I am a first year in PhD and ended by being forced to quit although hard work day and night! But now I am kind of disappointed, I am now 27, I didnot create family, leaving home country and he problems in the past of my family that hugely affect on my mental health, I have OCD and some other health issues. Although every one almost admires my personality in presentating the work. However, I am now shocked, my dream was to good research that could help people really and being memorized even before leaving the this earth. But I found it doesnot look like that. When I was a little girl, I was telling my late mother, I dont want to be an ordinary person, I want to add this world, being important person.
However, I am writing these, I am burst in tears and deeply alone, I get suffered from complaining, so I forget to speak, I get used to keep every thing inside, I am afraid about my family as I am responsible, and I would like to make their life better, but may be the problem in me as I didnot do well like others, I thought I do something new and meaningful, but ended up by kicking out.
I would be grateful if someone tell me how I can overcome this period.
