if i had 67 publications, i actually wouldn't mind going - i would have lived to achieve what i consider my destiny. what would annoy me is dieing at the age of 46 and dying in a way that you've got no time to say a last word to those you love. at least if you're ill, you know its coming so you've got time, when you're shot, you don't even have time to say goodbye to those you love. i think that is very sad. At that age, life has just began - potentially 24 more years of good health etc. but the good thing is that when you're dead, there isn't a chance that you'll be angry. you'll have moved on. the sadness is left with those who are left.