Hi everybody
I am a PhD student, however my question is not related to studying so much. I live in a shared accommodation. It’s a two double room flat. I am sharing with other person. The Tenancy agreement which we signed was between us as the tenants and the Landlord. My flatmate is a nice girl, however I have fundamental disagreement. The thing is that her boyfriend started to come to the property. It was ok for me until he started to spend 3 days and nights in a week in the property, and even sometimes when she is in the college, I can see her boyfriend making coffee on our kitchen. In the contract we have only two tenants, therefore I’ve asked him to leave the property, however he was very hostile to me. I’ve tried several times to speak with both of them about the agreement and that it is not legal and not fair to me either, because the bills are split into two, instead of three. I’ve reported about that to the Landlord, but he said it is not his business and we have to come to the agreement with the other tenant and her boyfriend. Now I am feeling myself not safe there. I decided to move out, but the Landlord does not want to permit me to do so, because the end of the Tenancy Agreement is in July.
Can you please advice me something what to do in this situation. Should I move out without Landlord’s permission and leave him my deposit? Or this may cause the other problems with the Landlord and may go to the court and start the process against me?
Thanks.

hi there. I have been here before.
1. If the bills are split into three (or some agreement can be made) where your friend's bf contributes, would you continue living there with them? If its just about payments, maybe you could work something out with both of them.

2. If this cannot be worked out and you want to move out:

The tenancy agreement is valid until July, even if you did not sign anything or the landlord scribbled something onto your notepad. English law is strange in that it is valid even if the tenancy agreement was agreed verbally.

If you move out without the landlord's permission and leave him the deposit, he can either accept it OR (as ridiculous as it sounds) he can take you to court (if he knows your identity, full name details etc. and WHERE you live next).

Where you live next means if the letter (of summons) reaches you--then you have to go to court etc.
For example, if you still choose to leave, and the letter does not reach you, then he cannot sue you.

3. You can honour your contract and stay until July..

4. Or if you stil decide leave without landlord's permission, you should write him a letter explaining that you have already paid your share of bills (up to when-and-when) and why you have chosen to leave and that you forefeit the deposit. You may also either pay him one month's rental in advance (!!) or you don't have to. Its up to you. And then, after that, it will be up to the Landlord whether he wants to let it go, or take you to court.

I did no.4. The landlord was not a very nice person (although he was "good" to me because I was a good paymaster). Unfortunately I couldnt live in his house. Good luck.
Satchi

I spoke with a student counsellor about this. I was really in a rotten position, worse than your friend's bf using up all the water and electricity.

Sorry I forgot to tell you. It is also important about the returning of the house keys.
If you decide to leave, you must make sure that the landlord RECEIVES the housekeys, otherwise he may turn around and say something and you'd be totally screwed.
Take care, satchi

I'm afraid to say I don't think I've ever shared private accommodation where this didn't happen. If he is spending whole days there then I think it would be reasonable to ask for a contribution to the bills - problem from his point of view is that he is probably paying the full amount wherever he is supposed to be. Is his place a long way away - could he not just go home during the day? I expect you would me more comfortable if you didn't feel he was 'lurking' all day. I think these two should probably be thinking about moving in together properly - maybe they will in July.

Satchi
Thanks you for advices. Probably I'll write a letter with the explanations why I want to leave and send it to the Landlord, both by post and e-mail. I'll mention that the deposit will be left for him and that all bills from my side have been paid.
I’ll see what he will reply. I think I’ll share updated information with you.

hi again
are u going to send this letter and leave; or you send this letter with an intended date of leaving?
If its the latter, the landlord could turn around and threaten to sue you. Things could get ugly.
Please be very careful about it.
Also, you need to state specific reasons such as "I fear for my life..." "I am feeling threatened..."
You need this kind of justification, well something like this.

In my case, I was generous, I gave the landlord one month's advance rent and forefeited the initial deposit because I was going to break my 11-month tenancy. Friends also told me I didn't even have to pay him that advance rent but after I paid, I felt better because I had consulted the school student counsellor and this (she said) was an honourable option on my part.

Yes please do keep in touch.
Satchi

======= Date Modified 28 Mar 2009 15:31:43 =======
Hi Eugene.

I really feel for you - this situation sucks.

My advice would be to examine your contact thoroughly BEFORE you write to the landlord. Does it state anywhere that you and your flatmate are jointly and severally liable for the property and the rent? The alternative would be that you both have individual agreements with the landlord and he lets the rooms separately (but in my experience, this is quite unusual).

If you are both jointly liable for the property, then you have some leverage over your flatmate because if you move out then it becomes her responsiblity to pay the total sum of the rent, which I don't expect will she will want to do!

If you haven't decided that you really can't stand it there anymore, could there be a way of resolving the problem without you moving out? For example, is it ok for the boyfriend to come round at weekends (or every other weekend and she can be at his in-between) or two nights a week and make a contribution to the bills?

I can totally understand that having him lurking round while your flatmate's not there is creepy, but perhaps your flatmate doesn't appreciate how weird that would be. I think you should also make that one of the conditions.

