So...how can I get tea stains out of my kitchen worktop?

by replacing the kitchen worktop

Go to your local hardware store and ask them for a tin of Elbow Grease. It's a trade secret (which is why they keep it behind the counter) but it works on so many applications.

Does salty water work?

have you tried hot water and bicarbonate of soda?

Bleach?

A cream kitchen cleaner should do the trick!

Cilit Bang! bang and the dirt is gone!

Thanks guys, I shall work my way through the suggestions (except bleach which I already tried, and elbow grease - my grandmother already tried that on me when I was nine )

Failing all of the above, how about staining the clean bits to match?

That would be a lot of cups of tea