Different?

======= Date Modified 16 Jun 2010 16:19:36 =======
Oh KB, sorry to hear you're having a tough time with your supervisor, I'm sure this is the sort of thing I'll have to brace myself for come September! All of mine are lovely at the moment, and they don't seem to have reputations for their moods, but I'll wait and see for myself.

Hopefully she'll be fine with you when she gets back, and I really don't think it would have taken much for her to have sent an email to her students last week to let you know she was going away, that would have been the polite thing to do. You seem to have a good relationship with her most of the time, so maybe just tell her when you see her that you didn't know she was away, if she's still in a mood about it.

Take care, Nx

Well I'm working on my official PhD proposal today, as my uni accepted me without seeing an application form and proposal! So I'm writing it up to send to one of my supervisors, she's looking over it for me. Exciting stuff!

Thank you for the new replies to a very old post! Unfortunately I'm not seeing this man any more, for various reasons, but I think my busy schedule made finishing with him easier. Technically I suppose we're on a break, but I can't see anything else happening between us. I'm kind of involved with someone else now, but have no idea where that's going at the moment! The thing is he's as busy as I am so I guess it is easier in a way, but will see how it goes....

Nxx

I'm contemplating having another cup of tea as well, feel so lonely, everyone has gone to bed....:-(

Well I'm only at MSc level so I probably don't have much to complain about really, I feel quite pathetic now!

Good luck, try to get some sleep tonight, I've been following your story and you're doing brilliantly!

I have revived this tonight as I want a little bit of company - have three deadlines for two different modules tomorrow and my editing seems to take forever, not happy. Hopefully I'll be able to go to bed by 1-2am. Anyone else up working? Nx

I can't remember whether I've posted on this thread yet, but I have been following it. Good luck, and I really hope you post some good news later on, I'll be thinking of you. It must be so difficult to think about when you're so pregnant as well, you must be feeling quite uncomfortable now, without the added stress of a viva. I think you've done brilliantly to get your PhD submitted, hopefully today you'll be able to finish it all off and concentrate on having your baby!
Natassia xx

Good luck Eska, and I'm sure you look lovely :-)

When are you presenting?

Nx

I've never been to a conference before but I like talking about clothes!

I think that sounds like a lovely outfit Eska - if the weather's still nice I think you'll see a lot of linen - accessories sound good as well. If anything I'm not sure about a linen blouse with linen trousers, maybe a well-fitted cotton t-shirt-style top instead?

As for skirts, there are some lovely variations on pencil skirts around at the moment with draping and ruffles etc, I would probably wear one of those with a simple top tucked in, and medium-height heels. I would probably wear black opaque tights as well to make it look more formal. There are some really nice shirt dresses around as well - try All Saints and Whistles if you want to invest, or Zara and Topshop for cheaper versions. I haven't even started my PhD yet and I'm daydreaming about my conference outfits, how sad!

This is an interesting topic...generally I don't mind when someone calls me 'love' or whatever, the only one that bothers me sometimes is 'babe'. I almost always perceive it as friendly rather than patronising or anything else.

I use 'darling', 'sweetie' and 'honey' the most I think, not that I use them all the time, mainly at work as it's how we tend to address each other, I guess as terms of endearment as I work with a large group of girly girls (p/t time in a hairdressers)! I use them most with the assistants when asking them to do something, so I guess that is patronising sometimes - I think in that environment it is a bit tongue in cheek really.

I use words like that quite a lot with my girlfriends as well, so I think I would call them "terms of endearment". I think 9 times out of 10 it's ok to use these terms, as they are so ingrained in our everyday language. If I was annoyed about someone addressing me in that manner, I would never say so either.

Hi Kallie, firstly congratulations on getting accepted for your PhD, I am in the same position as you but still completing my MSc, will be starting my PhD a few weeks after submitting my dissertation. What field are you in?

I think all of your doubts are normal, it is after all a major transition. I think that what you may do afterwards depends on your field and what you want to do. In terms of the recession and HE cuts I've been told that things should improve in the next few years, so hopefully I will be able to get work afterwards (I'm in the social sciences), but it still concerns me. I want to have an academic career -  and my supervisors want me to finish with my PhD, publications and teaching experience. They have said that my PhD is only the beginning, like an apprenticeship, and to be able to get a good job afterwards I need to have more than that to show for my three years. One of my supervisors has talked about putting me on a teaching course at the beginning of my PhD so that I can start teaching asap, I don't know whether that will materialise though, it depends on how much money the department has to spend.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that you will be doing more than just your PhD, if your supervisors are interested in developing your career, providing you want an academic career afterwards. You should also be going to conferences. I think you're probably best speaking to your supervisor(s) about your other doubts at the beginning, but I'm sure you are capable and have shown enthusiasm and aptitude, otherwise they would not be funding you.
Good luck, I hope I've helped, Nx

Thanks for the reassuring replies - Eska I think you're right that I'm worrying more about this than I usually might, due to the stress I am under, I am really looking forward to starting this PhD and the different way of working, and would be devastated if I wasn't able to continue with it due to a poor grade at Masters level. I have been at the university for nearly four years now, my supervisors all know me very well so they should have some faith in me, two of them are writing my references for my application!

DanB - I would have handed in this semester's work by the 11th June so will be finalising the proposal then, one of my supervisors is looking over it for me before I submit it. I have my references and the rest of the application already done, so hopefully the application will be in a few days before the deadline on the 30th June. I've been told I don't have to have another interview, or to do as long a proposal and personal statement as other candidates, to be honest there's not much they could learn about me from it as I've been there so long and discussed my proposal with all of them! It's literally so that I can enrol, so they say.

Thanks again, Nx

Firstly I am sorry to hear about your situation, it sounds very difficult, especially when you have already passed a significant amount of your Masters. Personally I think it would be a shame to defer now as I think it would give you something good to focus on, away from your work stress and personal problems, and then you won't have it hanging over you. I think you could do it in 12 weeks, but that will be difficult if you are working full time as well, being in a stressful job won't help either. At my university you can have until December if you want to write up your dissertation without having to pay any extra fees, it might be worth looking into your university's policy on that.

If you have an area that you are sure you want to focus on, I think you should approach your supervisor with a clear plan, I do think he was a bit unfair to you before but I think you have a chance to prove to him that you do want to do your dissertation and are capable of doing it. Be honest about the problems that you faced before, I know this is difficult as I've had to do similar with my supervisor ut he will appreciate your honesty and hopefully be able to help you himself. If you want to research a different area, maybe email a different tutor who is more interested in the area to see what they think?


I hope you can sort something soon, keep us updated, Nx

Thank you, I think I'll just have to email then see what the offer letter says to be sure, but it's good to hear about others who have been in similar situations, Nx