======= Date Modified 01 45 2010 22:45:06 =======
!! UPDATE: Now with improved legibility !!

Dear all, Having read through many should-I-quit-my-PhD threads im afraid that I was inspired to start my own.

I am coming to the end of the first year of my funded PhD. Things have gone well and I should pass my upgrade. However I am having very serious doubts about continuing. I dont want to be too specific but the subject I am studying is Area studies/social science looking at NGOs within one particular foreign country. If I quit I am interested in going to work in the third sector/foreign office/civil service/journalism (business is not an option). The issues that I have been deliberating over are as follows:

I have never wanted to be an academic vs. Im still not sure what I want to do.
I am fairly sure my PhD will not make me any more employable in the areas I am considering vs. Im not entirely sure what these 'areas' are
I will be 28/29 when I finish without house/ savings/wife/baby/car/dog/a suit vs. so what
I dont want to be in the same position I am in now after I finish PhD vs Financial security for the next few years.

I think the main driving force of all of this is that I do not want, and have never wanted, to be an academic (I never even considered doing a PhD till a year ago when I got offered the studentship). I now think I made a rather rash/hasty decision beginning the PhD and therefore is it worth continuing? I have an Area Studies MA, BA history and several years TEFL experience + part-time jobs + 'travel experience' (woohoo!)

Therefore my questions to all of you wonderful people are what do you suggest I do? I have talked to my supervisor (very considerate but advised against quitting) careers advisors (talked about transferable skills, internships etc etc etc but was wholly inconclusive) and numerous friends/family (supportive but non-pushy) but I still cant decide.Its agonizing!

I have been an avid reader of the should-I-quit threads for some time and I would very much appreciate your input, suggestions and advice for my individual case.

Mucho mucho gracias:-):$:-x

I sympathise, I agonised about this too. For what it's worth, here's my thoughts, some of which I did myself:
Foreign office / civil service - there's currently a recruitment freeze, so if that's what you want then you might be better finishing the PhD in the hope that things are better a couple of years down the line. With the journalism / third sector routes how much experience have you got in those fields? Given how scarily competitive both are, you need to make sure you've actually got a chance.
Obviously if you loathe every bit of the PhD then quit, but I'd like to throw a few thoughts up in the air about making it work for you and your aims:
1) If you don't want to be an academic, then the traditional 'must give conference presentations & publish' mantra can be cast aside. Instead, you can try and get NGOs to publish your research reports. Different style of writing to a PhD chapter but definitely no more hassle than turning a chapter into an article. Get yourself onto mailing lists and rather than academic conferences, go to the NGO-organised events and network like mad. As a PhD student, you can become a semi-insider in a way that a jobseeker can't as easily.
2) Use your fieldwork time cleverly. Interview civil servants, NGO folk and why not a few journalists who write on your country.. It's legitimate research but you can also make yourself a known figure in the circles you'd like to end up in.
3) Are you ESRC funded? If so, do that funded three month internship programme in an organisation you'd like to work for.
While the PhD itself as a qualification might not make you more employable, if you do stuff like that you can enhance your cv while still getting the PhD stipend.

Obviously if you're well connected and already have a cv to die for, then these ideas might not be attractive, but given all the sectors you mention are shrinking at the moment, I just wonder whether quitting the PhD is actually a good idea, given you are funded. If the realistic alternative is an unattractive job or crazily trying to fit freelancing, part-time work & volunteering together to make enough to live on, you may as well finish it and build your cv at the same time.

I warn you though - if you do go down the track I've suggested, you may be met with incomprehension by fellow PhDers and academic staff, who don't get why you're not chasing the holy grail of an academic job. But that's liveable with if you don't actually hate the idea of spending another couple of years on the PhD.

Hi JD-Ovengloves,

No one can decide for you-which is annoying for you but is why counsellors are so inconclusive. There is no right or wrong decision really-mainly only a right or wrong one for your situation (as it is at present) situations always change as well. But I'm just thinking here-if you quit now, without work you are really just giving yourself the option of continue with Phd against quit it to go to what.....? Would it not be better to give yourself a bit more time, continue with the Phd but apply in the meantime for work you are qualified for and want to do and see what happens.

