Had my 1st year proposal presentation today and it went ok until two members of the department (both with a reputation for being tough and everyone prays that they won't go to their seminars) pointed out two gaps I had. Problem is, the way that they phrased the comments was abrupt and just damn right mean in front of everyone.. in fact, one of the comments was very critical and would have been better to have sent in an email and not in front of the whole department! (Grrr, adademics..) Do these overly-critical academics get a high from making new grad students feel really bad about themselves?! :(

I know that more experienced students might tell me to just toughen up and get on with it, but I'm really upset about it and just feel like I'm not good enough after it. My supervisor and HOD were being extra nice to me after it, probably because they knew that I was upset about the whole thing. Think my supervisor thought that I was going to cry on the way back over to the department -which I did later! :(

Anyone else ever have a similar experience? It's really disheartening after working so hard over the last 6 months on a proposal..

Hey chick! It's really normal to feel how you are doing- I think sometimes academics can lose touch with the real world and think that it's actually okay to tear a student apart in front of an audience when it really isn't appropriate. Try to bear in mind that most proposals have holes in them- sometimes it's okay to have holes in them so long as you are aware of what they are and how they might impact upon your results. The way I am approaching my topic is not perfect by any means, and I can see flaws in it, but it's an improvement and a step in the right direction, given that there is no perfect solution to the project I'm doing! So try not to get too disheartened- easier said than done! When I had finished my proposal I had to check the proposed statistical anaysis with the departmental stats guys before I submitted it to NHS ethics. All he needed to do was check the stats were okay, yet he spent 90 minutes tearing my whole project apart, which he clearly didn't understand, and I sat there in tears for about 88 of the 90 minutes. I even got up and walked out at one point, I was that embarrassed that I was crying, then I went back in and he just carried on slagging my project off! I mentioned it to my supervisor (the fact that he didn't like the project, not the fact that I had cried all over the uni stats guy for over an hour!) and she just laughed and said he was a statistician, not a clinical psychologist, and therefore he wouldn't have had a clue what he was on about. It made me feel a bit better but I still cringe when I see him! Try not to stress too much- it will blow over and the guy probably just made himself look like a nasty piece of work and that won't have done him any favours! Chin up :) KB

Thanks KB, makes me feel a lot better :)

======= Date Modified 23 Feb 2010 14:14:51 =======
Don't worry :-) as KB says this is normal and some academics are just utter idiots and completely out of touch with reality! Some are amazing, others.... well.... least said I think ;-)

We've all got holes in our work or our proposals that need sorting, and in a way its good that you hear this now and when you're feeling better can address it - it will only make you stronger. Its just a shame that some of the so called 'experts' seem to be on an ego trip half the time and consider their opinion to be equal to God's, and that as a lowly PhD student you're feelings are worthless. Remember also that the conference world and publishing world can both be pretty brutal, they'll have been treated like that, they forget that our confidence is not what theirs is and it hurts.

Chin up, soldier on, you sound like you've got a great supervisor and HOD and they will help you through this. You're doing great, this is only the first year, and things will solidify, you'll get more confident (I keep telling myself that lol) and in time you'll look back on this and see it as a blip but one that made you that bit tougher and gave you an opportunity to grow :-)