Just as well you're safely in that taxi home, Eska. Of course I know my onions, it's just you're a philistine. Honestly, I try to introduce my fellow PhD students to a nice bit of culture with a fantastic menu that I, as Ejc said, I spent most of my stipend on, and this is the reaction I get. Well, that wasn't a long curly hair you found in your soup. That was part of the remains of Foxy the Gerbil - Sneaks was right about a rodent running loose in my kitchen. So, if anything was sub-par it has nothing to do with my culinary skills; it was because I was distracted by a rodent. Right, I wonder who will be next to hold a Celebrity PhD Student Come Dine with Me dinner party?

Hello Cobweb, I think it depends on many factors. How well do you know about what you are writing about? Exactly what is it you're writing about? Is it a lit review (in which case it will take ages)? Is it the methodology - which should be somewhat easier and not take as long? Presuming it's a lit review, that you don't know anything about it and thus that you need to learn about it from scratch, synthesise all the information, plan and then structure a piece of writing, it would take me about 2 to 3 months. I like to think I'm a fast worker too. Hope this helps in it's own little way.

Welcome Catlinbond, it seems that things are really picking up now. Thanks for the mid-range bottle of red - just let me hide it so that Sneaks doesn't get her mits on it and drink it. A cactus? Brill - a plant that I don't have to worry about watering. My swanky pad has just become even swankier. Oh, and thanks for the 8/10!

Good evening, Mystic-Guru. A member of my PhD supervisory team is doing a PhD by publication. You typically need to have at least 5 papers published at my uni, and you still have to go through many of the procedures that you encounter through the usual route of a PhD - so unfortunately you don't eschew the philosophical elements. I've got the guidelines for my uni concerning what you need to do to obtain a PhD by publication. If you like, I would be very happy to send it to you.

By the way, you line of work sounds fascinating - real CSI stuff.

Su, I sent you a private message about that Discovering Statistics book. It is good, so I hope you find it useful.

I've submitted a number of conference abstracts in my time and I agree with XJR. Now, I would include the references, there won't be many anyway because I don't think you'll have the space and you don't include many anyway.

Thanks for the 9 out of 10 PhDBug! It's a pity I can't get you to eat more salad though! Sneaks, I love the abstract art painting you gave me - it speaks volumes and I can't really, erm, identify with it. As for using a gerbil as a kitchen assistant, you must be seeing things. I hate the little critters and if I saw one in my kitchen, I'd be putting it in my blender!
Well, the turn out four my meal was a bit disappointing - only 4 PhD celebrities turned up. Just Eska, Sneak, Ejc and PhDBug :-( Ah well, before we move onto the next celebrity dinner, I wonder what my final score is?

Hello Eska and Ejc - you're just one time. Sneaks has already arrived, but between you and me I think she started (nudge, nudge - drinking) ages ago because she thinks I have a gerbil helping me in the kitchen and she asked for a meat alternative to salad! Oh, expensive rose wine, Eska? Thank you. I see they must have run out of Blue Nun at your local Spar. EJC, where's your contribution to the dinner? Eska brought wine, so what have you brought. I'm still boiling the lobster claws but am just about ready to pull the starters out of the over.
Although I'm a modest man, I do like to demonstrate my wealth, influence and power - so take a look around! See the pictures of me teaching the poor people of Madagascar, the one of me advertising the Brut range of man smells - oh, and I'm sorry for blushing, if you look around you'll see the one of me posing alluringly for a charity event (it's alarmed, so don't try to steal it). Well, I like to do my bit! Lets wait for the other guests and then enjoy the evening. Cheers.

Since no-one else has volunteered, I'll go next. Now picture the seen: I'm urbane, sophisticated, have just had a fantastic hair cut, I'm a better raconteur than Jools Holland and let's just imagine I'm well travelled as well (though truth be known, I've never been further than Wales and when I went I though you had to change your currency).

My house is a futuristic terrace and all my neighbours are really important people of note: Koffi Annan, Steven Brookstein, Gary Bushell, Gary Rhodes, Adam Hart Davies. They all wanted to come, but I said no.

