Two pregnancy tests, both positive. How did that happen? (only kidding!). I don't want to let it stop me completing my (P/T) masters or applying for a (humanities) Phd and funding etc. Am I being naive? I'm convinced I can write a dissertation while pregnant, and that I can start a Phd with a lit'lun of only a few months old. I'm convinced about this because although I'm incredibly happy about the news, I'm also scared out of my wits that I'll have to kiss goodbye to my dream career. I am determined not to let that happen, not when I've worked so hard. Anyone else facing or dealt with the baby/career conundrum? What happened? did you succeed? am I mad to believe I can do both? Inspiring stories also welcome!
I have a friend who had her first child during undergrad. She then went back to Uni and finished her degree (with a first) and got funding for a masters, which she completed (with a distinction). She then got funding for a PhD. She started the first year of her PhD but is now on maternity leave with baby number two, and plans to continue with PhD once maternity leave over. Her partner is also an academic, with funding for his PhD. Goodness knows how but they've both managed to keep going with their careers and children!
I'm female, about to embark on a PhD but with the knowledge that I also want to have children at one point in the future, so am also really interested to hear about how things fit in!!
Thanks so much for the replies! Sounds like it is achievable, although keeping hold of my sanity at the same time might prove difficult. I have resolved to give it my best shot, especially if others have managed to get funding and are succeeding with small children, although each case is individual. So I'm still going to apply for full funding, and I'm determined not to become one of those mushy mothers who only wants to talk about their kids. Am thinking of starting a blog so I can vent when I get frustrated and maybe offer some comfort to others in my predicament. Thanks for the replies guys, I appreciate it. Am going away now to cry for no reason and pssibly throw up. Oh joy!
Poor you, bad morning sickness? I think it's generally acknowledged that there is never a 'right' time to have a baby. If you want an academic career, then after your PhD you'll be doing the post-doc thing which (in my experience) means you have work just as hard as during your PhD (if not more so because of the multiple projects and the constant striving for funding) so you might as well go for the baby before/during your PhD (accepting that you might take a little longer to complete)! Best of luck with everything!
P.S Have you tried ginger for the sickness? Apparently very helpful - a friend of mine kept ginger nuts by her bed for early am nibbling! Also could try Preggie Pops (Google for an online supplier), I bought some of these for friend of mine who had really severe morning sickness and she said they helped (I suppose she might have said that to be polite though!).
Thank you so much for the advice, Ann. The morning sickness is pretty much all day which is horrible. Ginger nuts are not working, but I'm now trying slices of ginger in hot water. Tastes vile though. I suppose the timing couldn't have been better really. I've only got my dissertation to write for my masters, which is due next and which is already half written (I'm part time, but working on it full time!). So hopefully all the groundwork will pay off now I really need it to. I'm also putting together my research propsal, which is beginning to sound really fascinating (that can only be a good thing!)and hubby is supporting me every step, so really, apart from the sickness, cramps, tiredness and sheer terror of child birth, everything is rosy. Find out next week how many weeks I am. Will post the result in case anyone is interested. Thanks again FF xxx
Mint tea really helps, thanks for the tip! Can't believe how generous everyone is being with their advice!
Would you consider taking a year or two out before the PhD? My friend has just had her second baby and say it has been disruptive to her PhD - the other kid isn't much trouble because he's old enough to go to nursery so she used to get some time to herself
Hi Tanya, I would say go for it. I've just had an hour long chat with my midwife about doing a Phd with a baby, and she herself has done it. She did a Phd is midwifery(sp?)which I understand is very hands on, and she already had two boys. From what I hear it is achievable. I'm not letting baby get in the way of my plans, If I don't carry on, I won't be able to support it in the future, so go for it. Or at least give it a darn good try, at least then if you have to quit you can say you tried. Good Luck!
Absolutely! I seem to be constantly hungry though. Have already gained a good few pounds hehehe. Bring on the chocolate, who says I shouldn't eat for two :)
Hi Cariad, thanks for the reality check. I keep forgetting that a Phd is a huge undertaking and a very scary one. I'm not sure if doing a humanities Phd will make a difference though, most of the people I speak to doing them say the first year is all reading, which can be done at home if neccessary (after that it would be childcare all the way!). Not ideal I know, and I have taken your comments into consideration. Am seeing my prospective supervisor on Wednesday, so will discuss it with him. Fingers crossed he won't think it will be an issue. I'll have to have a major rethink if he does!! FFxx
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