I have just spent a lovely week in France after having quite a stressful few months. I didn't take any work with me and managed to relax. I thought I would come back refreshed but I feel unmotivated and overwhelmed by everything. I have to write a conference paper for the weekend but didn't manage to get much done before the holiday so have a big job ahead of me. I have seen a full-time job advertised which appeals to me and am considering applying but it's not as if I really want to quit my PhD. Maybe once the semester starts properly next week and I start teaching and interacting with people again I will get my motivation back. I know lots of you have had similar periods so I'm hoping some encouraging words might spur me on again. I've also started panicking that in Jan I will be starting my third year and I feel like I haven't done anything major yet.

Hi Pam

Sorry to hear that you have returned from holiday not feeling refreshed. I think that is often the case when you come back to "reality" from the holidays--its hard to get geared up again, when you have had a chance to unplug from stress, and just relax. Its hard to through yourself with joy back into the grinder of PhD work and regular life. Just give yourself time to pick up your usual routine though and in a few days I would guess things will be more sorted than they feel at the moment.

Although this sounds trite, what really helps me get motivated or at least in a mood to tackle my work is music. I love to work with my earplugs in, listening to whatever it is that helps me get going that day. Sometimes its very mellow music, on days when I am very tired, its very NOT mellow.

Is there something that helps you work--music, a certain place to work, promise to reward yourself with cup of tea or coffee or snack...that helps you feel more like working? And then, just getting started always seems the hard thing, once you start doing ANYTHING, any word on a piece of paper, and you are on your way. Its that first step that is the hardest. Sometimes I almost "bribe" myself to the desk to work, buying a coffee I don't need, or having some chocolate, to reward myself for working. Work has to have its rewards, meeting goals need a pleasant and positive reinforcer...sometimes you are left on your own to find that!

I hope you feel more in the swing of things soon!

PS

All else failing trying to find something that gives you a laugh...some sort of boost to make you laugh out loud...can do wonders for mood. Psychologically and physically, laughter brings a certain kind of stress release. For me, it was going insane for a few days about pirates ( the evidence sadly scattered on threads through the Forum)--but something so simple as Talk Like a Pirate Day last Friday helped me get back into the mood to work. Arrrrrrrrrrr !

I usually feel like that after a break, but after the first week back I'm reminded of why I'm doing the PhD and my motivation returns. It's usually a mixture of seeing my colleagues again and settling back into a routine for the new academic year.  Teaching undergrads reminds me why I like my subject - as you said, it's the interaction with others. The students are usually so enthusiastic and interested in anything new, and it's quite infectious, so my research becomes vaguely relevant again, not just to me but to others too.

You could apply for that job you saw, and see what happens - you've got nothing to lose. If you got shortlisted for interview, it might help you to decide what you really want to do. If you were offered the job, maybe you could finish your PhD part-time if you want to do both. Alternatively, you might plump for one or the other choice, when you have to make a decision - maybe the PhD will turn out to be what you really want to be doing after all.

Also, don't panic about how much work you haven't done, but use that horror to get stuck in and start writing or researching. It would also be a good idea to speak to your supervisor about it, so you can decide on a plan of work for the rest of the year. That should keep you on track and stave off the panic, and it may actually reassure you that the work you've done to date is perfectly acceptable or normal. My whole thesis only started coming together properly in the last year when I started writing up, I was surprised how actually getting on with my writing helped to crystallise my ideas.

Hope you get your motivation back soon anyway.

Whats a holiday?

It's the first holiday I have had for years and the first week off I have had since I started my PhD nearly two years ago! I needed it!

The same thing happened to me when I went to Paris recently. I thought I would come back motivated, but ended up taking an extra week off and spent the time at home playing Call of Duty on the PS3, and then I was relaxed. Maybe it's a France thing?

I think you need to not only go abroad sometimes, but also take time to relax in your own environment. I know that if I am at home relaxing I always have the thought of work in the back of my mind and always feel guilty for not studying all the time! Don't worry you are not alone Pam!

SL
;-)

You need a minimum of two weeks. One week to allow the stupid PhD thoughts calm down and another to actually enjoy. But ultimately, you (and I mean that in a general sense) won't ever allow the brain to relax until the damn thing is wrapped in chains and thrown off a short pier!!!
I suppose the best thing to do is just accept that you lack motivation at the mo, do some tasks that don't involve too much effort (filing) and as you get into reading again, it will return as you find interesting stuff again.
Just to put it into perspective - if anyone on the forum can say that their supervisor took less holidays than them, I will buy them a baker's dozen of Innis & Gunn! :p

ah the H-word. I haven't had a holiday in 5 years... :-( Sorry to hear you didn't feel refreshed Pamw. Perhaps 1 week was not enough. I wonder if how you feel now could be related to a subconscious panic of having a holiday finally while you were away... not knowing what to do with that free time.... and the expectation of being refreshed at the end of it.

Hey Pamw, I totally know where you're coming from. I've just had a week away on holiday (my only full week off so far this year) and I found it wasn't enough time to relax at all. I wasn't refreshed when I came back, just full of dread and overwhelmed. I think people are right that maybe a week isn't enough to relax and refresh. Maybe its a good idea to have a week on holiday and then a few days off, or a week off afterwards where you just recover totally and don't do very much at home. I appreciate that when you're doing a PhD, its hard to do nothing and relax, as you end up thinking about your work and end up stressed and feeling guilty, so maybe pleasant distractions may also be an idea. Just make sure its nothing too tiring. Also I try to set myself something to motivate me which isn't work related. For example every other month or so I spend a whole weekend (sometimes a long one) going back to my home town to visit family or friends. Maybe you could do something similar that you can work towards. For the record I start my third year next month, and I'm sure I speak for many when I say we all feel we haven't done anything major, but from many success stories I've heard, it all comes together in the third year. There is time yet. So.. chin up and don't give up! Hope you feel better soon!:-)