If anyone who has seen my posts before, they'll know I have had a really hard time with my supervisor, who has done nothing at all to support me in any way shape or form.
I went to my advisor, she shrugged, said 'oh you know what X is like! We all know' and that was the extent of the help from her.
i went to my college advisor (i'm at one of the uni's with the college system), he was very sympathetic, made me a cup of tea and told me to maybe take up a sport...erm, again, no help whatsoever.
I went to my head of Institute, again sympathetic, with same 'u know what she is like' attitude, said it would be best not to do anything because the Institute that i work for is small and it would be best not to rock the boat.
I went to the head of my degree committe, and woo hoo, i thought, he seemed to care. In fact, my supervisor, it turns out, was already being subjected to an internal investigation for fraud (money and data). I'm trying to write up, he said he would read my chapters.

woo hoo, i thought, finally someone to help me. so i hand in my chapters to him and eagerly await an email.
in the meantime, my supervisor calls me in, furious with me. and she screams and yells, calls me a liar, says i have made everything up to discredit her, says she has done nothing but be good to me - more so because i am "mentally disturbed" etc etc etc
(yes, i am bipolar. i take medication and it has NEVER affected my work)
i sit there, stunned.
today i meet with the head of the degree committe.
and guess what?
he hasn't read my work.
everyone knows he has no respect for my supervisor. hate is not too strong a word.
and it suddenly dawned on me that he isn't interested in helping me at all. all he wants to do is get at her and he is using me as a pawn to do that.
i feel like there is no one i can trust, no one who wants to help me. and i don't know what to do. can i really achieve a phd without help from anyone?

I have the same problem with my supervisor! I've seen the same people as you i ve heard the same thinks...you know how he is (..why you choose him?)! and now i am trying to find an escape route...

Obviously the system is failing from the ground up. Your supervisor is incomptent (and possibly insane - so much for her calling you "mentally disturbed"), which is bad enough but not unheard of, but also the safety checks (the other people you've spoken too) seem spineless.

How about your funding body (if it is externally funded)? They have an interest in making sure you get a decent place to work. Or your student rep?

Good idea about student rep Juno. I think that is worth a go. Do you have an independent person who is responsible for postgrad students throughout the Uni? It might be worth finding out. I did not know we had one until recently. It is helpful as this person is not in my discipline so I could have gone and discussed such problems in confidence if I had needed to.

Hope you get this sorted. What your supervisor said was completely out of order.

Can you take on an additional supervisor or help from a postdoc? Just get the help from somewhere else and only see her when you have to.
Maybe you have grounds for a complaint on discrimination, or on refusing to read your work (if she has?)
You could leave but then there are problems with references, why did you leave questions etc etc.
Can you change advisor somehow, I realised too late I wasn't totally rubbish just had quite aggressive advisors.
I have long-standing depression/anxiety but have kept it from my supervisor as didn't think it would help me.

I can't help thinking that people just close rank and there's not a lot you can do. I talked to a postgrad advisor about my supervisor, turned up to a committee meeting and someone I hadn't told was aware I'd made a complaint...which I hadn't, I was worried and asking for help, I thought in confidence.

this is actually a very common thing - i find that when i speak to advisors about my supervisors IN CONFIDENCE, my supervisors dramatically change their conduct and become better, or coincidentally reply the email i sent last month the same day. i have come to believe that student confidentiality is not respected in universities. its best to speak to an external counsellor. do you have a counselling service in your uni? they help you deal with how you react to your sups and how you can work with them better as opposed to changing them. this has helped me. maybe you could try it?

Thanks for all your replies, it means a lot to have support from people here.
As for student rep...well, thats me! I have raised issues (and not actually said it was me) about how people who have troubles with their supervisor find it very hard to get any help. It was "noted" at the committe meeting but nothing ever done.
As for my funding body, yep, tried them as well after I found out that she was denying receiving money for me to attend a conference ( she had of course, but denied she knew anything about it, despite me going to her with the terms of my studentship, then going to the accounts department who got in touch with the head of the Intitute...still nothing was done, they accepted my supervisors reasoning that she simply didn't know. I missed the conference deadline and then she said the money had been spent elsewhere for me...i asked on what...she said "scientific supplies"...i asked such as...? I got yelled at.

I've been seeing my Uni counsellor since I started my PhD...she has been absolutely fab, listens to me cry etc, suggests things that I can do, (like u lovely people have), but again, every avenue I try comes up with nothing.
I didn't want her to know about me being bipolar. But we had to sign a disability declaration, and because I would need time off to have counselling, see doctors etc, I said that I did. MY undergrad supervisor also mentioned it in my letter of reference, but in an altogether different light - that it was incredible to believe that I had these problems because my scientific work was so good etc etc.
As for quitting, I have come close so many times. But now I've done all my bench work and I'm writing my thesis and I'm so very close to finishing. I just feel so let down after I found someone who I actually thought was going to help me.

cc - " I was worried and asking for help, I thought in confidence."

Exactly. All this has blown up in my face and all i wanted was someone to help me.

I think this is testimant to my lab. In the last year, all of the postdocs have left (8 in total), all of them on bad terms with my supervisor. She has 2 new postdocs now who come from completely different and totally unrelated fields - the reason? Everyone in my field knows what she is like and she can't get anyone to work for her.

That is such a pain. It sounds as if you are almost there to be honest. The fact that so many people are leaving is vrey telling. It is not right but sadly this is not the first time I have heard of such circumstances in academic, and I doubt it will be the last.

I am glad that you have got a great counsellor, I am sure that helps a lot. I don't know what else to suggest, other than just try and hang in there. The whole situation is completely outrageous and it sounds as if you have done an amazing job of dealing with it so far.

How far are you off submitting?

I don't know if this helps (please ignore me if it doesn't!) but i have the following posted up on my wall. It helps me find inspiration when it all gets too much for me...

"A PhD is an exhausting, emotional struggle. You are forced to confront all of your fears, insecurities and doubts you have about yourself and some how overcome them. It’s terrifying. A lot of bravery is required, which often goes unrecognised and unrewarded.

Facing your own personalised set of fears (or ‘demons’ if you want to be dramatic) is where the feeling of isolation comes from – the fact that they are YOUR fears.

Be brave. You know what you have to do – you know the right thing to do. Good luck."

Fluffy - well, I think about 4 weeks off. The thing is, absolutely no-one has seen a single thing that I have done, and not for a lack of trying on my part! I've tried ex-postdocs, but no luck there either, I think they are all glad to be shot of her and don't want anything else to do with the lab, including me. It is an underestimate to say the lab wasn't a friendly environment!

Wow, Sim, that really struck a chord with me. I've never heard a better description of what it is like to do a PhD!

It's all part of the training... to become a fully autonomous independent (depressed and lonely) researcher.

I learnt that it's all about you, the examiners and the publications reviewers/editors. No-one else gives a damn about your work.

My supervisor dissappeared after 12 months and my replacement was always abroad. I saw him every 6 months.

My lab/office was like the starship enterprise, except everyone was a 'spock'. "It's totally illogical captain".