my dads bro passed away last week - the funeral was yesterday bt I am still suffering from it all. I ahve my first year viva on thurs. My supervisors know about it all. I am finding it really ahrd to concentrate on everything and I dont care about the vivia... yet i do care if u get what I mean. Its driving me crazy. Anyone been in this situation? How did u deal with it?

Big hug from me too. Whatever you do, don't punish yourself for not being focused at the moment. As DanB said, it's good that your supervisors know what's happened, and nobody would expect too much from you work-wise at such a difficult time. Be gentle with yourself and allow yourself time to grieve.

I'm sorry to hear that driven2insanity. As death is part of our lives too, try to attend this viva by acknowledging your uncle's death rather than trying to forget it. Because if you hide it, it will come out at the most unexpected time. If you keep the feeling with you, it will become part of you. My father died last year, looking back I remember that I was stronger when I reminded myself the reality. There is no one correct formula for this kind of stuff. I'm sure everyone has their own ways of dealing with feelings. But just allow yourself the right to be upset. Also it would be good to remind yourself that you are ready and your supervisors think that you are good enough to attend the viva. Good luck and let us know how it went, ok?

(((Hugs))) Sorry to hear that, dealing with death of a family member is hard enough without adding the stress of a viva.. I suffered in silence when my gran died during the penultimate year of my undergrad.. Its good you have told your supervisors so they should sympathise with the emotional and unfocused state you must be in.. Like the other guys have said give yourself time to grieve its something you have to do when a loved one dies to gain acceptance of the circumstances.. Good luck and all the best for ur viva

sorry to hear that, the loss of somebody is a very painful exprience and no wonder that you have hard times now. How about talking to some consellour/psychologist (maybe your University has one)?

am so sorry to hear that you are going /have been through tough times recently - driven2insanity and 404. all i can say is i will remember you in my prayers.

Driven2insanity - (having no experience of losing a really close family member) I would suggest that you listen to yourself. If you feel ready to handle the viva, go for it. If you don't, give yourself time to grieve and postpone it, it will come up later as 404 said.

JoJo.

thanx for all ur support. They were nice to me in the viva. They took everything into account- supervision problems and the bereavement etc. They said that they wanted a bit more work on the report before they would sign me off. I am really annoyed but I think i expected it. Really angry. Thanksfor ur help.

Try not to get wound up about the viva result. You'll pass it no problem in the future and can't expect yourself to give top quality work at this difficult time. They obviously think you are capable of passing but feel it needs a bit more work (which was not possible right now given the circumstances). I wish you all the best and hope that you can concentrate on what is important at the moment - working through your grief and being kind to yourself.