Thanks for sharing - I'm glad it's not just me that finds it rude! It kind of feels like slap in the face! I don't get offended though - as usually people who do it are fine in person - and so I figure it's just their email style and it isn't meant to be rude. It seems way less common here in the UK - I don't really know anyone who does it here. It seems way more common in the States. I just can't figure out if anyone can address anyone like that. I just can't imagine addressing my manager or supervisor like that. One day maybe I'll bring myself to be able to it! And yes, I decided to use Hello name, as that felt more formal than high and more polite than name only! :D

Hi folks!

I don't usually have trouble crafting emails, but I've recently been corresponding with someone in a senior position and whom I have never met (and only just been put in touch with - by email).

So my normal thing is to just address people how they address me... this means that if they write Dear my first name, I would normally follow suit when I reply (especially if it is a more senior person) - until it becomes less formal over time. Or if they start off with Hi/Hi name then I go right into using Hi (name) as well. But I just wondered out of interest what would others do in the following scenario...

This senior person who I don't know yet is addressing me by my name and no greeting at all (a pet hate of mine but doesn't normally matter as I normally just reply "Hi first name" to that anyway). But to reply "Hi first name" to this person seems too informal - given their position and the fact we've never met and these are our first emails. And to just use his first name with no other greeting word, as he is doing, to me feels rude.

So any suggestions? By the way - I think I'm posting this as I'm curious to see what others do as opposed to it being something that is deeply bothering me! Thanks!

Can people who live alone really be exempt from CT? I thought it was just a reduction? Also, had no idea it could vary location to location. Interesting stuff!

Ps. The supervisor is there to guide you. You don't need to worry about trying to impress or hide things or justify progress so as to speak. Just be honest, share your work as frequently as possible so that he can actually provide that guidance. Some of it will be critical - and it's better to get that as soon as possible - so you can improve it sooner rather than spending excessive amounts of time and then realising things need to be done differently.

Hi! Yes just contact him! I am surprised he hasn't contacted you! You need to make sure that you make the most of your supervision / are having regular contact, otherwise things could be really difficult if there are any difficulties / issues later on. I find it incredibly strange that a supervisor hasn't made contact with their student in 4 months (if I am understanding correctly). I would be concerned about how invested they were in me and my project, and I'd be wanting to meet up and make sure that we booked in fortnightly or monthly meetings - especially at such an early stage of the PhD.

Your email is extremely formal and polite but that is fine if that is the terms you are on with him at present (first name terms are much more typical in the UK at least). Mine would look something like this:

Hi John (or Dear John if still in the very early days of the student-supervisor relationship, or if that is how they still addressed me)

I hope this email finds you well. Could you let me know a good time when I could meet with you to update you on my progress? (or maybe: I wondered if there was a good time this week or next when we could meet to discuss my project and the plans going forward?)

Thanks and looking forward to hearing.

Best wishes
Tudor

But just send it and arrange to meet asap, please! :D

All the best,
Tudor

I should think you'd be entitled to JSA and any housing benefit help available for those seeking work and able to demonstrate that they are seeking work. I'd ring your local JSA or the national number to find out for sure.

Have you tried searching the existing threads on this forum? I'm sure I've seen this query come up before. Good luck!

Hi Visquire

Ah OK - I thought maybe there was some other issue I wasn't aware of. Yeh, I don't think unusual is a red light flasher in this scenario. By the way, have you actually contacted them explained your situation and asked if you could simply do the +3? It would save them money so maybe they wouldn't have too many objections if you make a strong case for it!

Re staying in the same institution. I've heard that this used to be perceived as a negative whereas this is less so the case these days. From my personal experience (UG, MRES, PhD all in the same place), I think it is good to go elsewhere rather than stay in the same place. But I think that's less an issue for employers etc and more of a personal preference. Others may have different experiences/opinions. Anyway, something to off-set any potential disadvantage could be to try and at least visit another lab during your PhD - maybe go for an ESRC overseas institutional award if you can find somewhere willing to host you for a few weeks. This could help broaden your experience and help you to meet new potential collaborators etc.

Best
Tudor

I'm kind of wondering the same...! I mean, I can see why it might be a bit unusual - wow, three masters... why? But the only negative interpretation I can think of is that the person assumes that you are addicted to the student life and don't want to get into the world of work. But it is something that can easily be explained in any personal statement, interview, or conversation. When could this ever be considered anything as strongly as career suicide?

Nudge anyone else? : )

It can't do any harm! It's a pain in some ways to have to do another, but definitely can't harm you. You can just explain why you ended up with three. I know several people with two plus a PhD.

I think they are the same. In the UK the supervisor does not normally attend. Outcomes can be: pass, pass with minor corrections, pass with major corrections, fail (with possible downgrade to MPhil).

Hi, I'm sorry but I don't remember what your story is. I think the bottom line is, if you think that they really have the power to do you harm if they see you at the conference and then speak with your current employer, you should avoid going. That's just pragmatic. It's important to protect yourself. That said, I really don't know the situation. If you think you can ignore it or defend yourself and if you think your current employer will pay more attention to you than to them, then maybe you should go. After all, you can't let this fear / them make you miss out on opportunities etc. And once you've faced them once it will be done with and easier next time. But if you think it's too great a risk at this stage / asking for trouble, then don't go.

I've just thought of one more thing. Could you actually inform your current employer about it, ie. that you know x, and that there was a bit of a misunderstanding? Then at least you will have made that clear already, and so you won't be so worried about what might be said at the conference?

Just to say - I understand a bit where you're coming from. I had a negative situation where I was scared of the harm my former supervisors could do me. It's a horrible situation to be in. These things can end well though, I'm glad to say. And decent people - that is, people who are actually worth working with - can see through gossip / slander or at least give the benefit of the doubt until they form their own opinions.

Hello, my immediate thought would be to attend. Why should they stop you from attending. But I don't fully understand the detail of what you are saying. What are the actual risks of you attending? Is the worst thing that they could gossip about you / make up something negative about you? To whom? And what would the impact of that be? If you have a good relationship and can be open with your current employer then I should think that they would know you and trust you, and thus their view of you wouldn't be altered by some silly gossip. I may have misunderstood the situation though. Will your employer be present, and is she or he a collaborator of your ex supervisor? Just trying to understand better.

Only just saw this and might be too late! Can the private messages bit be changed? I always have too delete a conversation / message before I can send / receive one, as the limit of 50 is quite low. Also it is just quite a cumbersome private message interface. Any way it could be improved would be great!