I do like the work I'm doing, but sometimes I find it all becomes very boring and tedious. Just sitting there reading, reading, reading, then writing, writing. And I think 'will it ever end?' and 'it's going to get much worse before it gets better'. I'd like to ask what tactics people use to counter the feelings of boredom (and dread) they may get sometimes? Hopefully, I can learn by example :-)

Hiya Maggie, could you be a little more specific?

Because you want to acquire the skills necessary to become a dedicated researcher?

Grrr! Why the hell should you have to pay to put an article in a journal?! Christ, they make enough with their pay-per-view and subscriptions! Bring on open access.

If you like South Park and want to see all the episodes, no strings attached, you can see them here: http://www.xepisodes.com It's brill. And, no, it's not spam. :-)

Hiya Pam, sorry to hear about your situation. I'm in a similar boat, in that moving back to my parents I also have a younger sister who is pregnant, due to give birth in May, and is quite gobby. My brother is a heavy drinker, also lives at home and like to watch Chuckle Brothers at 3 in the morning, drunk as a skunk. His room is directly below what will be my room. The house is also extremely cluttered and the room I will have tiny. So, yep, it's going to be a massive struggle. Is there no way you can create your own space, where it is peaceful and quiet, or is there just not the room?
It's so difficult, because on the basis of what you describe, it seems that there is no solution. A good trick I used to use to tackle the sound issues the last time I lived at my parents' was ear phones playing relaxing music or comfy foam ear plugs. It could be worth I try, though I know it sounds silly. You could try and work in the library but I suppose if you live far away that's not practical. Perhaps time out could be an option, as suggested. I know I've been thinking about it. But then, you could be like me, and worry that if you take a bit of time away, to reassess or whatever, how easy will it be start again and get going? Do you live near any friends who have a bit of space where you can go off and study during the day or evening, perhaps? Sorry I can't be of any further help.

:-(

Nisha, as you request to please you and meet your desires I have searched far and wide. I do not think you will have to travel far to settle these research projects and I there are many to choose from. I wish you well with your work. Anyway, you're welcome in advance. Here is the link:http://www.infowest.com/life/plants.htm

I've been through this interim assessment, and, based on my experience, I think that the document you produce is very individual. If you like, I can send you a good example of an interim assessment for a qualitative research PhD. Just PM me for further details. Thanks.:-)

Hiya Pam, thanks for asking. It's crappy at the moment and I'm not getting any work done really. But the way I see it, I'm young (28), don't have any children with her and we're not married, so it could have been a lot worse. I'm still getting pangs of jealousy when I think of her meeting someone else. But that's life and I have to accept it. She has her own life now, and it doesn't involve me in that kind of capacity. Hopefully, it'll get easier and, not to sound selfish, there'll be good times in my life again. I just wish I could wipe my memories that distress me when I think about them - ala Enternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind - and then the good times would hurry up.
My mates are there for me and are giving me something of a support network, and have fed me a wheel barrow full of cliches. Things like: plenty more fish in the sea; time's a great healer; and it's better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. The last one is a particular favourite, but I completely disagree with it.
The thing about our line of work is that we have a lot of time to think, and that's what I do. Unfortunately, it's about what has happened, so it's like sticking the knife back in, again and again, day after day. I know that I'll be fine in the end. I'm just going to need a lot of time to change my life and what I now dedicate it to, aside from my work. Thanks for relating to me. :-)

Hiya, Chris, I don't know why I know this, but I think it's pretty nominal - a couple to a few hundred pounds per academic year I think. I know that at some unis they don't even charge writing up fees. At Salford University this is the case, at least.

PamW, Chrisrolinski and Pero12 - thank you for sharing your experiences with me and helping me to put things into perspective. It's not really getting any easier at the moment, and I get really upset in the day when I try and do work (thank God most of it is done at home). It is like a bereavement and I know I'll have to build a new life. It's just things have been so good for two years. Having shxt days and knowing I was going home to someone who loves me as much as I love her, looking forward to weekends and just having a great time together is something I'm really, really going to miss.
It's made me realise how much of myself I invested in her and how much she shaped me as a person, and it's like trying to come off a really addictive drug. During my more desperate moments, I've said to her that we don't have to be lovers as such as really close friends because I care about her so much and would like to be the best friend I can be for her. But I know that that isn't healthy and I won't be able to handle it when she does fall for someone else. She is away for the night again, spends most of the nights away and I can't work. My head spins with suspicion and jealously. To be so close to someone and so much in love, then to lose it suddenly, it's horrible.
One thing's for sure though. The situation has made me realise how much I have neglected my friends, old and recent. I'll try and fill the time by seeing them and trying to speak to the when I can. Hopefully, years from now I'll look back on my time with her with fond memories. Obviously I don't want to be a stalker but I hope I can remain close to her and chat to her sometimes, once I get my head straight, because I think we could be really good friends. Thank you for your input.

Thanks for the advice, Delta. I'm a very private person but, as it's anonymous, it's really nice to hear someone else's opinion. I wish I could take some time out, but my research is funded in such a way that I can't. I've spoke to close friends and they say the same thing as you, that one of us needs to move out. I think it will be most likely me. The problem is the finality of it and the gaping hole that will be left in my life. I'm not sure how I'm going to adapt to it, after years of being very happy and having routines.

Right, I just feel that I really need to write what I am going to because this past month or so has been hell for me. I've not done any work of substance, don't feel particularly inclined to and nothing seems to matter. I might be clinically depressed because I don't even feel like getting out of bed and get very upset at stupid times.
My long term relationship has come to a rather nasty end. She told me that she has come to the conclusion that we are very different people, that she gets angry at me when she knows she shouldn't and that I need to concentrate on my work. We still currently live together but she's started going out more than she ever has (spend most of the week away) and she tries not to talk to me, and is very tense and terse when I try and talk to her. The thing is I still love her and I'd drop this PhD I'm doing if I thought it would make any difference - I can't do it at the moment anyway. When she's not in a wonder where she is and what she's up to? Has she found someone else? There's just no space in my head for my work. Worst still, I know that we are separated and what she gets up to is none of my business.
I can't seem to get over it though - it feels like a bereavement. She wasn't just my girlfriend, she was also my best friend. My PhD is very lonely, but she was always there. And it wasn't a problem to begin with. I always made time for her. But things have changed so dramatically and I can't seem to adapt. I'm not being maudlin or soft but I thought my future was with her and we had plans.
Everything we've been through together and experienced, it doesn't mean anything now. It upsets me to think about it. How do you go forward? How do I even try to think about my work, because it seems to mean fxxk all now. I'm just not arsed. I just want her back and would do anything but it's not going to happen.

Hiya, Sleepy, that sounds grim. It seems like he's stitched you over. How can he decide that he's going to take the role assigned to you? He has no right, as it was a joint agreement between you both. How would he feel if you suddenly made a decision as drastic as that, like, hmmm, you're totally in charge of it all? Sounds to me like that's what he's done. If I were you, I'd talk to him tactfully about it, tell him you feel a tad usurped. It doesn't seem fair. Sorry, if I've misunderstood.:-)

Brill, A119 - that's just what I needed to hear. My stuff is non-invasive too and I wasn't planning on waiting 24 hours. Thanks a lot.