Oh dear, I'm sorry you are feeling so low!

First of all, take a deep breath. Let's get some perspective on this. You sound like you are in a situation that I know all too well. I am feeling like I am wasting valuable PhD time on other things (non or barely related academic stuff, procrastinating) all the time. You are not alone!

Next, what really helps me in those situations, is to sit down and make a list of all the various things I need to do. Break them up into small bits. That will make the list longer but also more manageable. Set deadlines for each individual task, and set a priority level, too. Those things with the highest priority you must keep the deadline. Those with lower priority are more flexible on the deadline. That way you don't just break huge tasks into small, manageable bits, but you also get a feeling for what is really important and what is "just" urgent.

When you feel comfortable with your list, summarise it into a shorter list where the tasks are not broken down into little bits anymore, but you keep the priority levels. Take this list to your next supervisor meeting and discuss it there. That way your sups will see that you are busy, that you are prioritising your PhD work, and they will most likely stop making you put time into things that they agree with you not to be of high priority.

I think/hope that perhaps simply by doing this you will start feeling more confident. When you are more confident, your writing will get easier, too. Writing multiple (and not just 3 or so, really multiple multiple) drafts for a paper is completely normal. Very few exceptional people can just sit down and write a perfect, printable piece at the first go. Believe me, you'll get there! And your final paper will be all the better for all the work you have put into it!

Good luck!

pineapple, if you don't want to pursue a career in academia, and are unhappy with your PhD, then I really don't see the point of staying on to achieve a PhD when you can have an MPhil right now, leave, and start doing something you enjoy.

if you get an MPhil now you can always tell yourself that you have studied your chosen topic intensively, you made something out of it, and you got a degree for it. then you left to do something more interesting. how good is that?

if you want to go on to be a lecturer or researcher, then probably it would be worth sticking in there and doing those extra bits of work that will get you that PhD. inside academia, i think a PhD is a bit more work for a huge difference in prospects and standing. outside of academia, i think a PhD is a lot more work than a MPhil but with little to no extra recognition.

just on the side: from some of your posts in the past i got the impression that you tend to have low self-confidence when in fact most people around you value your work highly. if you do want to stay in academia, don't let a bad day keep you from going where you want to go!

:-)

Thanks for sharing! As I look out the window and see sun and blue sky, I think I'm going to jump on my bike with a smile on my face today, too.

(up)

If you are a little flexible, this is how you need to go about it:

- Leave late, get home late. I also commute from outside of London and have found that when I take a train that arrives in London before 10am, the return trip costs me £11.80; if I leave before 10 but arrive in London after 10 it costs me £6.55; and if I leave after 10, it costs me 5.60. That's less than half. That is, assuming you have a Young Persons Railcard. This has the added advantage that you avoid the big crowds and actually get to sit on the train and do some work.

- Save by not going in every day. Don't buy season tickets, they rarely pay. When you buy single tickets, you save money every day you stay at home. So make sure you have a place at home where you can work!

If you don't have this flexibility, and need to be in every day at early hours, then perhaps you should consider moving closer? The money you save on the rent outside of London is quickly lost by the high transport costs.

have you tried last.fm? If you put in for example "Counting Crows" it will create a playlist for you called "Artists similar to Counting Crows".

I have an odd, mixed music taste. Sometimes I focus more on the text than on the music. Thus there are times when I really need to listen to Help! from the Beatles. Reminds me that "I could do with a little help from my friends"! And there is a Chris de Burgh song, I don't know what it's called, but its refrain goes "I'm going home!" and that is really what I like to hear when I am approaching the end of a bad time and can soon finally go home. But usually I am not really so much a Beatles/Chris de Burgh person.

Because I want to do research and teach. I am doing it now, as a PhD student, and when I get that PhD I might actually manage to get paid for doing it. Which means I will have to do less other things (to earn my way) and can do more of the teaching and researching.

I am sometimes torn between the teaching and the research. It is such fun to do research. It is soooo rewarding to work with keen, curious, often young people and see how they develop. Overall I think it just needs to go hand in hand, the teaching and the researching.

I've read "Never let me go" which is a wonderful, terrible book. Indeed, it doesn't let you go!

So let's start a book club :-) I'll try to get my hands on A pale view of hills, too.

Hi there,
thanks everyone for your replies, as they are useful for me too! I am also recruiting a specific patient group, but I need a much smaller number of "subjects" (purely qualitative approach). So far I have found some people through internet support groups, and one through a friend of a friend. As these sources seem to have dried up (it is a topic that many don't wish to speak about), I will next be leaving "posters" in waiting rooms. I will also be e-mailing all of my friends and everyone I know, for them to spread the word. I am hoping that some know someone who knows someone...

I have so far not offered any incentives when recruiting. Those who I have already interviewed all said, without exception, that they felt rewarded simply by having someone to talk to about the things they would normally keep to themselves. I do give them small gifts (such as a pretty paper notebook) as a token to show them that I value their willingness to participate, and also to keep them happy, as I conduct two follow-up interviews with each participant. My interviews are meant to last an hour each, but some have taken longer - I would never cut them short, as they become longer when the participant "needs" to talk more, and in that way I am not just using them as my research subjects, but also giving something back - even if it is just an open ear.

Concerning ideas about how to design such a poster and what to put in it, I have been considering leafing through the appendixes of older PhD theses. That might help :-)

I think it depends not so much on how badly you want _a_ PhD but rather on how much you want _this_ PhD.

