Hiya- sorry a little rant again.
I'm not sure how much I can take of this rollercoaster journey! One minute I'm fine (like this morning), 5 minutes later I have to pick myself up again after hearing peoples comments, revisiting and remembering supervisors criticisms!
I'm trying my best to keep going- but I feel like bursting into tears!
My supervisor basically ripped some of my analysis (which has taken me ages to do) to shreads saying that I have to redo it all (which made me feel really stupid) having completely misunderstood my sample size. Once she realized what I was saying all along, she apologised- but I'm still reeling from it! Following from which, my team (including my supervisors) failed to include me in a team meeting which my PhD is part of. I spoke with my team and no one thought to bring it up! I've been working on this project for nearly 3 years and now their asking me to prompt them to include them in any future meetings! Now I'm hearing that a collegue/friend of mine will be included in the bigger project after September (when my funding runs out).
Feeling really glum at the mo :'(
I'm planning what my result chapters will look like in preperation for the big datasets to arrive. I really don't know how I'm going to get through the next six months! Any words of wisdom/comments would be great!
Pineapple,
I think we must have had similar experiences. I've spent the last few months going through the rollercoaster as well. Last week was a particular brand of new hell for me - nothing hugely bad went wrong i just think I've had enough. Even burst into tears when one of the 1st year phd's thought he was being helpful pointing out weaknesses in my characterisation work. The spin coater broke and my postdoc failed to look after my cells so destroyed a whole experiment which was very costly to set up, then had my lit review ripped to shreds by my co-sup who I hardly see. I also have to point out that my co-sup is in a scottish uni after moving there last year and my main sup is away on maternity leave so I have no idea what kind of hell i'm to expect when she gets back, as i've been kinda supervising myself and get left out of meetings frequently. Maybe point out to your supervisor you were suprised you weren't included in the meetings esp if the new projects are going to be based on your work!
All I can think of is take a few days off and not touch any work to try and buck your mood up. Its what i'm doing at the end of the week. Otherwise i'm go totally mad. Maybe you could try going out and doing a hobby you've not touched in ages or see some friends who won't mention the PhD and just go have some fun. Hope that helps. ;-)
I've been swinging between extremes as well, including recently plummeting again after some tough chapter feedback. Maybe it's the stress of being so near the end, plus the added pressure of getting things finished before the deadline. I thought things would get easier after the last year or two when I was in the major mid-PhD doldrums (I'm a part-timer). But I'm still swinging, though generally positive. Hang on in there. Good luck!
Another final year phd'er struggling. Submitted first draft of lit rev which was shredded and I'm now seeing my deadlines slip away in the face of corrections after correction. I was expecting revisions but the realty of the criticism is depressing. Finding it hard to write and the pressure of funding ending in September and nothing in the job market for some one in the twilight zone between completion and submission is a constant companion called woory.
Its grim days that seem to impinge on much of my time.
Not much help I know but your not alone (hug)
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