I got home from France tonight, moving home for the final few weeks so I can hand in the second I'm finished, and I went to say hello to my little goldfish and discovered an imposter in his place! It seems my fish died last week when I was away, and my parents didn't to tell me over the phone. They also got a new one just in case I wouldn't realise....right.
An ex boyfriend bought me my fish years ago during my undergrad, I've had him for about 5 or 6 years and although he was a bit of a bossy boots and tortured every other animal that went into the tank with him, including headbutting a slurpy fish and torturing a snail, I loved him. Cos he was that little bit mad. And he had lipstick, a little red line that went across his top lip. I'm totally gutted :-(

I'm not sure if I can ever bond with the new fish in the same way...sounds ridiculous and pathetic, but every time I look at him I think it should be Sharky... Not really sure why I'm posting this, just wanted to share I suppose..

...*a fishy tale if ever I heard one...and a sad start to the weekend for you...a pet's a pet and, in many ways, a family member. In fairness, your parents tried to do the right thing in getting you a new fish and I think they did the right thing in not telling you as in reality you were away and there was nothing you could do. A good way to look at it is, and it might help you to bond with you new fish, your parents got you him/her because they wanted to save your feelings and because they care for you and love you.

*sorry just couldn't resist.

I'm sorry. My three dogs back home - i cant imagine a single one of them not there. But right now is the time to let yourself think of the little goldie in the tank, who has no idea of the standards he has to live up to, no idea of the space he must try to fill, and most - no awareness of how bad he looks without any lipstick.

But it isn't his fault, so sooner or later you'll warm to him.

Oh Algae, what a rubbish way to come home :-( I'm so sorry.

I think pets are so much more than people realise, they represent all sorts of things about us and our lives (especially when they carry history the way Sharky did), and I think we often grieve what they symbolise as well as the pet themself.

Apologies if that's a little deep and mystical, it's 3.30am and, a lover of all things furry at any hour, I am especially prone to waxing lyrical about them when sleep-deprived and somewhat emotional!

You'll come to love the new goldie as well, he'll never be Sharky, but he'll have his own character. And as bug says, you must be kind to him so he doesn't grow up with a complex about his lack of lipstick, otherwise you'll have a resentful fishy and a hideous therapy bill to pay. (I'm still subsidising the Jungian analysis for my last hamster, I tell you, it's not cheap).

Aww thanks everyone! That really means a lot. My parents think I'm a bit silly for being so attached I think, my mum said 'it's just a fish' :-(

But he was my fish and he was a bit mental and I thought he was great! Dammit he was great! Fact! But you are right, I can't hold it against the new fish so in time I will try not to hold a grudge against him. I have no job when I'm finished so I can't afford the therapy for him any Eska.. :) Although, we have a big fish pond outside so I'm tempted to put him in that, might be better if he has company. Sharky killed any other fish that was put in with him so that's why he was on his own, but I think normal fish might prefer another fish to chat to!

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AAAAAaaaaaahhh, what a character Sharky sounds to have been: a cross-dressing cage fighter. No connection to Katy Price by any chance?

I'm really sorry you've lost him Algae, and perhaps the pond is the best place for the new one. It'll be less of a reminder for you and more sociabe for the fish.

If it's any consolation this post has inspired me to get a fish - probably a gold fish when I've finished re-vamping my flat. I think I may call it Algaequeen.

Sorry to hear about your fish - when my kids had fish they lost interest, and when the fish died they didn't notice for a week!:$. On a slightly different note, a couple of weeks ago I came downstairs in the morning to find a fish on the carpet - we have cats and they do tend to bring such things in. I left it there whilst I took the dog out for his walk, fed the cats - not on fish (!) to shut them up, and then went to retrieve the fish ...when I went to pick it up on the spade (plastic toy type, kept for removing offerings from said cats) it flapped its tail. I found a container to put it in and within about a minute it was swimming about again. That fish was out of water for at least an hour or two, and could have been there a lot longer, having been deposited anytime during the night. We have no pond and one pet shop suggested euthanasia, as they said it would die anyway, even though luckily enough we had a full container of rainwater for it to swim in, but we couldn't do that, in the end someone in another pet shop said they would take it home to their mum' s pond. I never thought fish- especially goldfish could live that long out of water. The fish didn't come from any ponds in gardens around here that I know of, theory from on of the pond owners was that a Heron may have caught it and then dropped it. do you think fish have nine lives like cats then?

Hi Algaequeen!

I had aquariums for the biggest part of my adult life and spent a fair amount of time studying and caring for them. I can totally relate with the sense of loss, I suffer too when I lose one of them. If you are more interested in fish and how to care for them here is a very nice forum http://forum.practicalfishkeeping.co.uk/
My all time favourite fish is betta splendens (siamese fighting fish), which is an easy fish to keep and they are amazing characters, a bit socio-path too :)
I hope you won't get disappointed and you will keep desiring their company.. After all a few things are more relaxing than maintaining an aquarium!

That would be amazing Eska!! :-) Thanks everyone, I'm starting to get over it a bit now. I decided it was best to put the little fish in the big pond out the back with all the other fish, there are new additions every month or so, so it shouldn't be a big deal to the old fish to get a new member! I though that if I kept him in the tank I'd need another one cos I don't like having just one on it's own and I'm not ready to get 2 new fish yet. On the other hand, when the boyf and I eventually get out house (in about a million years given I've no job and we don't live in the same country, sigh..) then we are getting a big aquarium with loads of stuff so I shall hold out for that!

The wonder fish you found Joyce sounds amazing though! I really didn't think a goldfish could survive that long out of water, especially given the trauma of being brought to your floor by some animal in the first place!! Hope he lasts ok in his new home!!

It seemed fine, it wasn't small, about 15cm at least and quite rotund which might have helped I suppose. It was swimming about in the container for most of the day as we coudn't deliver it until 5.30, and it was quite lively. There were no visible marks on it - apart from some fluff from the carpet, which it soon lost in the water. It ate some goldfish food too. I nearly went out and bought a pond kit, but thought that was a bit excessive for just the one fish, and might encourage the cats to bring in more. Seems that fish are Ok for quite a while out of water, much longer than I thought.