I started my phd 6 months ago, I'm working as an RA n doing phd part time although spending 85% of my time on my phd. I work 10/11 hr days and most wkends and although I love my research recently I've started to question everything. I recently broke up with my boyfriend as my phd was putting too much strain on our relationship, it's gutting as I love him so much but put my work before my relationship and as a result lost the most important person in my life. On top of this my supervisor has fallen out with me as i questioned her ability as my supervisor. A tad silly perhaps but she is a medic and I am a scientist. I actually have more lab experience than her and am concerned that although I am producing great results I'm not getting the best training. I never have anyone helping me in the lab, have to teach myself every new technique and I'm struggling to keep up- I don't want to be the kind of scientist who can technically do an experiment but doesn't fully understand the techniques they are using. I feel totally lost ATM and am seriously considering packing it all in. Is a phd really worth it? I used to think so. 

it sounds to me that you love your PhD, and you love your bf. I think you need to step back slightly, both can work if you want them to. This may mean giving up your weekends to spend with your other half, not the PhD. It may even mean submitting 6 months later than you wanted to, but if he is very important to you, what is 6 months in the scale of things? I'm sure he would understand if you asked him back - e.g. your under a lot of pressure and stressed, but you want to work it out so you can be with him. Don't sacrifice your life for your PhD because 2 years into it it might be your biggest regret, you will also suffer from major burnout with your current schedule which may mean a whole year out to recover anyway and your health (mental and physical) will deeply suffer.

I'm sure your supervisor will get over your concerns. In the mean time you could ask to go on training perhaps, or ask to be paired with a sort of technical mentor - someone in your department, or even at another uni perhaps that can help to guide you on the practical elements of your research.

in the mean time - try some chocolate for a short term pick me up (gift) (gift)

Hi Jcr8q,

Lab-based PhD tends to take *loads* of time -- people from my department (Bio) work up to 80 hours a week. Having said that, I agree with Sneaks on not sacrificing your life for the sake of your PhD. Balance is the word here. I understand how you feel, and why you feel negative at this time. I, too, work long hours in the lab, teach oblivious undergrads, mark their lab reports and at the same time, trying hard to juggle everything to keep my sanity. It sounds awful but I am (and everyone else is) still surviving. I believe if others could do it, then I could do it as well.

Can't give you any more useful advice -- but remember to prioritize items from now onwards. You can't work out everything at the same time because things tend to fall apart when you try to manage everything. It's the same old saying: the harder you try, the harder you fall.

p/s: I have molecular biology and biochemistry background. In case you need any protocols related to these fields, PM me :)

Thanks to both of you for your replies last night. I'm new to this whole post grad forum and its nice to hear the opinion of other students. Thats another problem really, our lab is based away from the main uni and theyre aren't really any other phd students in my lab so it can be quite isolating, easy to start feeling like you're the only one with these problems. You're both right in the sense that i need to take a step back, booked a holiday and looking forward to getting a break from everything. Thanks again for your advice. Not going to make any rash decisions right now...will stick it our and hope for the best :-)

A holiday sounds like a great idea 8-) Relax and enjoy it!