Messed up already

S

Hi everyone,

Feeling embarrassed and disheartened as I'm seven months into my PhD and behind already.

The original project plan I submitted had two stages: one year data analysis and then field work starting part way through the second year. So I've been focusing on the data analysis, getting the skills for that, and this is mainly what I've been discussing with my supervisor. The field work has not been without problems: two possible sites, both with pitfalls.

I started at an odd time (April) and didn't have any induction or the usual guidance on how to do a PhD. It's only now that I'm on the September course, and a bit horrified by some of the stuff I didn't know - e.g. exactly what is required for upgrade.

Anyway, I've probably made myself sound like a terrible student, but because all the field work prospects sounded pretty un-feasible, and I genuinely thought I was mainly focusing on the data now (thought it would be my upgrade) I haven't got very far in planning anything. Now upset, my supervisor probably thinks I'm rubbish. But also I wish she'd told me earlier if she had concerns (I've only realised this in the last few weeks). E.g. finally emailed someone about a field site who sounded puzzled not to have heard from me (I suspect he and my supervisor talked about this) but given that my supervisor practically told me I couldn't go there any more.. and now she's wondering why I didn't try and organise things before.. I wish she would consider whether her previous advice might have affected my actions. Perhaps I am just making excuses for myself. I know I'm supposed to be an independent researcher, but what I'm supposed to do has seemed very confusing (more than I can explain here).

Any advice, similar experiences, optimism appreciated.. Please not too much critique - I know a lot of this is my fault!

T

Hi Selkie

Brainstorm what you need to do, turn that into a plan of action, and start - in bitesize chunks. You'll get there. Seems like you might need to determine what is your focus now - continuation report or data (or both). There should be a document telling you what is required/expected - e.g., a document of how many words, covering what (intro, RQs, plan, timetable) and when the deadline is. If there isn't, you could check this with your advisor / supervisor / other PhD students you know.

Don't mope, forget about whose fault anything was, make a plan and get going! (And maybe make a conscious note that you need to try and extract info from your sup going forward, as it seems they are not the type to give it for free but rather expect you to read their mind!)

P

Quote From Selkie:
Hi everyone,

Feeling embarrassed and disheartened as I'm seven months into my PhD and behind already.

The original project plan I submitted had two stages: one year data analysis and then field work starting part way through the second year. So I've been focusing on the data analysis, getting the skills for that, and this is mainly what I've been discussing with my supervisor. The field work has not been without problems: two possible sites, both with pitfalls.

I started at an odd time (April) and didn't have any induction or the usual guidance on how to do a PhD. It's only now that I'm on the September course, and a bit horrified by some of the stuff I didn't know - e.g. exactly what is required for upgrade.

Anyway, I've probably made myself sound like a terrible student, but because all the field work prospects sounded pretty un-feasible, and I genuinely thought I was mainly focusing on the data now (thought it would be my upgrade) I haven't got very far in planning anything. Now upset, my supervisor probably thinks I'm rubbish. But also I wish she'd told me earlier if she had concerns (I've only realised this in the last few weeks). E.g. finally emailed someone about a field site who sounded puzzled not to have heard from me (I suspect he and my supervisor talked about this) but given that my supervisor practically told me I couldn't go there any more.. and now she's wondering why I didn't try and organise things before.. I wish she would consider whether her previous advice might have affected my actions. Perhaps I am just making excuses for myself. I know I'm supposed to be an independent researcher, but what I'm supposed to do has seemed very confusing (more than I can explain here).

Any advice, similar experiences, optimism appreciated.. Please not too much critique - I know a lot of this is my fault!


That last sentence suggests you are too emotionally fragile for your own good. There will plenty of time to wallow in self pity at a later date (and we ALL do it believe me). Right now you need to hold it together and make a recovery plan and work through it methodically. Good luck with this.

S

Thanks very much for the sound advice - I will follow it! And yes, probably try a confidence and resilience course.

T

All the best Selkie!

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