Hello guys,
Sorry for writing for the third time, but I’m in a very important moment! It’s more than one year that I chose a lab for my PhD and now I don’t want to lose the opportunity to study on this field and in this environment! I already had a little project there so the PI knows me, and he gave me some feedback. I thought he was not satisfied about my skills in the lab/intelligence since I couldn’t find the right solution in a project to make it work instead he told me that he liked the work I did but he has some problems with me, that I will write below in order to clarify my mind and try to solve them actively (and preferably quickly):

1) He’s afraid that I can go down during my PhD because I’m not self confident and I’m a bit anxious, but I don’t think this is the main problem because I’m anxious just because I really want to go there and my condition at the moment is uncertain, moreover I didn’t start yet my PhD so I’m sure that it’s something that I can overcome with some experience, proving myself that I can work on my own (Unluckily my previous master project was not very useful on this point of view because I was supervised and I was just following a protocol already developed so I never found real problems to overcome on my own and so I couldn’t actually test myself and increase my self confidence)
2) He thinks that I’m scared to talk to him about things that don’t work because I feel judged. He taught me that a good scientist is not the one who doesn’t fail but the one who can go through failures! I’m sure I can overcome this problem too indeed in the end of my project I showed him what I tried in the project and didn’t work, ok I was agitated, but I did it,so I think it was fine and I will get better!
3) Finally he told me that he has problems of communication with me. I think this is the real main problem because when I must speak to Professors, even at the university during the exams, it happens that I get so nervous that I see just lips moving but I can’t connect the words I’m listening to. When I was younger I really thought to be stupid! Now I know that if I read that sentence, or a friend says the same thing, I can understand it, so at least I know it’s due to the fact that I’m nervous. I was thinking that a first solution could be to ask him if he can please repeat when I “get lost” in my own world. Then I was thinking that I could “imagine” I’m speaking just to a friend instead that to a big scientist, that could help me to concentrate and think. Finally I’m studying hard! Also a friend of mine in the lab told me that this is the best solution! Moreover I like it so I’m happy! (seriously, what’s better than to read a good scientific paper in the early morning when your mind is fresh while listening to a good piece of music??)

Have you got any other advice/ideas, please?
I think these are the “only” problems he explained he has with me. Do you think it was a subliminal message to say that he doesn’t want to take me or it was a way to tell me to change some aspects? I really want to improve, I want to become a good scientist and be able to study what I like! I'll do everything!!! Let's go study now!!!
Thanks in advance for reading and for your help!!

Hi Enzyme,
Nice to hear so much enthusiasm and determination from you! It sounds to me as if your PI is helping you to get better before taking you as PhD by giving you this feedback! Keep on working and studying and I'm sure it will be well rewarded! :-)
All the best and please let me know!

Enzyme, I'm going to be honest and direct with you.

The easiest way to find out if this PI wants to take you as a PhD student is to ASK HIM. That's the only way you are going to get a straight answer.

Sometimes enthusiasm is not enough. You need to have the technical and personal skills required to do a PhD. Ask your PI whether he thinks you are capable of doing a PhD and whether he will take you on.

It also seems like you are struggling to read situations effectively and therefore you arrive at incorrect conclusions. Again, you will need to ask people directly to ensure you understand things properly because otherwise you are going to have difficulties during your PhD if you start doing something that was not intended due to miscommunication.

Self confidence is an important factor to master in order to have a successful and enjoyable PhD. Even those of us with a lot of belief in ourselves can become downhearted when we don't get the results we want. You have to work on overcoming this early on in any PhD that you do. Take classes and read books on the subject.

He is right about failure. You will fail to achieve something you wanted many, many times in your PhD. You need to be able to deal with this and learn from it.

Thanks guys but I don’t need anymore for your advice, I need to continue studying hard everyday focusing only on what I like and what I want to do! I spoke to lots friends of my lab who had each one his own troubles in the first six months and they did this and now they are great! I’m going to be banal: SOMEDAY WE’LL DIE, so we must fight our fears for what we really want! We have just one chance! The only real failure is do not fight!
I’m trying my best and enjoying, this is the way!
It has been useful to express all my worries here. Good luck to everyone!

Good luck. I hope it works out for you. Remember though: sometimes you need to know when to surrender in a fight. Somethings are not worth dying over.

AMEN!