Hi Magictime -

Thanks for your thoughts. I had the meeting today and it went ok. Tried very hard to say 'y'know that guy was a complete a-hole' without actually coming out and saying it. Something tells me they knew what I really wanted to say. I just want to finish the damn thing now.

Thank you to everyone on this thread - you've all been very supportive. Greatly appreciated, thank you.

Yes, you're right. I was planning on firstly highlighting where I went wrong in terms of what I (wrongly) expected was going to happen/ which documents and areas they would be focussing on/ questions that would be asked. Had I prepared for all eventualities, perhaps none of this would have happened. So I can certainly put that down to experience. In terms of the internal reader being an 'a-hole' - of course it's tempting to go in there and play the victim, bleating on about what an injustice it was, but that won't get me anywhere. The challenge is, to get across that I know how politically motivated his manner was, without without actually saying so and without looking like I can't take criticism. :/

Hi all,

Thanks for your responses. I'm going for a meeting tomorrow with my supervisor, so I've got a bit of explaining to do. Badhaircut - I'm going to base my 'debrief' around your 2 points: that what happened generally wasn't what I expected (understatement!) and that I felt there was an additional agenda going on. Ultimately, I want to come out of this looking as professional as I can, which is difficult because I did have a bit of a meltdown. It's damage limitation, I suppose. I've read so much on here about nightmare supervisors/ supervisors from hell that I feel very fortunate now. My supervisor is just fantastic - couldn't have wished for any better, so I need to be thankful for that and move on. Thank you everyone.

Hi Badhaircut: Thank you for your reply. It is interesting what you say. If the viva is about your weakest areas, then I got the whole thing wrong and misunderstood in the first instance. With regards to the internal reader's agenda, a few things spring to mind. A few months back was the PhD students research week where we all presented our work. Mine went well and was praised by many of the academics in the department. However, a couple of other students presentations didn't go too well at all and these students are being supervised by the aforementioned internal reader. Their presentations were ripped apart by my supervisor. In one instance, he went as far as to say 'you need to go away and think about how to give a presentation!'. Afterwards, one of the BA course leaders asked me if I could do some lecturing on one of the courses. I was very flattered, but I think what has happened is that the internal reader has taken his "revenge" on my supervisor for being so harsh on his students. It's politics. It's in every department at every university, but it didn't feel good being on the receiving end of it, that's for sure.

Ginga: It certainly felt like bullying and I feel I was used as a pawn in an internal political "one-upmanship" exercise. I want to complete within 3 years as my funding will run out, hence I submitted more than what was probably required at this stage. What gets to me is that my supervisor is a world-class academic in the field (he's been brilliant throughout my PhD) and the internal reader is a bit of a nobody. So yes, perhaps he did see me as a future rival, as Badhair has pointed out.

Dear all,

So glad I've found this website. I am an arts PhD student who has just submitted for my upgrade. I submitted a full, draft intro, 3 chapters (frameworked), another full, complete chapter along with references and appendices. The thesis was about 50,000 words, the appendices containing all the analysis about 25,000. My supervisor had a few issues with it, but none he thought were too major. Anyway, an internal reader was chosen and the meeting was held last week.

They told me immediately I was going to be upgraded, then the internal reader just ripped into it. It was really harsh and he made a beeline for the most incomplete, weakest area (the chapter 2). I told him it needed more work and some more exploration, but he carried on. What transpired was just, well pretty embarrassing, really. He kept taking issue with points in my thesis, then instead of letting me defend, he'd explain what he meant in great detail, lecture me on the background theory of what he wanted me to include and state his reasons why. He was doing all the talking. Every time I wanted to defend, he just held his hand up and said 'I haven't finished!' etc By the time he'd finished lecturing, I'd forgotten what it was he was actually asking me. He banged on and on, ripping into the main point of the thesis (which got me a 1st class MA, my funding - grant + fees - and pretty much the number 1 supervisor in my subject area!) and I just switched off. He ranted on and on negatively about the main point, then my conclusion, which was only offered as a tentative, preliminary summary.

He then laughed and compared my work to 'undergraduate level' and I asked to leave the room. I couldn't concentrate on what he was saying any more and I felt my eyes watering. I went back in after composing myself, but he just carried on (I've been grilled for about 1hr 20 minutes by this time). I just wasn't getting the chance to defend at all and then couldn't hold back the tears. Eventually, after he stopped talking, I asked the head of department if I could go, as I felt I'd done enough. The internal reader just shook his head and gesticulated towards his sheets of paper as though he'd only said half of what he wanted to!

I was utterly humiliated. The whole thing smacked of him trying to impress my supervisor and the head of department. He was the one doing all the talking and making recommendations that were irrelevant to my thesis. I am a lecturer in another university and currently supervise 3rd year UG's and MA students - I could not believe the unprofessionalism. I was most disappointed in that the complete aspects of my work - the ones I agreed with my supervisor would take the main part of the upgrade consideration - went totally ignored. Not one "question". All the weak, least complete and least significant aspects were annihilated.

I'm ashamed at myself for letting this ego-maniac get to me. And worst of all - I let it show.

What to do now? Feel like quitting.
:-(