, i've read yours. i just want to let you know that you are not the only one in councelling. i'm currently getting counselling for anxiety and irratibity caused by my supervisor problems- particularly to help me handle critique. for the last 20 months nothing worked, til last month when i started to see the light at the end of the tunnel. i worked for so many months and no results, no encouragement.

hey katesays! am 20 months in. almost at the same level.

thanks Ann. i'll try powerpoint and let you know how i get on. getting a cup of tea now.

does anyone know how to draw a flow chart on word? i've tried following instructions but it keeps giving me extra branches i don't need.

i just got up. today is D-day. i have to write or am doomed coz i have to hand in tomorrow. looking forward to it though. i work best under pressure. though starting is the hardest part of things.

this is me now. a lot of bribery will come in handy tomorrow.

try mindmapping? it will help you deal with some ideas without forgetting others or mixing others. it's not the mountain it seems once you break it down to bits in your mind map and deal with one at a time. am gonna be doing that tonight, so you're not alone.

before my phd i worked as a waiter and a cleaner - part time. i don't think anything could be worse than a manual job. but hey, i've waitressed a bit since i started my PhD. i put these on my CV - makes you look more like an all round person. people skills etc. so what i can say is, look for a relevant job, but if you can't find one, don't feel bad. go for whatever it is you find. eventually, its better than nothing - you either make money or gain skills or even both, and its not the end of your PhD dream. You can still get a PhD regardless.