This is definitley a topic we should discuss later - I know lots of people who have done this in different ways.

Oh that's how I did it because (insert long story) I had to - but the best way that most people plan it is to give birth just after submission (not necessarily before viva).

I think it's like being a parent. Some parents treat their children badly because that's how they were treated. And other parents treat their children well because the were treated badly themselves.

So it is with academics. Some will not give the support they were denied themselves. And others will give it because they they idn't have it themselves and want to improve on the status quo.

That is my motto borrowed from Louis Pastuer: 'My strength lies solely in my tenacity'. Without that I'd be toast. I've often wondered to myself - should it really be this tough?

Well I guess we must agree to differ there. There is a time to be ruthlessly blunt but we're not talking about the invasion of Poland here - this is just a freakin' chat forum.

Well jouri could you at least start your sentence with one..?

Well Badhaircut I think I have plenty to feel angry about - maybe we should start a new thread and go point-to-point on the shit we have had heaped on us. But that is our baggage to deal with and not something to fuel hostility at passing bystanders.

Or am I the first

I think you're absolutely right - a career in academia may well be like a life-long PhD - only worse :-X

Badhaircut - are you the Simon Cowell of this bb

You do tell it like it is that's for sure - but has anyone ever suggested that you are overly blunt, tactless and unfeeling?

How about I just cycle home

A good friend of mine is married to a Zimbabwean called Patience. I well know that it is easy to sound patronising with this kind of talk which is why I generally don't try it unles face to face when you can properly explain yourselves. I truly don't wish to offend anyone. Perhaps when you come up to Cambridge we can continue this discussion over a bowl of sadza and a beer!

That is a point Badhaircut - but perhaps not too harshly pointed out?

Well I'm just telling my experience to see if it helps give some perspective.

And you can't have it both ways - if it's not a cultural misunderstanding - then it's just stupidity plain and simple.