I greet you all at the door carrying a tray of Ferrero Roche (sp.?). I'm on the ball, I know how to deliver and this could, by far, be the most exciting diner party you could ever go to... I upon up a bottle of Tesco Finest Champagne (rated better than most of the supposedly better champagnes going). So, what's on the menu? Well guys and gals, I hope you're hungry because this baby is eight courses of perfection:

1st Course -Appetizers

Petite Parmesan Baskets

and

Mini Fillo Shells or Won Tons
filled with spicy lemon zest chicken salad

2nd Course
Seafood

Seafood Salad with a zesty Cocktail Sauce

Vegetarian alternative - Tofu and spicy beans


3rd Course
Sorbet

Grapefruit Mint Sorbet

4th Course
Soup
Butternut Squash Soup

5th Course
Mesclun Salad

6th Course - main course

Lobster Tails. Vegetarian alternative at this point Linda McCartney sausages

Hasselback Potatoes

Julienne of Fresh Snow Peas and Carrots
Tomato Rose Garnish

7th Course - Dessert

Small Chocolate Cake Rounds

8th Course
Lattes

So people, lets relax and enjoy...
:-)

I really enjoyed watching that episode of The Equaliser and the Weetabix Encyclopaedia of film studies was fascinating. Eska, the zebra print couch is divine, so much so, that I would have given you 10 out of 10. However...the menu was just a bit too fancy for me and the trifle I helped myself to had gone off. Sneaks was also giving me evils all night long. So, I'm going to give you 7/10, or 8/10 if I can borrow your Paul McKenna book?

Sorry, Eska, I was too busy routing round in you living room land looking at your CD collection. Hmm, what have we here...Susan Boyle: I dreamed a Dream, PJ and Duncan: The Best Of and, oh my God, what's this DVD...Paul McKenna - I can make you the perfect dinner host. Tut, tut, Eska, that's cheating.
Let's move into the the cellar. Oh, a wine rack but wait, there's nothing classy about the bottles on it... a 3 litre bottle of White Lightning, a bottle of Cassini, several bottles of Lambrusco and, oh God, an entire crate of 20:20. Better get out of the cellar and move into the kitchen...
Well, I must say, I find it rather distracting in here - there seems to be a constant rattling noise. What could it be... Well, I suppose it helps make your idyllic farm house seem rustic, but twin tub washing machines were phased out in the eighties, Eska! Still the George Foreman Lean Mean Fat Reducing Grilling Machine is a good touch. I wonder what meats you have in your fridge that we can cook on that?
Inside Eska's Fridge...Chicken nuggets - Eska, they really should be in the freezer. Reconstituted ham (20 % meat, 80 % water), trifle (please can I have this for afters if I behave?), a raw chicken on the top shelf (Eska, my hygiene level 1 certificate training suggests this should be on the bottom shelf), a half empty bottle of Asda Irish cream, and err - what's that smell? Mouldy tripe! Eska, get that fridge cleaned out!
I think I shall adjourn to the entertainment room... I wonder what cassette Eska has in her new swoosh music player...let's press play..."You're the air that I breathe, you're the light that I see, when I touch you I scream...yeeaahhhrrr!" Stop quick! Eska, I'm not much of a fan of Adam Rickett! Ouch! Just tripped over an aerobics step! Eska! Oh, I see a a 1950s wallnut dash TV with VHS player in the corner. I wonder what she watches? Wow, it's an Episode of The Equaliser - and doesn't Edward Woodward look young? I think I sit on the zebra print couch in the corner of the entertainment room and watch it. I hope the other guests don't think I'm being ignorant.
So far, I'm enjoying this dinner party. It seems Eska is a character or quite unique taste and exceptional character. Ouch, what am I sat on? A book? Hmm...The Weetabix Encyclopedia of Film Culture. Oh, and another one...Paul McKenna: I Can Get You Your PhD.

Ohh, this is intriguing. What are the conventions, as I've never watched CCDWM before? Do I just have to sit down and eat it now, or dazzle everyone with witty repartee and interesting anecdotes? By the way, probably because of where I live and the palette I've been brought up with, but I don't know what half that stuff is...:$

Whats a whizzo stereo??

Natassia, I think it's one of these:

http://futurebrain.free.fr/wp-content/windowslivewriteranotherannoyingtrend-3149ghetto-blaster-051216035418598-wideweb-300x3752.jpg