Hi, I am so lost right now... I got accepted for a PhD about a year ago and have for the past 1,5 year been working full-time on a research project which is closely related to my topic. I have now gotten funding to do my PhD full-time and I am about to start on that. My boss from the research project is supposed to be my daily supervisor and unfortunately, she is the worst boss/supervisor I have ever come across. She is never around, and if she is around, she makes me feel like a complete failure. During the project that I was working on, we agreed that I would send her drafts at the end of every week so she would comment and keep track of the progress. I did so but she never commented on anything, not until after a year, when she decided that everything was wrong and bad. Even though I do exactly what she tells me to do, the next day she will have changed her mind and it is all wrong again. When she comments, I cannot understand anything. It is like she doesn't actually read the text. I have spoken to others about this and I am not the only one... She will also speak and make fun of your work in front of others... I have never met another person like this, I usually want to cry when I leave her office :$

I have now worked with research for 1,5 years and I feel more lost than ever. She has convinced me that I cannot do anything good. My main supervisor is very good and encouraging but very busy so I do not have that much access to him. I only have a few days of work left on the project before starting full-time on the PhD but I can't get myself to do anything. I have no motivation whatsoever and all I can think about is quitting, just leaving it behind.

My boyfriend thinks it would be such a waste to quit, I have this great opportunity and I have gotten funding and all... But I just can't see the light in the tunnel. The funding is also tied to me having the daily supervisor I have so I cannot change supervisor..

Any thoughts?

Thanks!

...Probably we are sharing the same experiences, an d I think the solution is not quitting. You need to speak to other people as this can provide a relief.

I had a similar experience when I did a funded MPhil - the supervision was appalling, and was almost exactly how you're describing yours. I know one thing for certain - if you give up, then you'll regret it for the rest of your life.

It's so hard to stay motivated when your supervisor is useless, but consider that you're doing the work 24/7 while they're basically glancing it over every six months or so. This essentially puts them in a very poor position to judge your work. You know your work far better than they do, and you'll instinctively know when it isn't very good. Maintain that standard, and you won't need their unhelpful input. Also, try and find staff at the university who will be willing to look over smaller sections of your work so you can get their input. Another useful thing to try is submitting your work for publication, as this will involve a peer review where somebody theoretically in the know will read it through for you. If you get it accepted, then you'll know that your work is of a good standard, no matter what your hopeless supervisor has to say about it.

These situations are hard, but they do happen often. The key is DON'T GIVE UP. Honestly - that's by far the most common route of "failing" a PhD, and you'll regret it forever!