Dear Guys,

Thank you for helping me out. It's very kind of you to answer.

Hi guys

I'm a PhD student in my 30s who was working within the environment field. Due to my avid interest in this area, I successfully applied for a scholarship to study abroad. However, due to bad supervision, corrosive work environment and lack of support, I have been unable to complete my Phd on time within the financing period. My supervisor has allowed me to continue my research on a part time basis when I return to my home country but I don't know if I want to continue studying with the professor after my scholarship is over. I have problems communicating with him to be honest and I lose my nerve every time I talk with him. It's like whatever I do is never good enough. Furthermore, I don't know how to balance work and research correspondence with my supervisor once I am back home.

I am very humiliated because I don't know how to explain the loss of a Phd to a prospective employer and also ex colleagues. My confidence is at an all time zero. While the environment field is my first love, I don't know if I should continue to apply for work within this area. I have some questions for those who have had a similar experience on how to handle the situation with grace, humility and self preservation.

a) How does one continue with Phd research once returning home? I am specializing in modelling so I can install the software on my home pc. What steps should I take to initiate and maintain communications with the supervisor? Can any of the forum members share their experiences as how to sustain research momentum based on the effort that I've made so far?

b) If in case I do want to stop, how do I explain the gap in my work experience within my Cv? At the same time, how should I explain to sneering ex colleagues and family members about being unable to complete my studies on time?

c) Should I stop doing research completely? Maybe I'm just not cut out for it. I really don't know because I really wanted to be a lecturer and researcher because of my introverted personality. However, after working with the people who work and studied in this lab, I feel like that I do not have what it takes.

If any one of you has any experience, please let me know as to what I could do to preserve my sanity.