I don't know if this is very common, but I work as a TA for 3 subjects so I come in regular contact with other lecturers/proffesors as well as my supervisors. I have noticed that those people love to make fun of their students. This ranges from undergrads to PhDs. Most common is making fun of their poor academic performance followed by students who are overly clingy, paster them etc. Now quite a few do this openly in front of me and expect me to join in and have a laugh with them (which I uneasily do). What's even worse is when I see them interacting with those students afterwards and they are all extremly nice and pleasant.

Of course now that I'm aware of this I can't stop thinking that I am made fun of in the same way when my back is turned. I have had an especially close relationship with my principal supervisor and now feel like I was wrong to trust her with some personal details of my life. I can almost "see" her making fun of me with her collegaues, but there is no way to know for sure.

Then there is my recent poor viva performance and I constantly worry whats been said about it behind my back. I mean I really thought that academics have beeter things to do.

I guess I'm wondering if this happens at other universities/departments and how do I know when I'm being paranoid and when I'm just being perceptive/realistic? I actually worry about this quite a lot.

lostinoz,
I would say this is actually quite common in academic circles. Ive experienced this in my old department and it is not very nice. My old supervisor does nothing but slag off his staff and students. Ive never really understood what he stands to gain by doing this.

I think some academics dervive a certain amount of satisfaction in belittling students that they feel arn't up to scratch and they do this because they can get away with it. It makes them feel big and important.

I'm not sure that there is much you can do about it. For the most part I wouldnt worry about what people say or think about you. If things are said to your face that are directly hurtful or insulting do take it further, otherwise forget about what is said.

Just concentrate on your research and getting your Doctorate.

Hi LostinOz, have had similar experience- the module leader I was working with as a TA came out for a drink with some of the undergraduate students and myself, but spent much of the time gossiping about one of the students in his classes (which the other students were in, and were also gossiping about him). I think it's disgusting- I tend to find it's people who are very insecure themselves that are the worst offenders, but it's completely unneccesary. I try and ignore it, which is easier said than done unfortunately..

Our dept is bit**ing central - but I have to say it is mainly staff-staff rather than anyone commenting on students. I would consider it to be very dodgy to discuss individual students in that manner.
I think part of it is that academia is so competitive - from an early stage we have to compete against colleagues for pretty much everything - jobs, funding, conferences. It's not particularly healthy.

Why do academics gossip so much?

Because most of them don't have a life, so the only pleasure they derive from anything is getting acceptance letters for publications and funding and the gossiping. Sad.

I've noticed lots of staff-staff bitching, but never staff bitching about the students.

Oh yes, staff too. I just notice student bitching more because I'm a student and thus sensitive to that. My supervisor bitches about her boss constantly (but kisses his ass when they interact in person), bitches about collegues that win awards and thinks they are "undeserving" etc.
I have just been marking exams with one of the lecturers and the whole time she kept saying things like "just between you and me" and proceeds to bitch about one collegue after another..

People who are on about others, whether its students, staff, other colelagues, etc. are not professional at all. Its sad to hear that you have to deal with this. Its a very disillusioning and I imagine upsetting experience. All the more reason to think of the importance of personal boundaries when dealing with students, staff, whomever...remembering that perhaps only a handful will become true "friends" and that the rest might fall at best into the category of "proximity pals" (people that you are friendly with because you share the same space and time, but once that is removed, you have nothing in common).

A supervisor is not a friend--might be friendLY, might be collegial, etc, but the relationship is not the same as with the person with whom you hang out down the pub, that you knew from childhood, etc. I think the issues are the same in the workplace, of any sort, of figuring out what the correct boundaries are. You sound like you are in a place that has NONE--and that is probably a hard environment to be in.

Decide how YOU want to interact with others. If people tell you things that make you uncomfortable, can you politely change the topic and say you are not comfortable discussing other people? Do not repeat things that are said to you--people will figure out quickly you do not engage in gossip and may see you as trustworthy. Keep personal details of your life to a minimum when you interact with other people.

I am very unpopular in my department with some people. This is due to the fact that I refuse to bitch and talk to people directly if there is a problem. It has gained me the respect of some but also the grudge of others. There is a choice and nobody is forced to participate in this inappropriate, unprofessional bitching culture.

Smile and give trivial and superficial details. Your weekends are always "great!" your studies are always " progressing" etc. No one has a need to know more than that. You can be friendly without divulging your personal details.

Personally, as someone else posted, I think that this sort of behaviour goes on when people do not have a life outside of the immediate environment and nothing else to talk about.

If nothing else, you can bore people with the details of your butterfuly catching and butterfly collections. A lengthy discourse on the correct netting on a butterfly net and the need for the right south-southwest breeze to lure in the Great Spotted Flying Whatever might drive people away. Or---a discussion of trout lures and trout recipes could have the same effect!

Olivia, I never repeat things that are said to me which might make things worse as now I'm seen as "truthworthy" and "safe" to bitch to. But you are right that some boundaries need to be set.

I completely agree with olivia on this. Personal boundaries are important and you have to be very careful of what you say to people about third parties ( supervisors, PhD students or otherwise)

This kind of thing goes on whether it is in academia or in industry. You only have to watch "the Apprentice" to see this kind of behaviour in action: bitching, backstabbing and incessant scheming!!!

I find no matter how much a conversation is: " just between us " these conversations almost always end up being relayed back to the person being talked about.

Best advice I was given in this respect: Is to keep your ears open and your mouth shut!!!

I have a friend in the department (another student) who I trust fully. We have agreed to listen for conversations that go around about either of us when we are not there. So far she has reported back to me that my principal supervisor said to a collegue that she can't stand any of her PhD students except for ME. But then again she saw my friend standing within the ear shot so we are not sure that this was genuine. I am sure that my friend will dig something up that I won't like to hear soon enough.

Aghh, I better go and focus on my PhD project.