Tricky situation... but honestly, it sounds like you should quit. The only time I'd advise someone not to quit is if the going was getting tough, they were experiencing x,y, and z, but they actually WANTED to do a PhD right now. Unless they were right at the finish line - because then quitting would seem like a no brainer since they had put so much in already.

If it is just a temporary (couple of months maybe) block then I guess persevere. But if you deep down don't want to do a PhD right now, there is no point trying to go through with it because of others' expectations. It will only get worse, and possibly lead to you quitting in the middle or, worse, near the end. It is worth remembering that if you decide to stop then you will still have the necessary qualifications and abilities - so there's nothing to stop you returning to academia in the future.

That is unacceptable! Hope you manage to find some colleagues with more respect. As for the response of your instructors - ridiculous. I wish you were in the UK.

Hi Selkie

Brainstorm what you need to do, turn that into a plan of action, and start - in bitesize chunks. You'll get there. Seems like you might need to determine what is your focus now - continuation report or data (or both). There should be a document telling you what is required/expected - e.g., a document of how many words, covering what (intro, RQs, plan, timetable) and when the deadline is. If there isn't, you could check this with your advisor / supervisor / other PhD students you know.

Don't mope, forget about whose fault anything was, make a plan and get going! (And maybe make a conscious note that you need to try and extract info from your sup going forward, as it seems they are not the type to give it for free but rather expect you to read their mind!)

Cheers Hugh : )

Yep, it makes sense. Up to now things to discuss haven't really been very substantive (I think that is the right word), so it hasn't been necessary to send much (only drafts - which we don't discuss but just deal with over email). Now I'm planning more studies I guess I can send over my ideas/rationale and brief outline of design.

Cheers CR1980. I will try sending out something ahead of time (bullet points) so that the discussion can take off.

I don't mean generally (e.g., by email or phone), I mean if you want to discuss plans/findings etc. Would you email some sort of synopsis before a meeting so that they can read through it and you're on the same page for the meeting, or would you just bring notes to the meeting and talk through stuff there? Probably quite a dumb question. I just find that my meetings don't always go as well as they could do. What do you do, and does it work?

Good point - I had assumed this was an application for funding.

Ps. If you are putting in a separate application with the MA supervisor then why not make the changes anyway (if they at all make sense)? You would still be submitting the other version to the other four institutions.

Hi Nad75

Iit would seem to me that the difference in opinion about your proposal may be stemming from the fact that your MA supervisor is from a different field. I think that the feedback from the potential supervisors in the field is more important. It is normal to not have to make changes if the proposal is to a high standard. I can't see what they would have to gain by saying great if it is poor. Also to get that response across the board (4 or more individuals?) would suggest that it can be trusted. Did you directly request feedback?

Best
Tudor

You never know!!! :D

Hey Iwan

I see where you're coming from. You really are in the early stages though, so try not to worry. You will thank your sup later for making you (or letting you) be independent from day one. That independence doesn't mean that you can't run your plans and thoughts by your supervisor - that is what they are there for (in my view at least) - to provide some guidance once you've shown initiative and made some tracks yourself (which by the sounds of it you are doing - including the mistake you made - that is part of the progress and learning, even though it feels horrible at the time).

I'm not a bio scientist so can't share closely related experience, but it took me a good while to "get into" my PhD. Some of my peers had got much further with their projects than I had by the time I finally felt like I was on track. I felt pretty peed off, demotivated, and lost for a while - but it did eventually get better (maybe half a year in). I'm very glad I persevered through all those feelings. As pm33 says, try not to compare yourself to others. Everything you're doing during this time of uncertainty will be useful later (even if it is "just" that you learnt some basic stuff and got familiar with the lab). Your breakthrough will come.

All the best :)

Hi again Bah, thanks for explaining the situation more. It still may have nothing to do with your appearance... I feel quite strongly about this as it is so easy to attribute reasons for people's behaviours, and those reasons may be completely wrong but can still lead to the individual getting a complex about X or Y that is different about them. If you looked "the same" as the others, this may still be happening - seriously. People are weird. They may think that they click and that their bond is made stronger by excluding a third person. That is just one other potential reason - there are many many more. Anyway, whatever the reason - even if it is differences in appearance - I hope you soon get to meet some people are more friendly and considerate of others.

So glad to hear things have improved Nesrine!

Excellent! Good luck! No, I was completely open about it and said X is my first choice! Hope your first choice comes through quickly.