Hey everyone, I just need to rant. I'm a self-funded part-time PhD student (part-time due to not getting funding). I met a fellow PhDer in my department today who was so unimpressed with everything. She told me, in a blatantly 'I'm so not bothered' sort of way that she decided to do the PhD because she didn't know what else to do, and casually applied for funding and got it. I was furious after talking to her! She doesn't care a monkeys about the PhD, and here I am, fighting like mad to be where I am (doing the PhD and working at the same time), and having to come through some rough hurdles to finally get here. Can anyone else relate to this feeling? It seems like the ones who aren't bothered seem to have the best luck (funding, securing lectureships, etc., etc.) [OK--rant over. Thanks for listening.]

Sometimes I think that the level of scrutiny that students and their work are subjected to varies widely, and that occasionally makes me feel like ranting. Some students get away with more than others, for sure.

Eddi,
I know its easier said than done, but I wouldnt worry about what other people are doing, it's of no consequence to your studies. Success in research has a lot more to do with blood, sweat and tears rather than intellence and natural ability.

Sure people who take on PhDs are smart, some of whom are really smart and may border on genius, but the majority of the people ive met in academia owe their success in their PhD and subsequent career as a result of their dedication and hard work more than anything else.

the person you describes is not likely to go very far in academia if they are showing no interest in what they are doing. wait and see

I share a supervisor with another guy at my PhD level. When I first started, he would always drive everyone crazy with the constant self declarations that he was 'the best' in the department. BUT no one would actually see him doing any work. EVER. And anyone who ended up having to work with him, noticed that he never really put too much time or effort into the projects and would complete work that was never really at a PhD standard.

One day, this guy got rewarded with grant money for this project that he bragged “I don’t know anything about and don’t care”. I can relate with your feelings, but I decided to keep pushing myself harder. (i.e. I will win some or lose some).

I agree with rjb203 100%, and I decided that day to keep focusing on my work and continue to work hard because success can be measured in many ways. And as an update: That guy has been running around stressed and burning out for weeks because this project is actually making him work hard for once- on his own-on a project he cares nothing about. He really can’t handle the pressure or the stress and is starting to slip up from “being the best”.

I know it is very sick and evil us to notice and laugh in private, but we all find it hard not to feel justified.

Thanks guys--you're absolutely right. It's just so frustrating to see the apathy when you care about it so much and are really struggling to make it through without funding.

just maybe, this girl is really really insecure and is covering it all up by pretending she couldn't care less.

I agree it sucks, but I think there is something to be said about accepting the unfairness of postgraduate life. I think everyone gets ups and downs, and sometimes bad things happen to good people and vice versa.

Nonetheless, I remember a lot of people saying it was unfair when I got full funding despite being the youngest. However, we were all interviewed the same and had to compete for it before the same panel. I get the feeling that anything competitive makes the losers feel the process is unfair.

True. There is an element of unhealthy competition in some people.

BadHair, I think your barbed comments are inappropriate. It's interesting that you say that 'there's something to be said for accepting the unfairness of academia', yet in most of your posts you have been doing quite the opposite (ref. supervisors, the frustration of being unable to find work post PhD, etc) I'm not attacking you, I just think that your posting was unjust.

I hope my message wasnt seen as malicious. If so I apologise Xeno.

As for the stuff that has happened to me, I have found it helpful to just accept some of postdoctoral life is "unfair", but also to challenge my assumptions. The world does not owe me a tenured professorial position and ultimately, I chose academia myself. I can no longer feel pissed off by a position I put myself in.

It has helped me realise what I can work at changing (and focus my efforts), and what I can not.

I guess the things I still rail about are: exploitation of PhD students/postdocs by supervisors and unis, needless ego politics (that CAN be avoided), workplace bullying, the need to equalise the status of research and teaching.

What I have started accept can't change are things like : the laws of supply and demand with regard to the postdoc job market, the need to have to compete for funding, issues around status, human nature in insecure situations.

There are also things I used to think that were unfair, but now am re-evaluating. The "blag" factor was one, where the less than brilliant would be promoted or funded because of their ability to talk, self promote, network etc. However, this blagging is part of any job and are "soft skills" that employers often talk about.

Similarly, I used to get annoyed at those that never seemed to as hard, but its more about working smart than putting in X hours in the library.

None of this takes away from the annoyance that eddi feels, but I guess I am trying to explain why this can happen.