If you are successful for a decent post then you really have a genuine choice- Phd or professional employment and whichever choice you make-at least there is a win for you on either side. Quitting a Phd that you are doing well in and are funded for- for the unemployment queue might seem okay now but it could be a miserable place to be in if you were in there for a while, while you were waiting for full-time work to come along. And to be honest, it is probably easier to get work while you are in work or study-having been in an inbetween place for about four months once when I moved cities-even though I had children and was not completely unoccuppied re- things to do and responsibilities-it was really demotivating and quite depressing until the jobs came along and I began to get interviews and an offer. I think that if I had been studying while I was applying, I would not have been quite so despondent when the initial applications were 'sorry but we' or interviews only and no offers.

This does not answer your long term plans and inquiry but perhaps helps you with a temporary plan to go along with while you work out what YOU really want out of life for the moment. But being 28 without all the perks is really not necessarily a big or bad thing, either. We tell ourselves all sorts of things about what we are supposed to achieve in life...and quite frankly we only ever have a small amount of control over our outcomes. Take the GFC for example-who would have known that was on the cards? And it has impacted on lot's of people's lives messing around with people who did 'all the right things' and people who just took life one day at a time alike? So-no right or wrong answers but give yourself more time and possibly apply for work while you continue to study...who knows you may just find your dream job and leave afterall but at least while you are looking, you have an income and a purpose and you still have more than one option.

In my humble opinion you have already made your decision by simply reading numerous threads about leaving study and writing this one (even subconsciously), you know that you aren't happy doing what you are doing. I think you are asking for validation for something you have already decided as Pjlu said "No one can decide for you-which is annoying for you but is why counsellors are so inconclusive". Just my two-cents and here is quote I like:

"Sir, What is the secret of your success?" a reporter asked a bank president.
"Two words."
"And, sir, what are they?"
"Good decisions."
"And how do you make good decisions?"
"One word."
"And sir, what is that?"
"Experience."
"And how do you get Experience?"
"Two words."
"And, sir, what are they?"
"Bad decisions."

Dear all, thanks very much for your really helpful replies. Up to this point in my life I have shunned 'online communities' (Im not lying when I say its my first time posting or adding a thread anywhere).This experience has been a very positive one and I will recommend this site to fellow PhDers and the careers advisor when I see him later today.Not only that but I am also inspired to participate more online as well.So thankyou for that.

My main problem with continuing this PhD (knowing that I dont want to go into academia) is that I have very little experience in the sectors that I am interested in - the only thing that I have 'experience in' is in the the country that I am writing my thesis on - and certainly one of my prime motivations in justifying this PhD was to become an 'expert' in this particular country (to kind of cap-off my highly enjoyable time spent living in that country). This may seem a crazy half-baked idea now but it seemed totally acceptable a year ago! However it does seem that the non-academic sector requires more than this. With this in mind I will certainly look seriously at ESRC internships/distance learning NCTJ courses/freelance journalism/more volunteering (i already do some anyway) if I decide to continue. Re:decision-making time-frame. My entire second year is spent carrying fieldwork out abroad so I feel I have to decide before I book my flights in a month.This gives me a bit of time but its still decidely difficult to motivate myself enough to prepare for my upgrade/complete my methodology etc.nevertheless I shall persevere.

Bewildered - Id love to know what decisions you made and how they played out for you? every PhD case is unique but yours does have similarities to mine which is nice to know

Pjlu - you are spot on when you say there are no 'right and no wrong answers'. I have speculatively applied to a few positions in the third sector although I am not holding out much hope for these.

Intheheadplease - the problem is that although i recognise the fact that there are a host of problems with doing the PhD - there is no way of knowing that I wouldnt find new problems with anything else I choose to do if I quit my PhD. Being mid-late 20's and not having made my mind up about what I really want to do with my life complicates this (I realise there is nothing wrong/unusual about this but it doesnt help!)

