I started my PhD in October and I really struggled at first with the lack of structure and was also terrified of practical work. Now 3 months in the practical work is definitely less scary however I’m still struggling with the lack of structure. When I applied for my PhD I didn’t have to write a research proposal or anything as the project was already set up. My team had also just received 2 nice big grants as well! However I’m really struggling with how the team seems to be organised. Basically the group works as an ensemble group so everyone is pretty much involved in everything. Now in theory this sounds great as there is the potential to get my name of some papers quite quickly etc. But I’m struggling to see where I fit in, I’m not in control of anything.

I appreciate that it’s early days and I need to learn techniques but I don’t really seem to have “my project.” I got a bit confused in one of the lab meetings about an experiment that had started the same week that I arrived in the lab; my supervisor was asking me about it and I asked whether this experiment was part of my PhD project. He seemed quite put out by my question and I think he thought I came across as selfish, he told me no one “owns” the experiments and if I required this one for my PhD then maybe I would use it but if my PhD went off in a different direction then I might not. Basically I feel like there is a lot of lab work happening that I help with that would be happening regardless of whether I was there or not.

At the moment I’m trying to do a lit review after convincing my supervisor to give me a title and trying to get some structure, the lit review is basically going to be made of 3 separate smaller essays. I’m supposed to have tried to write the second one over xmas but it hasn’t happened – I have absolutely no motivation for it and would rather mess about on the internet or stare into space whilst my brain turns to mush. It sounds like an ideal situation in the lab as my supervisor is a really nice person and the lab is getting results etc. but I feel like I’m not contributing and there’s really no point to me being there. Any advice (or just a good slap!) is welcome! Many Thanks.

I think you do need to have a project that is largely yours even if the lab is working together on an overall project (strictly speaking that is expected). There is a trend in some labs to get people to work on stuff irrespective of whether it might be part of their PhD or not. Sometimes that can mean doing a lot of work that isn't helping your own thesis at all. It can become hard to dig out your own project from the collective mass.

If I were you I think I would talk to my supervisor about what your own thesis is going to be about. Yes it may change direction - but you should have some direction to start from. That's not unreasonable. Perhaps you could offer suggestions. Actually it would drive me crazy to be in your situation (but I know other people who have been). Perhaps you try to explain that a better sense of what your own contribution will be will be motivating for you - but stress that you understand that the lab works collectively overall.