Thanks for the illuminating response, Chrisrolinski: I had noticed that several crewmembers were more rebellious than you usually see in the goody-goody Federation (cf: Wesley Crusher:-s). That explains it.

You'd probably love a book (which I don't have, honest:$) called "The Physics of Star Trek", which tells you, amongst other things, how to detect if you are stuck in a time loop, and how to modify your tricorder to send your future self a message telling you how to escape. Useful.

Juno is scared to open her email cos industrial partners keep demanding more results...argh

I'm watching the re-runs of Voyager on Virgin, but missed the first few. Who can fill me in on this Maquis business, why are half the crew supposedly the enemy? And what do you think of Voyager anyway? Janeway: a bit headmistressy, but she's growing on me.

Juno is counting the days till the undergraduate summer placement students finish and she can get back to doing some bloody research without

a) students asking "Shall I breath in? Shall I breath out again? Miss, is it time to breath in again yet?"
b) said students hogging her bloody desk/computer for Facebook purposes when there's an entire library full of PCs for undergrad use.

He...what is it about those Italians? Do they know something we don't?

I hope you tell those parents to bugger off (or the Italian equivalent).

"It took Juno 18 months to figure out (actually, to be told by H) that the option to switch off this function existed".

Well, remember universities are largely about students in the end. If they drive you that nuts, you could always go and work for Glaxo;-).

I've seen the overprotective parents though. My experience was like yours, Chrisrolinksi: dropped off and buggered off! Which is the best way for a Northern family. My supervisor had had parents request school-style reports for their "children". Answer: no, on account of confidentiality laws.

I think ogling the undergrads is one of the perks of academia!

The same: it's international orientation week, so lots of excited Italians. I know I'm stereotyping, but every one of those Italian girls has Nigella Lawson hair and looks better in skinny jeans than I do:-(. Lots of dads lugging boxes of crockery around the place.

It's nice to see them all so happy though. It's good to be around cheerful people. I have good memories of my first few weeks in halls; good luck to them(up).

I'm turning into one of those grumpy old women moaning about lack of manners in this country, I think. I've taken up jogging recently and literally every single time I've gone running, I've had to put up with gangs of men shouting obscentites and sexual remarks using the worst sort of language. I've even had fathers with small daughters walking next to them, saying this kind of stuff. Was the world always like this or are we really going downhill?

Sounds like it will be fine. As you already know, EVERYONE thinks their thesis is rubbish! It's not. Good luck:-)

He he...just a few more and there'll be enough for a festival of science music:-)

...on second thoughts, perhaps not.

Of course you feel helpless and upset: it's hard enough to get through a PhD without having to deal with jerks like this. I've experienced bullying an manipulation in the lab (though not as bad as you describe) and it really does affect your life.

I expect this man, like most bullies, is relying on you to be afraid to report him for fear of rocking the boat. Stuff him. Kick off big time: tell him calmly that he is making you uncomfortable and that you expect the sexual remaks to cease immediately. Then do as everyone else suggests: keep notes of incidents and take them to a suitable person, and keep doing this until he is removed or learns to behave. You have the right to work in peace!

Despite the stories of failure (and those nicotine-patch manufacturers telling you it's impossible without their product), I found it suprisingly easy. I coughed up crap for a few weeks afterwards, but that's just the old lungs getting to work again. I only really missed it in a social, not a physiological, way. I think all you need to do is wait: boring I know.

I did read this advice in the Sunday papers once: it was referring to keeping resolutions in general. Write out a cheque for 100 pounds to an organisation you really hate (UKIP was the example given), and hand it to a trusted friend, with instructions to mail the cheque if you give in to temptation. The thought of UKIP getting 100 quid of your money should be enough to keep you off the cigarettes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j50ZssEojtM

The LHC rap. It has a certain mid-90's feel to it, I reckon.