oh dear, radicalann, it sounds a bit like you are upset about what's happened plus you are upset that it makes you upset. don't be! (i know that's easy to say). upsetting things have happened... so be upset, rant about it, complain and whine... it's really unfair, isn't it!
go get the hugs you need (virtual hug from me) and hang on in there. things are sure to look up soon!