Maybe you should explain to her (as calmly as possible and when he's NOT around):

- Why you dont like him being there so much (you signed up to live with one other / it's costing you money / it's creepy when he's around during the day and she's not)

- What she could do to improve the situation (limit his visits to a time agreed with you / make him leave when she does / get him to contibute)

-What will happen if she doesn't do this (you'll move out and she'll have double rent to pay / you'll find someone else to have the room and she won't have a say about who she's living with)

That last suggestion about finding somebody else to take the room. Maybe you could suggest to your landlord (if you do decide definitely to move out) that you'll find somebody to take the room and then put a poster up in college / and advert on gumtree.com offering the room until July. The tricky thing about that would be swapping the tenancy agreement over so that you're not sub-letting to somebody you don't know, as you'd still be responsible for the room and it could get tricky.

Good luck and I hope you sort things out!

Thanks Bettyspaghetti.
I did almost everything, you've mentioned in your post: I've tried to speak to her and then both of them several times and tried to talk about bill sharing. What they said, he does not live there (not a resident of the property), therefore he would not contribute to the payments for electricity, internet, water etc. I do not want to pay for her boyfriend, but in fact I do.
I have not mentioned in my original post that Landlord stated to move out I have to cover the costs of his Agent - 570 pounds for finding somebody to replace me and to make the credit check. Although I said I would find the tenant myself, he told me would have to pay that amount of money without any reductions.

Hi I just came home. I'm so sorry to hear about your landlord telling you to pay that £570!!!!
Oh no. That is a lot of money. I hope things get sorted out soon.
Remember, if he cannot find you (your new address), he cannot do anything to you.
Please be careful, take care. Satchi

I think you need to take a deep breathe and step back from all of this.
First of all: it isn't your landlord's problem and why should he intervene in a situation that isn't of his making? I totally see why he has done what he has, and is asking you to pay the costs associated with bringing another person in.
Secondly, when you're in a situation like this everything can quickly get very out of hand. Reconsider how your attitude has been with your flat-mate and her boyfriend. Passive aggressiveness often arises out of such situations. Can you come to a deal, which would be cheaper for all of you. Maybe if you can put some limits in place that fully take account of issues like why he's there during the day when she isn't, then you can make this work until July.
Three nights a week isn't particularly excessive in my book for someone's boyfriend to be around, and in terms of extra electricity/water etc used the impact really is negligible. Even the being-there-during the day is something of a side issue if you can limit it (once per week? when really necessary?). It's nearly April, you've only got 3/4 months left. Try and be pragmatic about it and it will save everyone alot of issue.
The previous comment about your flatmate being liable for the full amount if you leave is incorrect; you're jointly liable which means you could both get taken to court. Mind, shoving in her face statements about legality is unlikely to get a favourable response.

Oh and ultimately the 'try not to let him find you' option is unlikely to be a good one.
(a) he's likely to be able to trace you
(b) it could seriously affect your credit rating

Hi Eugene, probably not the advice you want to hear but I really think you may need to calm down. Do you ever have friends over for dinner or watching tv? If so then you are doing the same thing. At the end of the day your flatmate pays her rent and can invite who she wants to the house when she wants to. The "extra" bills amounted due to his being there is minimal if recognisable at all.

I do agree that he should not be in the house when your flatmate is not there, but I do beleive if you calm down and ignor the situation your life will be happier.

Sorry to be negative but I have seen a similar situation and I think you may be over-reacting.

Hope everything works out in the end.(up)

Hi, I live in a Hall, and right now have I someone staying over (in fact as I type this that person is making dinner LOL!), using our common facilities etc...my flatmate has her BF coming in 2 or 3 nights a week every week, and he cooks and stuff with us in the same kitchen...and it's ok! I know it's diff from a private place, but in our hall we 6 people share a kitchen, dining space, hanging out space..so..just thinking...

If this person is problematic, has personally been a problem factor irrespective of the staying and using facilities business etc, then that's an entirely different issue, but otherwise....

Thanks everybody for your support.
Donzy
That’s a good idea to invite my friends as a reaction to unfair behaviour of my flatmate. Then she will invite her, then I’ll invite strangers from the street… etc. Is it not a “war”?
I have friends and from time to time we have parties in my place as well. It’s normal I think. Same my flatmate does. She invites her friends either.
The problem here is that one person supposed not to live in a flat in fact resides in the premises.

Phdbug
I have very positive experience of living in the Uni shared accommodation. I lived in such accommodation at the first year of my PhD. I really enjoyed that time – 4 of us shared kitchen. Unfortunately we are not allowed to stay in the Uni Halls after one-year period of staying. I think it’s not only the case with the postgraduate students. Therefore I had to move into the private accommodation. Taking into account my previous positive experience of sharing although I must say it’s totally different for me in this case.
What just have come to my mind, at the Halls of residence you could lock your door when you were inside your room, whereas here we do not have any locks (except the entrance door), maybe that’s why I fill myself unsafe with “strangers” inside the flat.