I'm in my first few weeks of a phd that I honestly feel woefully inadequate for, I literally feel like an undergrad again... And cannot honestly see how I can obtain the new knowledge, whilst research and write.

To give a background, my phd is in the cell biology with chemistry elements, although my own experiences have been forensic related, providing me with a chem/bio balance, definitely not the level of cell bio my fellow new phd colleagues have. I interviewed and obviously they knew my background, I was offered the spot, but I seriously lack the kind of knowledge my cohorts have, I honestly feel like sometimes they're talking a different language! Even learning the lab stuff, I'm sure some of them are just looking at me in disbelief!

I cannot realistically see how I can do it, why they'd have found me suitable or whether I truly have the passion to see this through. It's made me so down lately, I think i have had bedtime tears at least 7 of the last 14 days, surely this is an omen?

I did pursue forensic phds in my area, forensic bio, but they are so hard to find, funded anyway, I interviewed for one and was told frankly, they had received 5 times the normal amount of applicants this year, and unfortunately many from individuals who had years and years of experience in industry, looking to career change.

I really do not know what to do, I have found the job market a struggle, and although this phd was my 'fallback' I may have fallen too hard.... What happens if you leave a phd in the first few weeks/months? Do you get hounded for money? Can you ever do another? Should I stop being a moron in only my first few weeks?

Don't judge yourself compared to others, most people start a PhD and feel like they know nothing of their topic, don't be surprised if that feeling lasts for 6 months or so. That's what the first 6 months are for, learning your topic, learning the new techniques and learning all the jargon that people speak in your topic! Your supervisors clearly saw that you were capable or you wouldn't have got the PhD. So just relax and read around the topic and you will soon settle in.

On the other hand if it is that you have found you don't enjoy the new topic at all maybe it's not for you. But again I wouldn't judge this on a few weeks, give it a few months and then decide.

When you start the PhD you are bound to be the little fish in the big ocean again. You feel incredibly unintelligent and don't even know where to start.

As you research and write, you obtain knowledge. It's not a process that is gained by direct correlation, rather, it's a slow process. I find that after having done the PhD (under examination) I know heaps more than I did when I started, and I don't even know how I got there! It takes time.

See how you go with some of your lab work and writing. It can take a while to settle in, and you'll have massive ups and downs with it as well.

Hi Catnip,

I have just submitted my PhD after 4 years of hard work. Similarly to you, I did a PhD that was out of my depth. I found myself in desperation in many stages of the project, especially in the first few months when I had to build up my knowledge. It is doable with the right support, and also be smart when you define the aims and objectives of the PhD. In your case you need to stress that the main contribution to knowledge is the interdisciplinary nature of your work in the sense that you can pull chemistry and biology together.

You need to be very careful when choosing examiners or when choosing journals to publish. You won't aim for a pure chemist or a pure biologist because they definitely know more than you in their discipline. You should find someone with a similar background that understands the novelty of your work.

I do think that this kind of PhDs are increasingly common.

Keep reading and keep learning.
Good luck :)

Thanks very much for the replies, and it's come as immense reassurance!

I will take the advice and see how things progress, and it's nice to know that I'm not the only person to feel like this. You have all made me feel a little more relaxed and confident, whilst the depths are still currently deep, I'll just need to ensure I paddle a little harder, and not get too overwhelmed!

Again, thank you :)