Hi All.

I'm currently two months into my PhD and already I'm concerned. I never felt anxious during my undergrad degree and MA, but I can feel my anxiety levels escalating already.

I got a first on my BA, a distinction on my MA, and was accepted as a PhD student and awarded a full AHRC scholarship. All sounds promising, right?

My problem is that my uni didn't like my proposed PhD topic, but I was accepted and funded on the basis of my academic record. I had an horrific summer for personal/family reasons, but managed to submit the MA diss on time. I hoped to finish the diss early, which would have left time to contemplate a new PhD topic. Instead, I started the PhD not knowing what my topic was. My supervisors were perfectly accommodating (no complaints there) and asked me to produce a new proposal. A fortnight later I met with them again, and they asked that I work on the proposal some more. I did this, met with them a week later, and I was asked to produce another proposal. I've done this and forwarded it to them, but I'm not happy with it and feel like I'm scrambling to define a research topic that is viable and original.

Already I'm worried my supervisors are thinking they made a mistake with me (sometimes you intuitively know something). It's the impression I've got based on our meetings so far (as both seem far from impressed). I'm concerned that if this continues my scholarship will be in jeopardy and I'll have blown what is probably a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity (I doubt I'll be offered a full scholarship again if I fail here).

Am I simply being neurotic? Are these anxieties/processes normal at this early stage? If it's simply not happening is it logical to get out now? All advice is appreciated.

just to assure you, this is VERY normal. i changed my topic almost 4 times before i came up with my final phd topic. what you come in with is not necessarily the topic you submit the thesis in esp if you're in the humanities. the more you read, the more you'll be able to refine your topic sometimes discovering that what sounded like a novel idea is actually not it.

all the best.(up)

my advice is keep it simple.... don't get too theoretical. a purely theoretical thesis is VERY hard..... if you can make it data related so that some words get used up reporting findings... its far much better than following a theoretical argument from beginning to end. in the end, you all get phds.

that's my take anyway. trying to be Albert Einstein is not worth it when things are at stake. you can do that in your post doc. try to keep this phd in your comfort zone. its not the time to try to be clever... learning new techniques of analysis and that. play it to your strengths. it will not only save you time, but also agony... and also place you in a position where you can look at your work and tell whether its good or not.

Thanks for both comments. I'm meeting my supervisors tomorrow, so I'll see what their feedback is. I'm hoping they don't ask me to produce another proposal and I can get on with things. It's a humanities PhD, just to clarify.

I don't know whether to speak to my supervisors about my anxieties? On the one hand, this could prove productive (if they offer suggestions rather than thinking: "it's your PhD, we don't want to interfere with your choice of topic"). One the other, I don't want to give the impression I'm struggling (which to an extent, I am). This probably all sounds somewhat naive for those of you much further through the process...

i think its best to be honest. just don't get too emotional while admitting these difficulties. when i got my current supervisor.. (i changed them a few times!) i did this nerve-filled presentation where i lost my voice and totally lost it. i couldn't push my topic anymore so i asked them for suggestions on what they think i should do because my other topic was rubbish - according to them. before i imagined my supervisor wouldn't emphathise but when they saw my struggles they actually came up with a topic for me and asked me just to write... sigh.

so it can help to be honest. in my two sets of supervisors before i'd just acted like everything was alright and after admitting my difficulties to one, they'd taken advantage of it. so it really depends on the person really. its better to find out now what they're like now than 3 years on like i did and had to restart with new person.