I don't think it would be detrimental to my work but I'm 100% sure how my supervisor will feel about it. :S

Hello! I'm in my first year of a PhD in Psychology and I'm seriously considering moving back home to live at my parents for the rest of my PhD. I'm currently living in the city where my uni is but I probably spend at least as much as my time back home (2 hours drive away) as my boyfriend lives there. This is my second year at the uni (I did my Masters there too). For nearly two years I have lived in the city but I still feel no connection to the city or to the university department particularly, although I am very much enjoying my PhD and it seems to be progressing well. I also have a good working relationship with my supervisor and a couple of girlfriends who I often have lunch with. But I really would prefer to commute from my parents house. That way I could see my boyfriend way more and save tons of money on rent. At the moment I am paying £550 a month on rent and I'm not there half the time! If I lived at home I wouldn't pay rent and the only money I would spend would be on travel. Do you guys think this a reasonable option for me? Advice would be appreciated!

Hi 4matt. Firstly I would like to say thank you for writing such an honest post. I am sure you can see from the number of replies that many of us have empathy for how you are feeling, as we have experienced it too. I'm 27 and just starting my PhD and so I will be 30/31 by the time I finish mine too. I started my undergraduate degree at age 18 and finished at 21 and after that I lost my way. I was distracted from my career ambitions because of a negative and self-esteem damaging relationship and after that relationship ended I partied too much to distract myself, all the while working in low paid telesales positions which made me miserable.

By the time I was 25 I was feeling pretty depressed about the years I had wasted and was thinking I really needed to get back to uni and carry on with Psychology, as I had got a First in my undergraduate degree and also had my dissertation published in a prestigious journal. Psychology had always been my passion and something I was good at! Luckily I had stayed in touch with my supervisor from my undergraduate dissertation and he felt that I was wasting my potential in the jobs I was doing and he kindly put me in touch with my current supervisor. Now I'm on a fully funded 1+3 PhD (just finished the MSc part) and I finally feel, at age 27, that my life is back on track.

Admittedly, I'm not in a relationship and I am certainly in no financial position to buy a house, but going back to uni has made me so much happier. I doubt that staying in that awful telesales job would ever have given me the confidence to find a good relationship or the money to buy a house. I feel lucky that I'm back on track now, even if it is a few years later than would have been ideal. That's the way life is! Sometimes other life experiences get in the way and we go off course. I guess the important thing is to look at where you are now and what you have learned along the way. I know depression can be a terrible and lonely experience and if you have managed to fight that and come back stronger you should be proud of yourself. Just remind yourself of how far you've come! :)

Also - some people go back to uni at much older age than we are (my mum included - she went back and did an MSc in Social Work aged 43). I think you should try and fight this idea of 30 being 'old' - I know this is what the media would have us to believe but if you plan to live to old age then 30 really is still young!! :) I even still go clubbing every saturday :) There is no rule to say that everyone has to be married and settled down by 30. To be honest I think some of the most interesting and strong people I know have not conformed to that ideal. Imagine how boring and dull the world would be if everyone followed the exact same life path?

I think you should try and make effort to socialise in some way every day, even if it is just a quick coffee with a fellow student or a glass of wine in the evening with a friend. By being out there in the world you will see that other people are struggling with their lives too, nobody is perfect. Being around others should lift your spirits too.

Good luck. Keep your chin up :)

Minnie xx

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I believe that they are used for supplemental information that might add to the point you are making in the text. For example, in the results section of my MSc dissertation my supervisor suggested that I could use a footnote to detail some extra analyses I had carried out (which were insignificant and therefore not THAT relevant). However, I must say I am yet to use a footnote in any other essays or papers I have written as I am unsure when they are appropriate! Are you studying Psychology? If so you might check the APA manual and see what advice they have on footnotes.

Anyone else have any ideas/guidelines concerning footnote use? :-)

Hi Purplecat, thanks for the reply! I am on my summer break now and start the PhD the last week of september. I think I did pretty well on the MSc despite working from home, getting mainly distinctions. I haven't found out the results of my dissertation yet so fingers crossed I did ok!

I'm still feeling a little anxious about the office situation. I asked to move offices for my PhD but unfortunately that wasn't possible (I was informed there was nowhere else for me to move to). So I will be staying in my current office for the next 3 years! Luckily the person who was making most of the bitchy and sarcastic comments has now finished her PhD and so she won't be there to bother me anymore!! :)

I still feel under some pressure to be in everyday though. My supervisor hasn't directly said she would like me to be there every day but has hinted that she doesn't want me to feel isolated. I think she would prefer I was in more but doesn't feel strongly enough about it to press the issue. I guess I'll have to see how it goes.... :/


Minnie x

Thank you so much for all the supportive replies! :)

I think I will just try and rise above it and perhaps send an email to the phd student who is making my life difficult - as talking to her face to face obviously hasn't worked so far! I just felt quite upset yesterday and it has distracted me from my studies the last day or so :( Its just I want to make a good impression so early on in my research career and I worry that this phd student will bad mouth me, although hopefully anyone half decent will be able to see it is more her issue than mine.

I am very self-sufficient and motivated, I just need people to trust me and have faith that I can work well, rather than hassle me or question my methods of working, you know?

Hello all

I've just started my 1+3 route (MSc and PhD in Psychology). So far the Msc is going well, I meet with my supervisor regularly and we seem to be getting on well and progressing with our research ideas.

I have been allocated an office because I am on the 1+3 route, it is a shared office of about 12 people and quite busy, people tend to chat a lot and come in and out constantly. I think its useful to have this office for free printing and also to meet with other people on my Msc and talk to them about assignments etc, however I don't find it the ideal location to study, the noise is too distracting and I tend to concentrate better alone. I have never studied in a busy environment like this, as an undergraduate I always studied alone (in the library or in my room at home).

I assumed that the MSc and PhD would be similar in that respect to undergraduate, I thought I would attend uni for seminars, meetings with my supervisor and sometimes for School social events/coffee mornings but spend a large proportion of time on my own studying at home or in the library. However I feel under pressure from one of the other PhD students to spend more time in the office. Everytime I come in she makes sarcastic comments about how nice it is to see me in the office etc and makes a huge deal about how little I am there. I usually go in a couple of afternoons a week for an hour or two, just to check in with the other Msc students and print things, check emails etc. Sometimes I drop by between meetings or after lectures too. I always make an effort to be nice to everyone but I feel like this PhD student doesn't respect me at all, the way she talks to me makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong by not being there everyday, when in fact I am working just as hard at home and my supervisor is happy for me to work from home as long as I attend meetings and seminars etc and spend a little time in the office to network with other people. Its getting to be awkward with the sarcastic comments she makes to me in front of the others and even though I have explained to her that I concentrate better from home she still keeps hassling me about it. I spoke to another girl in the office today about it and she wasn't supportive at all, she just said maybe I should think about coming to the office everyday!

I really don't want to change my whole way of working just because of this PhD student who is harassing me. I appreciate I need to make effort with others in the department, but I want to do this by attending seminars and social events and networking in my own time. I don't see why I should be forced to do a 9-5 Mon-Fri just because some of the others do, especially when my supervisor has not asked me to do this.

Any advice would be great!
:)