I will keep you updated on the decision-asking and any further comments/suggestions/advice would be very much appreciated. Cheers
(up)

======= Date Modified 02 Jun 2010 11:30:27 =======
Sounds to me like you already know what to do, but bringing yourself to admitting it is probably hard for you given that the decision might also involve/effect others. Just be entirely honest with yourself and others concerned (e.g. supervisor, departments, etc.). There is no point doing anything in life that doesn't get you where you want to go, and/or is irrelevant to what you want to do, and/or you don't particularly enjoy/value.
Like one poster said below in the interview, we all make mistakes - this is part and parcel of being human, accumulating experience, and getting things right the second time around. Years ago, I started a BA at a reputable university and struggled to stay motivated, but carried on despite my disinterest. Back then I thought a university education would be advantageous (I still believe this to be the case), and that the field I had chosen was a well-respected one. I later realised that this 'well-respected' aspect of my choice meant that I was struggling to do something that I actually hated simply because I thought everyone else will think it's a worthwhile subject to have a degree in. Looking back on things now I wish I had a mentor to tell me 'Don't do things just because they please others; you can change to another degree that you actually value and will consequently enjoy'. Had I known this I would not have waster 3 years of my life doing something I hated. I'm not sayiing I'm now inffalible, or that I can answer your question correctly. I'm 36, and have made a few mistakes in my life which I'd gladlly share with others if it helps them prevent making similar ones themselves. Quitting that BA, and getting onto another one which I did for my OWN sake and which I valued as an indispensible vehicle to my future aspirations is one of the best decisions I made and I do not regret this one iota. This 'right' decision though would not have been possible without that 'not-so-good' decision which originally led me to do a BA in something I didn't like. In other words, correct decisions are often based on getting things wrong the first time around. Getting things right is a matter of constant re-evaluation and practice.

Don't be afraid to do ask some-soul searching questions and be honest with yourself; it'll help you be honest with others - this pays better in the end than doing something you don't value or enjoy, and which will no doubt come to light one day in the form of a lack of motivation, etc. And depending on what you finally decide, don't be afraid to say to yourself or others that you were mistaken. It's a mark of maturity and honesty, if anything. Best of Luck!

JDOvengloves
Ironically given I spent most of my PhD saying I didn't want to be an academic (and laying the path for a policy-related career post-PhD) in the last year, something clicked and I realised how much I loved teaching university students. So I did a postdoc and start a lectureship in September (I genuinely am feeling very guilty about this, as my more theory-orientated 'must be academics' PhD friends have not got academic jobs on the whole, and it seems really unfair that I lucked out). But I think the 'impact agenda' helped me, as suddenly all the policy-relevant activity I'd been involved in, started to look more relevant to departments. In an ideal world, I'd love to keep a foot in both camps but I suspect compromise will come down the line somewhere.

Hi there!
I was like this in my first year too, really was on the verge of quitting several times. I think it all depends on what your vague idea of what you want to do instead of/after the phd is and if you can still get there if you do your phd. In my case, I didn't have much of an idea, I just knew I wanted to work in an area where I could inform people about science and improve attitudes of non-academic people to science in general, not just my field. I had though initially that I wanted to be a lecturer, not so much interested in the reserach but that was all part and parcel of the job, I just wanted to teach student. Then after a few months in my project I decided I hated academia and this wasn't for me, it wasn't the field I wanted to work in, it was a waste of 3 years which would be better spent training for the job I actually DID want to do...all similar thoughts to what you have mentioned in your post.
I was too afriad to leave though, I couldn't make a proper decision either way, every time I decided right I'm going to leave, there was always a niggling doubt so I decided to stay in cse that was my sub-sub conscious telling me leaving was the bad choice. After a few months I got stuck into field work, and started really enjoying my project and now in final year I'm so so glad I stayed. I had some pretty rough times, bullied by someone in the lab and having problems with losing samples and experiments not working out, but I'm still glad I stayed.
I have had the opportunity to take time to think about what it is I really do want to do, and loads of opportunities to network and meet people that I wouldn't have otherwise have met. I took advantage of the flexibility of working with a Phd and did some volunteering in something I'm interested in but totally different from my field, I joined all sorts of societies and attended meetings which have helped me in meeting people important in other fields.
I enjoy academia now, and would still like to be a part of it, but I don't feel like I could be a full blown academic. I have a great supervisor who has let me flex my muscles in other areas and now I have a better idea, and better qualifications for working in what I've eventually discovered I want to do. I think I would have gotten here at some stage, whatever path I took, but I'm glad I stayed for myself, because now I know what it is to do a PhD, what it takes and I know that I've got it. I have 3 months to submit so I'm sure the worst is still to come, but I feel now that I can handle it! I think that's the best transferable skill out of them all, and one that's often overlooked!