In response to your question: I started self-funded. My savings disappeared pretty fast. In my second year, I got a grant from my uni that covered the fees, and earned some money by teaching. Now for about a year to go, I have a grant that covers my living costs, roughly speaking for year 3. I suppose that after that I will revert to self-funded, will get a job, will finish write-up on part-time.

Regarding friends who think you are mad: I have friends back home, who are doing the same as me (a PhD), but they get paid wages for this. They think I am mad for paying for the priviledge of doing work. I suppose it is all about different perceptions and valuations of a PhD. For me, what I do is quite clearly work, with an aspect of education built into it (as is in very many jobs outside of academia, too). In this country (UK), PhDs are more likely to be seen as study, as education, with a higher degree of independence built in than for undergrads. I suppose you should ask yourself: a) Do I think education is valuable? b) Do you think you already have all the education you need and want? If your answer is (a)no and (b)yes, then it would indeed seem mad. If it is yes, no, then it seems like a sensible investment into your future and your happiness.

People outside academia tend to not really understand such decisions because they are based on different values and interests than their own. That's why you might appear mad to them. But a word of caution: You might want to really reflect on your underlying reasons for wanting to do a/this PhD. Be warned: If it is because you want to earn more money after finishing, you are probably indeed mad. If it is because you have a deep, intrinsic interest in your research, be aware that there are good chances that you will hate your topic by the time you are finished (though that is not always the case, of course). If it is because you envisage yourself working in academia, look up the rates at which people in your discipline actually manage to secure a job after getting that PhD. It might be quite disheartening.
If it is a job as lecturer you are after, just keep in mind that your "investment" is likely to be more than 3 years of self-funded PhD. First, your PhD is likely to take more than three years. Second, afterwards you might find yourself "post-doc-ing" on low wages for maybe 5 years, constantly moving around, before you can get that lecturer job. By that time your friends will own houses, cars and have started families. Then, they will really think you are mad!

But it's not all doom and gloom. If you really want this PhD, go for it! I did, and don't regret it (except sometimes ;-) ) I just wanted to make you aware that things might be worth thinking through. Many new PhDs start without really knowing what they are getting into. When it is your own savings that you are putting into it, you should really know that what you are paying all this money for (not to speak of all the rest) is something that you really want. Just so you don't end up buying a nightmare instead of a dream.

In any case: Good luck!

When I started teaching, I learned in a course aimed at improving our teaching skills that you can always relax after a strict first impression, but you cannot (or, it is hard to) straighten up after a relaxed first impression. So the advice was, be formal for the first few weeks and then take it from there. I was teaching Sociology where too stylish can actually be counterproductive, but still I followed that advice and it worked out well. After about half a term I started relaxing my appearance but it was important to establish at the beginning that I'm the teacher, not one of them.

We were also told to introduce ourselves as Ms. X rather than by first names, in order to establish authority. I did that and relaxed on it later on, but by the end of the year some students were still calling me Ms. X while others were addressing me by first name, so that sort of created some confusion.

Good luck with the teaching!

i sort of remember from when i installed endnote on a mac a few years ago, that it was quite a lot more complicated than installing it on windows. it's been a while but i remember finding help on the help pages. also i seem to remember that it involved installing word AFTER installing endnote. - so re-installing word after everything else was done.

good luck in your final hours!

Thanks Chris 8-)

Good news! Way to go, Jojo. We're all with you. I hope it works out, and soon you will be Dr. Jojo!

Sorry this is very off-topic, and purely for Chrisrolinski:

Have you seen this?

Michigan State University, East Lansing, Michigan, USA
April 16-17, 2009

Thisconference will explore the past, present and future roles animals playin human histories. Possible topics for papers include animalhistories, animal agency, anthropomorphism, zoomorphism, animalperception, gender and connecting (or separating) oppressions, andanimals as technologies.

Keynote Speaker: Harriet Ritvo, Department of History, Massachusetts Institute of Technology.

GuestSpeakers: Tom Tyler, Department of Philosophy and Culture, OxfordBrookes University, United Kingdom, and Terry O'Connor, Department ofZooarchaeology, York University, United Kingdom.

We encourage submissions from interdisciplinary and international perspectives. Graduate students are welcome to apply.

Submissions should include the paper title and abstract (max. 500 words) and a short biography of the speaker.

All speakers must register for the conference.

Deadline for paper submissions: September 29, 2008

Paper submissions should be sent to Georgina Montgomery at [email protected]

Dr. Georgina Montgomery
Assistant Professor
Lyman Briggs College
Michigan State University

And to make it related to the topic, after all: You could reward me with a star... :-)

In Switzerland, the average age of women at the time of the birth of their first child has just reached 30. I suppose that the average age of academics (let's say, all women who have a degree) when they have a first child, is even higher. Obviously this is problematic, as fertility drops with age. It is thus perhaps no surprise that in Switzerland, 40% of academic women never have a child. (On the other hand, that means that more than half do have a child. When I tell that to academic friends, they are usually very surprised - they would have guessed much less.)

As Swantje described it for Germany: It's the same in Switzerland. Perhaps it is not the long time it takes to reach a PhD that is exceptional, but rather the relatively short time experienced in the UK and US.
On the other hand, in Switzerland (and in Germany too, I believe) you get paid to do your PhD (in most cases), and you don't pay any fees. So that sounds as if it were worse in Canada.

I'm 32 now, in my second year of a UK PhD, and planning on having a baby soon (as soon as I finish my fieldwork). This issue has been discussed several times in the past on this forum, perhaps you want to run a search?